• How Not to Blend

  • Lovestrong Book, 1
  • By: Susan Hawke
  • Narrated by: Michael Pauley
  • Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (266 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

One clueless single dad...

Dr. Corbin Davis is a busy guy just trying to do his best as a single parent. He may be oblivious to a lot of things, but surely he would’ve noticed something as important as his 15-year-old son Grayson being bullied, right? And what the heck is nonbinary, and why hasn’t Gray shared this all-important part of himself with his own dad? 

Plus one sassy Southerner...

Andy Ferguson, or Kandi as the Thursday night drag community knows him, is just trying to get along in a small town and hold things together while he takes care of his beloved Gam-Gam. If she’d just get off his back about finding himself a man, that would be fantastic, thank you very much. He’ll get around to love...one of these days. 

Equals a pair of fake boyfriends who will keep you in stitches.

When Corb gets the wild idea to ask Andy to pose as his boyfriend to let Gray know that his dad is bisexual and open-minded enough to talk to about his nonbinary status, Andy is amused and just intrigued enough to say yes...especially since he seems to be in the market for a fake boyfriend himself, if it will get Gam-Gam to quit nagging. 

©2019 Susan Hawke (P)2019 Susan Hawke

What listeners say about How Not to Blend

Average Customer Ratings
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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Laugh out loud! Best book in a long time!

My face hurts from all the laughing and smiling I did when I listened to this today. No dull moments, lags in the story or hiccups in the audio. Mr. Pauley was flawless once again. I cant wait for more!!

8 people found this helpful

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charming and fun

Found book by looking for Michael Pauley’s narration - not sure if he just picks good books or if his narration makes the difference in how enjoyable a book is, but either way, I enjoyed this one.

Trigger Warnings: hate based violence, & accidentally injured dog

This romance moved almost glacially, but it was still a fun trip, with good friends and good drag. The main characters all have good friends and allies that help things along.

The only issue I had was that for all it was LGBTQ friendly, it was pretty white and I’m noticing that sort of exclusion more these days.

5 people found this helpful

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perfect!

How Not To Blend by Sussn Hawke is the first novel in the new LOVESTRONG series. It is a hilarious story of fake boyfriends finding real love. The colorful and wonderful characters that fill the pages had me laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes. There are also some moments that leave you feeling all the feels and deals with serious topics. Oh and a flash mob moment that made me squeal. It is hard to not fall in love with the amazing people in this book. If this is the first book, I can not wait to see what comes next.

Narrator Michael Pauley does a fantastic job bringing the characters' personality out. Each voice unique and perfect.... the story comes to life.

5 people found this helpful

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Everything I love in a m/m romance

This story was a blend of everything I love - snark, kids, a crazy dog, a wise and spunky elder, bullies getting what they deserve, drag queens, awesome BFF's, and lots and lots of fun. I loved Susi Hawke's stories before but Susan Hawke gets me.
I listened to this story rather than reading it and Michael Pauley is an exemplary narrator. He brings the characters to life not just visually but emotionally as well. His pacing is bang on and I love his granny voice. I would encourage anyone who wants to read this book to listen to it if they enjoy audio.

3 people found this helpful

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Oh Michael Pauley!!!

This book!! wow!! I laughed so much, It's strange they cover some tough situations and still I laughed OUT loud. Michael Pauley as always did a GREAT job with all the different voices and brought this story to life. I think this is one of his BEST narrating jobs yet. I like the way the story flows and never strays off topic or gets hard to follow. Book 1 is a hit, hopefully the rest of the series is as funny and covers more of the LGBTQ life style issues and life challenges for those who aren't out yet. You can use a different first name for every book but, Miss Hawke, your writing is spot on, as always!!

3 people found this helpful

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So sassy

I love Susi Hawke’s mpreg books and she doesn’t disappoint with her new non mpreg book. I had a smile on my face almost the entire time I read this. Andy is so crazy I just love him! Add in a semi clueless dad, a match making Gam Gam and evil dog and you have one of the funniest books ever!

Michael Pauley SLAYED this book!! Andy could have been so over the top but Michael portrayed him perfectly!!

3 people found this helpful

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Ugh I can't finish it

It really is one big eye roll. I spent half the boom waiting to laugh but nothing was funny. The story line was predictable, unoriginal and dull. I see what the author was trying to do and fell very short. I would be more impressed if 15 year old wrote it.

2 people found this helpful

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So stereotyped it's actually painful to listen to

I used to tend bar in a drag club in the 1970s - the clichéd dialog in this book could have been recorded back then. Painful. The only reason I gave the performance three stars is the somewhat amusing interpretation Michael Pauley gives drag mother Honey.

The story is implausible, the characters have no depth, and the romance is impossible to believe. Really? The cardiologist who has raised a pretty wonderful child with the help of a savvy BFF suddenly forgets the existence of, you know, research, and believes that he has nowhere to turn for help with talking to his gender-fluid son than a friend-of-a-friend twitterpated drag queen? And the two of them decide the best route to honesty with the son is to fake being boyfriends? The characters give some lip-service to distinguishing non-binary gender identity from drag persona, but the plot throws that all out the window. The sub-story about bullying is okay, but is resolved in such a cartoonish manner that it dismisses the seriousness and pervasive pain threatening non-conforming students. The supporting characters appear to have been rolled up with dice: the homophobic church elder whose recently-hired pastor is an out bisexual, the trash-talking grandma with a heart of gold, and some unfunny strangeness about a one-eyed demonic dog that hates its owner...

Truly dreadful.

1 person found this helpful

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Sweet!

I have gotten tired of gay romances with broken, damaged characters with dark kinks. It was nice to read wholesome, funny romance for a change.

1 person found this helpful

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Sweet and snarky romance with all the feels!

Really Good Narration by Michael Pauley. He did a good job with the voices and really made the characters come alive. I had read the kindle version previously, so i really got to enjoy the story unfolding in the Audio version,

Dynamic, funny, snarky, gritty and heartfelt, sweet romance with all the feels!! I loved this incredible book!! There is so much that is really special about this story from the wonderful characters to the great story-line. I enjoyed the flow of the book and it definitely will keep you reading and enjoying from cover to cover.

Corbin and Andy are delightful characters and i love them together. I also enjoyed the supporting characters that gave depth and color. This story deals with some really important and challenging topics and i thought the author did a really good job of shedding light on them.

i laughed and i cried in this really special book! I highly recommend it!

1 person found this helpful

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Profile Image for Wide Eyes, Big Ears!
  • Wide Eyes, Big Ears!
  • 06-17-22

Enjoyable, entertaining fake-relationship romance!

Dr Corbin Davis has never told his son, Grayson, he is bisexual. It seemed moot until his wife died. But when Corbin discovers Gray is non-binary and is being bullied at school, he enlists the help of Andy Ferguson (aka Kandi) to help his son open up. Andy is a barista by day and a drag queen by night. In an effort to appease his ailing grandmother, he and Corbin concoct a fake relationship. While the premise for Andy needing a fake relationship and the logic of Andy’s classic ‘relationship speedbump’ were both a bit thin, overall this is a pretty enjoyable and entertaining romance. There’s lots of sass, attitude, and the characters have a lot of fun. Corbin’s early treatment of his son didn’t endear himself, but his mistakes showed he is human and he certainly made up for it over time. Audio narrator Michael Pauley channeled his fierce inner-drag queen as only he can, great job! Vale, Susan Hawke, you’ll be missed. I’m looking forward to the rest of the Lovestrong Series.