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The Science of Self Talk: How to Increase Your Emotional Intelligence and Stop Getting in Your Own Way

Positive Psychology Coaching Series, Book 18
Narrated by: Randy Streu
Length: 1 hr and 37 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (19 ratings)
Regular price: $6.95
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Publisher's Summary

Talking to ourselves - and learning to listen

We all speak to ourselves on a daily basis. Whether it’s out loud or an internal (or infernal) commentary, we all practice self-talk, and how we speak to ourselves can have a significant effect on our emotions and subsequent actions.

Some people’s self-talk is mostly about the future while, for others, it’s an internal dialogue about the past. Some self-talk is positive and upbeat, while other self-talk is harsh, critical, or defeatist. Self-talk can focus on other people, but, more often than not, it is about ourselves - and is often negative.

If you listen carefully, you’ll notice that your inner conversation reflects thoughts and emotions. Self-talk isn’t random. It exhibits patterns that repeat themselves. And everyone has their own characteristic self-talk that is uniquely theirs.

In The Science of Self Talk, mindfulness expert Ian Tuhovsky explains how we can rewrite the script when it comes to our internal communication. Through a series of simple exercises for use in daily life, you can understand your own self-talk in order to change the conversation.

This unique book covers:

  • Constructive self-talk and dysfunctional self-talk - and knowing the difference
  • The impact of negative self-talk
  • Learned helplessness
  • Positive self-talk - challenge or threat?
  • The Pareto Principle which says that, for many events, roughly 80 percent of the effects come from 20 percent of the causes
  • Creating the right circumstances for motivation
  • Getting to know yourself
  • Loving yourself - emotional intelligence
  • Turning down the volume on your self-talk

Self-talk is a little like turning on the director’s commentary on a movie. You can simply watch the movie, or you can add in commentary about what’s happening in it - this is, in a nutshell, what most of us do in our daily lives. The Science of Self Talk can help you to rewrite the script of your movie and improve the way that you - and others - see yourself.

©2018 Ian Tuhovsky (P)2018 Ian Tuhovsky

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very beneficial

this is the first book i ever finished in my entire life, it just gets you so attcahed and eager to listen to more and more of the ideas that would motivate you and really out you in a much more positive state. i loved that its simple , no complications at all and that its not long, so i was happy to feel the sence of achievement after finishing this book, and i would have done it with Ian readig it in the most beautiful way. its addictive, i cant wait to read his other books.

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simple effective useful

Easy to listen, perfect for car commuting from home to work , open your eyes on some mondo dynamics

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  • Suzan
  • SF Bay Area
  • 12-29-18

Everyone should listen to this book

Wow this should be listened to by everyone. This book is all about changing the way you talk to yourself. Now you might say I never talk to myself but you would be wrong. You may not even be aware of it and most likely it is a negative voice. I live in a world with many family and friends being more negative than positive with me. So the last thing I need is to be negative with myself too. I found this book to be very easy to listen to and ably. Do you know a teenager? Get them this book someday they will thank you. Randy Streu is the narrator for this audiobook and his voice is perfect for this audiobook, easy to listen to and follow. I was gifted this book with the understanding that I would leave an honest review.

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Great motivation!

Very satisfying content, great examples of how we diminishing ourselves with negative self talk, also piece of good advice how to transform it into positive self talk in easy way! I like the idea of walking meditation and combination of some of them too. Keep it up! Exercises are very useful as such quoting is on point.

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A Great Guide

This is a great guide for those looking to change their inner musings. I've always thought of myself as a fairly positive person but after listening to this book and doing some of the exercises I realized that I could do a lot better. The author does an excellent job trying to cover the main points of being aware of one's self talk and helping to give people a starting point. Of course there's always more that can be said and done to improve but this book gives a great place to start. I enjoyed listening to it and learned a bit more about myself in the process. The narration was well done and helped to keep the listener engaged.

I was given this free review copy audio book at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

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Loved it until it got controversial at the end

Clear definitions, instructions, and loved the exercises at the end of the chapters. 95% of the book was wonderful and I was happy doing the work until the last chapter.

Maybe I misunderstood the author's intentions with the section referring people to paid testing at the end, but when I hear sections about adding extrovert tendencies to introverts, I have to disagree with going up against one's hardwired tendencies. If I'm going to take a paid test for personal work, I personally choose the Gallup Strengthsfinder program. Better to learn the balconies and basements of my personal makeup than start getting into categories like Neurotic Tendencies and other terms of art I'm not comfortable with outside of a trained psychologist or psychiatrist rendering them in a diagnosis while working with a person.

I'm still giving the book a good rating as it was more helpful than not. The length was good - informative without dragging. The narrator made me forget he was there - always a good sign when I sink into the book. I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

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So much more than I expected.

I wanted to check out this audiobook because I had heard about self talk and I wanted to learn to identify my own self talk more easily and work to make it more positive. The author gave pleanty of tips and practical exercises to help with that, but also explained so much about how it works in a way that was easy for me to understand. He also touched on many subject areas that I have heard before but didn't fully understand and brought them together in a way that made sense to me. Subjects like cognitive dissonance, learned helplessness, the pareto principle, and intrinsic versus extrinsic motivation to name a few. I feel like this not only helps me understand the basics, but points me in several directions that I might want to learn more about next in order to gain a deeper understanding. From now on, this will be the first thing I recommend to anyone who is serious about wanting to overcome negative thoughts and not sure where to start.

I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

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Very Informative

I enjoyed this book. I think as a society we need to improve our self talk and encourage others to improve their own self talk (especially teens and children). I read a lot of self help but this is a topic that is normally mentioned in passing, this book gave a lot of good insight and a lot of ideas that you can try.

I would recommend this book and I plan to revisit it in the future.

I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

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Good and quick review of positive self talk principles

I enjoyed this fast paced review of self talk principles. It had some great tips for breaking bad habits and becoming a more positive about yourself. I would’ve thought that self talk included all internal dialogue and would’ve liked to see more tips and strategies to work on all internal dialogue. This book, however, was focused only on thoughts about yourself and self image. If that’s something you struggle with then this is the book for you.

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Excellent Book for the Inner Self

I received this audiobook free for an honest review. This is a great book to get you out of a rut with negative thinking. Not just the negativity around you, but the negativity inside you. Self worth is important to a person's well being. This book helps you to identify and change your inner speach. Great to help you change not only the view of your inner self, but that which you show others.