No More Mr. Nice Guy

Publisher's Summary

Originally published as an eBook that became a controversial media phenomenon, No More Mr. Nice Guy! landed its author, a certified marriage and family therapist, on The O'Reilly Factor and the Rush Limbaugh radio show. 

Dr. Robert Glover has dubbed the "Nice Guy Syndrome" trying too hard to please others while neglecting one's own needs, thus causing unhappiness and resentfulness. It's no wonder that unfulfilled Nice Guys lash out in frustration at their loved ones, claims Dr. Glover. He explains how they can stop seeking approval and start getting what they want in life, by presenting the information and tools to help them ensure their needs are met, to express their emotions, to have a satisfying sex life, to embrace their masculinity and form meaningful relationships with other men, and to live up to their creative potential.  

©2000, 2003 Robert Glover (P)2017 Recorded Books

Nailed me right between the eyes

As a 46 year old male, ex-Marine, and self professed “nice guy” I finally understand that all this time, I have been causing my own pain. It hasn’t been my career, my spouse, my friends, my environmental conditions. The common factor in all those things has been me. No more Mr. nice guy described many of my own internal feelings like someone was reading my mind. Things that I’ve never told anyone. Now that I have clarity on these issues, I now have a way to work through them to be set free. I’ve already applied some of the techniques with immediate results. Mainly because the change started with me, which then encouraged positive responses from others. So basically, now I’m in the process of reviewing all of my thoughts and actions to challenge and change the defaults. If you even think this book might help you, take a chance. I did and I’m so very thankful to the author.

14 of 14 people found this review helpful

literally fixed me

I struggled to find the answer to why my marriage failed and my ex girlfriend cheated on me. the book cured me of my condition. real help inside. actionable and practical.

9 of 9 people found this review helpful

amazing book

listened to it multiple times. cant say enough about how its helped me, in my personal and professional life. this contained innumerable revelations about why I do the things I do, and how to better myself in those situations.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

Life Changing

Every man needs to read this book. Period.
It's everything you missed growing up, and everything you need to be a happier and better man than you ever thought possible.
There's no clearer way to say this, do not skip this book. It literally saved my life, my relationships, and opened the door to a life I never dreamed was possible for me.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

Only for nice guys!

Overall, this book tries to explain the origin of the nice guy and why he acts like he does. Some good excercises to help overcome nice guy syndrome, but I only recommend this book if this is your first read on the topic.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

Very insightful...

Upon listening to the book, I listened the sample and from there it started describing certain things that made sense in describing the type of person I may be. So now I want to learn more in which I did, but it definitely takes another listen. So much information about what you can learn from being too passive and explains just enough for you to understand ways to control your niceness. I'm hoping to learn more the second time around, so I can better understand myself and how I treat others... thank you!

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

Practical guide for people pleasers

This book really resonated with me. It details many of the reasons and solutions for overcoming toxic shame. This is the updated version of the book. I’m not sure if the previous version had a pdf, but this one doesn’t. Tough to practically implement the recommended exercises without that.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

dissatisfied with life? buy the book

exellent book! it helps you see, how you in childhood from not getting your needs met, adapted to patterns of not making a lot of trouble, not asking for things and putting other people needs before your own (to deserve love, attention or whatever you need ), and how that's making it difficult getting your needs met as an adult.
it forces you to see your darker, disfunctional sides and how you sabotage for yourself. it's hard and felt heavy sometimes, but in the end I think it's worth it.
it encourages you to seek support and help from safe people, therapist or join a support group, to help you through your problems and help you get your needs met. there are 45 different exercises with questions to help you see and change your behavior. I will listen to this book again and do all of them. thanks for a great book!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

This book changed my life

Absolutely the worst best thing to ever happen to me. Finding this book saved my life. If you have ever been called a nice guy too much or consider yourself a nice guy read this book!

The first chapter was a punch to the gut and a knee to the face. my world was turned upside down immediately for the better. don't take my word for it. Get this book!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

Almost returned it halfway through.. glad I didn't

"Self-help for Cucks" was my initial impression of this title early on, and in a way, it is. The first half basically introduces the beta personalities that will be used as references and examples later on. The author is obviously a talented psychologist, and his motivations for writing this book admittedly stem from helping himself, and eventually groups of others deal with loveless, sexless, toxic relationships and personalities. Personally, I was having a difficult time and a little bit of buyer's remorse when trying to relate to the cases featured, as many others may experience. His insights and way of dissecting human behavior resonated with me just enough though, so I kept going.

The second half was where I found gold. I would like to point out that although the title and narrative is aimed at men, the insights into subconscious human "hangups" and motivations scattered throughout the book transcend gender, class, race, and any other "ism" that you may come into this pre-loaded with. Personal growth as a human being requires understanding the side of yourself that you probably aren't aware of, and he does an excelent job of pointing you in the right direction. Do not let your ego distract you from really listening, I promise that it's worth it.

Many of the psychological tactics employed here are lost on myself, and probably a lot of other people that are familiar with them... letting go of mental baggage, affirmations, etc. However, there is merit to these exercises, and they will do a world of good for the core audience that the book is aimed at. For others that are further along on your path, there are more than enough gems here to justify the digging. All in all, a very valuable book in terms of personal growth and understanding, and I highly recommend it.

3 of 4 people found this review helpful

for guys really struggling maybe... for others no.

this book is for guys who are really struggling in their relationship and life. I'm talking about guys who aren't allowed to go out, have the missus control the purse strings, have a dominant partner that treats then like shit etc. It endorses alot of support groups, 12 step groups etc

I bought this book to try and get some tips on how to say "no" to people at work and be a little more assertive... it focussed too much on a male being not too strong in his relationship at home and didn't really focus on work (although I'm sure transferable).

there is some good aspects of the book, but I felt 90% just wasn't applicable to my situation.

For: guys who are having trouble getting what they want at home (their own time, speaking up etc)

Not for: guys who feel their relationship at home is good, but feel they could do with some more assertiveness.

33 of 36 people found this review helpful

Conflicted

I have to say that I am somewhat conflicted about this book. On one hand I found some of the personal observations ‘spot on’, but I could not relate to any of the supposed causes of the ‘Nice Guy’ syndrome. I think the root cause analysis is far to simplistic and not really based on current scientific thinking on how our personalities are formed. That said, their are some nuggets to be found in the section ms on self sabotaging behaviour

7 of 7 people found this review helpful

Game Changer

I didn’t know what to expect from the book, but it helped me realise who I am and I can make big changes in my life now. A really helpful listen.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

A turning point in my life.

The same as what the author/narrator states, every chapter will resonate with the 'nice guy'.
The author has had enough experience dealing with nice guys to be able to hit on alot of signals associated with the issue to which i was not prepared for. To say he knows my deep seated issues is an understatement.
Quality of narration and subject knowledge is top class.
If you want to get the most out of this audio book, do not take this as a fleeting past time that you listen to on the way to work for 15minutes; dive into it head first, set a few hours aside regularly to do the activities and dig down deep to confront all the shit and sort out all that preprograming that is holding you back.

14 of 18 people found this review helpful

every man needs to read

this is an amazing book for both men and women an eye opener and a new happy life

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

Sensible Observations

The book details a (male child's) defective self development at childhood and how it affect his choice of spouse and subsequently his conduct in the relationship by passing on the buck, when in reality the man uses pkeasing behaviour to cover up for his short coming , and sonehows sees the other person as the issue, despite the man (child) best effort ar deceptive an overt pleasing behaviour. The pleasing behaviour is includes but is not limited to the following. Buying his partner gifts, helping with house work and generally doing whats expected of a (beta male) or man child

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

The best book a man can read!

Where do I start? After trying to find a cure for struggling with life and love. Having read books on self help, spirituality and the meaning of life this book diagnosed me 100%. Yep I am a Nice Guy! This was like reading my own life story.... because it was! I read this book open mouthed and amazed, after 50 years of hell I now know the problem that has been my constant curse. I owe Robert Glover a debt of gratitude, because now I can hopefully become a "Man" and not a "Nice guy" anymore. If you're a male out there struggling in life and love and never getting to where you think you deserve to be you have to read this book. In fact I think every man needs to read this book to stop and to halt the nice guy/half man plague that has afflicted the male population. BUY THIS BOOK YOU WILL NOT BE SORRY 10/10

2 of 3 people found this review helpful

Probably the most important book I have ever read

See your relationships for what they are/were. This book shows you how you have a nice guy mentality that in fact causes more problems, insecurities and manipulation within you.

Just read this damn book, and then read it another 3 times.

3 of 5 people found this review helpful

Good listen. Helped me a lot

The book was scarily accurate to what I experience in life and has helped me to think about actions I can take to overcome them. Well worth a listen for any man experiencing difficulties in life.

Life changing stuff in here

This book is probably the most important book I have ever listened to. If you exhibit any of the nice guy traits found on their website then this book will have something for you.