Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me

By: Chelsea's Family Friends and Other Victims

Narrated by: Johnny Kansas, Stephanie Stehling, Heather McDonald, Roy Handler, Brad Wollack, Amber Mazzola, Josh Wolf, Soshanna Handler, Eva Magdalenski, Amy Meyer

Length: 6 hrs and 44 mins

Publisher's Summary

"My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate."
—Chelsea Handler, from Chapter 10 of Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

It's no lie: Chelsea Handler loves to smoke out "dumbassness", the condition people suffer from that allows them to fall prey to her brand of complete and utter nonsense. Friends, family, co-workers - they've all been tricked by Chelsea into believing stories of total foolishness and into behaving like total fools. Luckily, they've lived to tell the tales and, for the very first time, write about them.

©2011 Chelsea Handler (P)2011 Hachette Audio

Money Grab… Chelsea Owes Me a Credit!

First off let me say I am (or rather was) a huge Chelsea fan! When she is on her A game she is possibly the funniest woman alive. Her previous 3 books have had me laughing out loud and sharing them with all my girlfriends.
This book however is simply a sad attempt at a money grab. It appears as though Chelsea had nothing to do with this book, yet has shamelessly plastered her name and image all over it. Granted the stories are about her (for the most part) but are written by others poorly attempting to emulate her style. Its truly terrible and they should all be ashamed. *Spoiler Alert* One chapter is ‘written by’ Chunk… Yes Chunk. Her dog. Need I say more?
I have never been more annoyed over the complete waste of a credit! I warn you, if you are hoping for classic Chelsea, skip this and just re-enjoy one of her old books.

Not as good as "Vodka, it's Chelse..."

I got this after literally rolling on the floor listening to "Vodka, it's Chelsea." While this was kinda of funny, it just wasn't as good. Could be cause it is based entirely on pranks she pulls rather than her self-deprecating humor that was so funny.

I loved it... but I "get" the humor.

Would you listen to Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me again? Why?

I listened to this without first reading other reviews, because Chelsea Handler makes me laugh on a nightly basis. Now reading them, I don't understand other reviewers saying, "I love her, but reading this makes me realize that she's cruel/immature/mean..." Have you never seen her?

I think most people don't have friendships that are so obnoxiously immature on the outside. I think that's why they don't "get it." My core group of friends/family say and do crazy things to each other constantly in order to get a laugh. If you sat in a room with my best friend and I, you'd think we hated each other by the way we talk sometimes. However, the people in my world would do ANYTHING for me, and I for them. There isn't one person in this book that doesn't say that very thing about her.

If you don't get why people do obnoxious things to their friends, this book isn't for you... but then again, I don't know why you'd read it in the first place. If you can watch Chelsea Handler's show and not get that she's obnoxious and bitchy, you're missing something. This book answers the question, "I wonder how bitchy she really can be," answer being, "A LOT." It's college frat boy humor... she's a jackass boy with breasts.

I thought this book was funnier than VODKA... I actually didn't like that one at all. Having said that, I didn't think every narrator was great, but I did like hearing each voice separately. I do think that Chelsea Handler should have narrated her own part. Hearing other voices, especially those you "know" (Heather McDonald, Josh Wolf, Roy Handler) makes it weird when someone is else is reading her part. There are also musical transitions separating each chapter that I thought were weird and out of place.

Love all of Chelsea's books. But this one sucks.

It's weird bc I'm such a fan of Chelsea, but her friends are a tad annoying in this book. For example, it seems like they've all listened to her self-read audiobooks & sort of emulated her performance style. badly.

also....and maybe it's just me....but are all of these people super super stupid? if chelsea is such a known prankster, wouldn't most of these pranks have been visible from space? Once guy is duped into leaving his honeymoon early b/c he was told that TIME Magazine was putting the writing staff of Chelsea Lately on the COVER. Reeeeeally? Seriously? I mean, I know that Time Magazine does actually dumb down the American version of its publication by making it more pop culture skewed ((that's actually true...the rest of the world gets another version of the magazine....wtf)) but, seriously.....i don't think i need to continue. You get it. It's OBVIOUSLY a prank. Jeez.

so many other examples....and none really that funny, except probably to the people involved.

Oof. Wait for Uganda to Be Kidding Me to come out on audible.

Meh. Maybe...

What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

The energy from some of the narrators was a little dead. It felt as if they had been reading for hours, and they were at the very end and restless.

It would have been so much better if Chelsea Handler could have read her parts. Everybody else read their own parts. Chelsea Handler has such a nice voice...

Has Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me turned you off from other books in this genre?

No. I think I'll just have to pay more attention to the reviews before i purchase.

What did you like about the performance? What did you dislike?

I like that the stories were told by the people who wrote it, and by the people the events happened to. It was nice that they were able to mimic the sounds of surprise or the accents spoken. The pauses were accurate and done in a way that I would not have been able to imagine reading on my own.

See above for dislikes.

You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?

The book was entertaining. It made me giggle on the inside often. It was just evident that none of these people are used to writing in book format. It was so poorly written, that even the decent performances couldn't save it. It was entertaining and worth a listen if it is free.

The characters become real

What made the experience of listening to Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me the most enjoyable?

The characters in all of Handler's previous books finally become real and take the reins in this book.

What did you like best about this story?

Chelsea graciously replies to each story with her own rebuttal in the only way she knows how: delightfully insulting.

Which scene was your favorite?

Chelsea is able to bring those around her into her schemes to make them more realistic. She convinces can take somebody's weakness and exploit it to the brink of destruction. She had an OCD colleague convinced that her employee was becoming her adoptive son, living with her, going on vacations with her, not paying rent... but it was never true. This wouldn't bother most people, but Chelsea knew an OCD wouldn't be able to take it. Brilliant.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

Everything. I'd love to be Chelsea's friend.

Yuck and more yuck!

What could have made this a 4 or 5-star listening experience for you?

Nothing at all. These are horrible stories about practical jokes that are way to over the top for my taste. I do think she if funny but the things she does to the people in her life are horrible and cruel and I guess that is where I draw the line of funny.

Has Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me turned you off from other books in this genre?

No, not at all but will just be more careful in the future about reading others reviews.

You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?

No, I could not even finish it. It made me want my money back for purchasing it.

Unfunny

I loved 'Vodka' and I have to compare the laugh-out-loud humor of that book to this one, which offers just a few smiles. And these aren't worth wading through all the cruel pranks that are reported with no real explanation of why these people are Chelsea's 'friends' except that they're on the payroll. I tried hard to like this, but my mood and morale were deteriorating from all the pointless profanity, slimy images, and unchallenging, childish humor.

Eh

Didn’t age well. Lots of stuff that would not fly these days. It’s a bit cringe

Hilarious but mean spirited

Chelsea Handler is hilarious. The stories about her are funny. But the word “retard” was used by every single person telling a chapter with one exception (props to Heather MacDonald for being funny without that). Just all came off a bit mean spirited. I laughed but ended the book grateful I don’t have a “friend” like her. She seems to really get her kicks by doing mean things to her friends that take jokes too far. Ruining honeymoons? It’s too much. In my humble opinion. But, yeah, I laughed.