You'll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again

One Woman's Painfully Funny Quest to Give It Up

By: Heather McDonald

Narrated by: Heather McDonald

You’ll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again is the laugh-out-loud story of an attractive Los Angeles woman who found herself in the predicament of being an unwilling virgin.

As an actress, writer, and stand-up comedienne, Heather McDonald passed up ample opportunities to have her V-card revoked by handsome, rich, and sometimes even fabulously famous men, but she could not bring herself to do "it" until well after her friends had been deflowered. As Chelsea Handler so lovingly puts it, "Thank God, Heather waited 27 years to lose her virginity or she wouldn't have any material for this book."

Whether in a backseat, a community pool, or a sports stadium, with a frat boy, a doctor, or an A-list celebrity, Heather McDonald knew how to turn those boys blue. Unlike "putting out", blue balling might not have paid her rent or landed her free trips to Hawaii, but it did provide her with hilarious stories and adventures in her search for true love - and, ultimately, her very own happy ending. Now, Heather McDonald will never blue ball in this town again.

©2010 Heather McDonald (P)2011 Brilliance Audio, Inc.

Critic reviews

"The only thing funnier than Heather's impersonation of us is... this book!" (Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe Kardashian)

love Heather

Heather is hilarious. I'm so glad I found this book. Now I've listened to all of her books

So funny

Loved this book , I can’t believe it took me this long to listen to it. Hilarious

SO WONDERFULLY FUNNY. I would turn on my audiobook as often as I could

Heather McDonald is a huge talent with a lot of presence and poise in her narration. I really enjoyed getting to know her and the life that she’s lived. She’s got a lot of heart and soul but can be sharply witty. This is one funny Lady!

In the genre of the incredible Chelsea Handler, who can tell stories that make you laugh out loud (Like the prison story in her book, “Vodka...” (I think), I felt Heather was by far more consistent and even in her storytelling, always making a point, never rambling, and never disgusting in her over-drinking. Heather was purposeful and wanted to pass on what she’s learned. I enjoyed her voice as it was expressive and really pleasant. You can really feel close to Heather through her experiences, and I rooted for her. I was sorry that this book was only about three hours (but actually felt like eight in a good way) but glad that her next book (the new) is five or so hours. I can’t wait to read that! Don’t miss this gem!

An essential for a Juicy Scooper!

If you love Heather McDonald, this is an awesome look into her backstory! Love that it was read by her, I love her honesty and funny stories about her youth!

So hilarious

I feel like me and Heather had the same dating history. Lol This was the best. Now I don’t feel so abnormal about my Dating history. 💞💞💞