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Publisher's Summary

A smart, sexy guide to embracing the repressed, tabooed, and often unwanted aspects of ourselves so we can discover our inner power and finally live the life we deserve.

“We always get exactly what we want; but often, though we may not be aware of it, what we most want is dark - very dark.” 

Each of us has a dual nature: we are light (conscious) and dark (unconscious). The dark side of our personality - the “other”, the shadow side - is made up of what we think is our primitive, primal, negative impulses - our “existential kink.” Our existential kink also drives the dark or negative repeating patterns in our life: always choosing the abusive partner or boss, settling for less, thinking that we’re undeserving, not worthy. But it also is the source of our greatest power. 

In Existential Kink, Carolyn Elliot, PhD, offers a truth-telling guide for bringing our shadow into the light. Inviting us to make conscious the unconscious, Elliot asks us to own the subconscious pleasure we get from the stuck, painful patterns of our existence. 

Existential Kink provides practical advice and meditations so we truly see our shadow side’s “guilty pleasures”, love and accept them, and integrate them into our whole being. By doing so, Elliot shows, we bring to life the raw, hot, glorious power we all have to get what we really want in our lives.

©2020 Carolyn Elliott, PhD (P)2020 Blackstone Publishing

What listeners say about Existential Kink

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Victim blaming, garbage.

As both a firm believer in "working your shadow" and a lifelong participant of consentual BDSM, this book was dangerously unhelpful. It dives into the damaging tactic of victim blaming and is wholly unhelpful to survivors of abusive relationships. People stay in those relationships for a myriad of reasons, including personal safety and to tell people they stay because they "love love love it" is in itself careless and dishonest at best.
Author should write trash fiction, perhaps, not self help.

18 people found this helpful

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Groundbreaking Shadow Integration Work!

At first I thought this book would teach me how to get kinky in the bedroom with blindfolds and floggers, but I was quickly blindsided with massive ah-ha’s within the first few minutes of the intro that this psychological approach to shadow work would completely transform my life from the inside out.

This method is the missing piece to “The Secret” Law of Attraction, the final straw for decades of various therapy practices that never fully resolved core issues, and the f-yeah to completely obliterating those pesky negative thoughts that most of us spiritually bypass with positive affirmations while keeping us in bondage.

Existential Kink is the key to finally healing the whole self, to gaining our full deliciously naughty power, and creating the life we really want. Bravo, Carolyn Elliot! This book changed my life, my therapy practice, and my sexual freedom in the bedroom without ever pulling out the whips and chains and feather floggers.

10 people found this helpful

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Thank you !!

Omg who knew I was so kinky??? Fu@k!!! Do listen to Carolyn on audible it’s truly a coaching session/initiation into liberation ! You’ll never be the same fucked up human... only better and freer fucked up whole human ! I mean I’ll be grateful till forever! Bless you sister for showing us the way out of our own shadow ! 🙏💗

7 people found this helpful

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loved it!

I have been doing shadow work for a while and this book really helped me dive deep. I love the way she related to real life and she has a great voice!

6 people found this helpful

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Kink

This book spoke to me. She has some very good points about dealing with emotions, relationships and magic.

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Wish I had read this 30 years ago...don't wait!

I will listen to this audiobook over and over until the deep wisdom shared by Carolyn takes root. While every sentence resonated with me, I know it will take several listens for the information to coalesce. Do yourself a favor, get started right away so you can begin the practice...lives are changed by this kind of work.

3 people found this helpful

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author is racist

bummer that carolyn elliot felt the need to engage in anti-indigenous rhetoric. purchasing this book is actively supporting and condoning racist behavior. go buy a bipoc or aapi authors book instead❤️

2 people found this helpful

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finally!

I tend to follow the teachings of the law of attraction and EK is the missing link that pulls it all together! 🥰

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ABSOLUTE MUST READ

I will be recommending this book to every single one of my friends family members and clients?!

I have read dozens of books on Law of Attraction, hermeticism, Magic, Alchemy, how to get what you want, how to make money, how to Think and Grow Rich, etc etc etc in this is the first book that I was immediately seeing a change as I was reading the book and barely doing the practices!

As I have dedicated more of a daily practice I see more of a daily result!

Carolyn Elliot has CRACKED THE CODE OF CONSCIOUS CREATING for us misfits, vagabonds, and kinky freaks!!

Hear me now, Thank me later- Don't think, just read!

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Excellent! Even better than I expected

Positively one of the best books I have read for improving ones life. Carolyn Elliott packs a ton of information into such a short time and she narrates her work with enthusiasm. I have a lot of work to do but feel I have recieved many tools for my journey.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Vikki B
  • 04-29-20

Absolute game changer, transformational work

The most powerful shadow work I've come across, the process is enlightening. This is such potent work, I love it, can do it again and again in all situations

1 person found this helpful

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  • Kirsty Dee
  • 04-21-21

No BS Law of Attraction

I've always struggled with the LAO and I didn't know this book was actually LAO. I got it on recommendation and because I wanted to dive into shadow work. This book covered shadow work, subconscious stuff and LAO. Highly recommended if your ready to look at your own stuff and have an open mind.

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  • Mr. S. B. D. Henderson
  • 04-09-21

The missing piece from the puzzle of transformation

If you have tried The Secret, Think and Grow Rich and all of the other book on transformation out there and been disappointed by the lack of results, this may be what you’ve been missing.
Shadow work is generally missing from most spiritual and religious texts... So get your fill here.
It might just change your life!

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  • lucy
  • 03-27-21

I love this

inspiring way to really embrace the shadow and explore what I do enjoy, however excruciating, about my constant blunders and attractions to misery, pain and endless situations I think I'm trying to avoid but overly recreate. I loved the juicy narration and upbeat pace.. I am using this body of work in my daily enquiries.. ok so what am I actually enjoying about this shitstorm!? the lack of avoidance has a charm here, its the fun part of shadow work, and why not! the existential kink being what I'm attracted to in the repetition, my kinky attraction to not showing up as a fully rounded accomplished adult human. I loved the humour and the ahhhas. and I will listen again. The work by byron katie is the authors other go to and i feel the two practices in enquiry are great side by side

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  • Luke littlejohn
  • 07-21-20

Very uneasy read

I love books regarding the shadow self. I’ve read a good handful, but I’m not sure what it is about this one. I really disliked the way the shadow self had been sexualised in this book. While I understand the theory and practise, I understand exactly what Elliot is suggesting and I can make sense of it, I just felt this read wasn’t for me. I’m sure it’ll work for many others but I couldn’t get past the sexualising nature of the book (which usually doesn’t bother me). Cant quite put my finger on it. But certainly wasn’t for me.

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  • fiona
  • 05-06-20

Very engaging and useful book

For me Carolyn's book offers a new and interesting way to engage with shadow work, taking it to the next level so that we can learn to become fully empowered to create our reality, not by denying the shadow but using pleasure to transmute the energy

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  • HSVocals
  • 03-02-20

Masterful, Shadow Integration, Manifestation,

A masterful technique of shadow integration with a metaphysical and spiritual approach. Will make particular sense to people with an understanding of the psyche and unconscious, and with the Vedas and Upanishads, and meditation techniques such as Vipassana. Will help any body who is brave enough, to come out of self sabotaging habits and repeatedly attracting negativity into their life. Carolyn's voice is also pleasant to listen to. Unlike some audible narrators who can somewhat ruin the listening experience by talking too fast or with a breathy voice, or with unauthentic tone. Carolyn's voice shows how successfuly integrated and individuated she is. Brilliant book.

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  • hziphbfcufhphv
  • 11-25-20

Great work!

A really interesting and helpful look into our shadow side. YOU must check this out.

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  • Darth Chungus
  • 10-21-20

A Course In Miracles for Hedonists

Some very thought provoking and challenging ideas, not for the faint of heart or brittle of humour. I especially enjoyed the author's interpretation of alchemical symbolism, some of the best I've come across. Recommended!