You wait all week for that call… and then it comes. But your child sounds miserable. They’re complaining about everything. The food, the people, the program. They tell you it’s not working. That they shouldn’t be there. Maybe they even promise they’ll do better if you just bring them home.

And suddenly, you’re right back in it: confused, overwhelmed, and questioning everything.

Did I make the wrong decision?
Is this actually helping them?
Should I be doing something different?

In this episode, Seth and I talk about an extremely common (and emotionally triggering) experiences parents face when their child is in treatment: the weekly call filled with negativity, complaints, and pressure to “fix” it.

Because here’s the truth: just because your teen is struggling, doesn’t mean something is wrong. And just because they’re telling you something, doesn’t mean you should take it at face value.

We walk you through what’s really going on underneath these conversations, why your teen might be showing up this way, and how to respond in a way that supports their growth without getting pulled into fear, guilt, or rescuing.

In this episode on when your teen is complaining about treatment, we discuss:

• Why teens often complain or “push back” during treatment (and what’s actually underneath it)
• How discomfort, challenge, and growth can show up as negativity
• The difference between valid concerns vs. emotional reactions
• Why it’s important not to blindly believe, nor completely dismiss, what your teen is saying
• How to gather accurate information without escalating the situation
• The common parenting patterns that get activated (rescuing vs. dismissing)
• What it looks like to respond in a grounded, supportive way
• How to give your teen or young adult autonomy instead of stepping in to fix things

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🧘Learn how to respond in hard moments, without losing your cool, the relationship, or yourself, inside my 6-week Boundaries Masterclass.

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.

You’re lying awake at night, running through every possible scenario. Should I step in? Should I say something? Should I let this go?

When your teen is struggling, it can feel nearly impossible to know what’s actually yours to handle and what isn’t. And without clarity, it’s so easy to slip into overthinking, overfunctioning, and trying to control things that were never yours to begin with.

In this episode, we’re introducing a simple but powerful framework: the Circles of Control, Influence, and Concern. This practical tool can help you step out of the constant confusion and into a more grounded, connected way of parenting. One where you stay present with your teen without losing yourself in the process.

[I go much deeper into this framework, and much more, inside my 6-week Boundaries Masterclass.]

We talk about why so many parents get stuck focusing on the wrong things, how that actually increases stress (for both you and your child), and what it looks like to shift your energy back to where it truly matters.

Because when you start to understand what is in your control as a parent, everything begins to change: your boundaries, your responses, and even your relationship with your teen or young adult child.

In this episode on what is in your control as a parent, we discuss:

• The three circles: control, influence, and concern, and what each one really means;
• Why parents often spend most of their time in the wrong circle;
• How trying to control what isn’t yours actually increases stress and disconnection in your family;
• Real-life examples (like school refusal and eating habits) to show you how to apply this framework;
• The difference between control language vs. influence-based communication;
• How to stay present and supportive without overfunctioning or rescuing;
• And much more.

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🧘Learn how to respond in hard moments, without losing your cool, the relationship, or yourself, inside my 6-week Boundaries Masterclass.

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.

Trust is one of the most fundamental parts of every relationship. If you don’t trust your teen, or you notice they don’t trust you, it will be hard to build the kind of parent-child relationship you want to have with your struggling teen or young adult.

But sometimes it can feel like an impossible task to ‘just trust’ your teen again, especially if that trust has been broken before. So how does trust actually work and more importantly… how do you begin to rebuild it when it feels broken?

In this episode, I sit down again with Danny Frazer to break down the anatomy of trust, using Brené Brown’s powerful BRAVING framework. We don’t just talk theory - we explore what this actually looks like in real-life parenting, especially when your teen is struggling.

Because here’s the truth: trust isn’t built in big, dramatic moments. It’s built (and rebuilt) in the small, everyday interactions between you and your child.

And often, it starts with you.

In this episode on how to rebuild trust with your teen, we discuss:

• What trust actually means (and why it feels so complicated as a parent);
• Brené Brown’s BRAVING framework explained in a practical, relatable way for parents of struggling teens and young adults;
• Why boundaries are essential for building trust (not the opposite);
• How reliability shows up in the small, everyday moments;
• The role of accountability and repair in strengthening your relationship;
• Why integrity and consistency matter more than perfection;
• How to practice non-judgment and shift into curiosity with your teen;
• What it really means to be generous (without becoming passive);
• Why parents need to go first when it comes to rebuilding trust;
• And much more!

More about Danny Frazer

Danny Frazer has spent nearly 30 years working in wilderness therapy and behavioral healthcare, including co-founding Open Sky Wilderness Therapy in 2006 and serving in leadership roles across the organization. For six of those years, he worked in admissions at Open Sky, speaking with and supporting thousands of families as they navigated the difficult decision of whether residential treatment was the right step for their family. Those conversations deeply shaped how he understands the realities parents face when contending with an at-risk child.

Today, he works as a leadership and business coach, helping leaders in behavioral healthcare navigate these complex, high-stress environments. He also volunteers his time as a board member of the Deer Hill Foundation, an outdoor adventure education and service learning program for youth located in Southwest Colorado. And, he is an active parent of two boys, including a teenager, an experience that continues to ground his work and perspective.

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.

You check their location, just to make sure they’re okay. Then again. And again. And suddenly, your entire nervous system is tied to a blinking dot on a map.

In this episode, Seth and I talk about something that so many parents are quietly struggling with right now: the urge to track, monitor, and stay one step ahead of your teen or adolescent… and how it slowly starts to take over.

Because here’s the uncomfortable truth: It never ends well. And just because we can track our kids, doesn’t mean we should. And yet, this has become so normalized that it barely gets questioned anymore.

Location tracking apps like “Find My” are often sold as peace of mind, but in reality, they can create more anxiety, more control, and more disconnection with your kid over time.

It’s addicting. It feels helpful in the moment. But long-term it can quietly erode trust within your family.

But letting go might feel impossible. It’s a hard shift. So what’s the solution? We’re talking all about it in today’s episode.

In this episode on tracking your adolescent’s location, we discuss:

• Why tracking apps like “Find My” can feel helpful but often create more anxiety;
• The addictive nature of monitoring your kid’s every move;
• How control is becoming normalized in modern parenting;
• Why “just because you can” doesn’t mean it’s helpful for your relationship;
• The long-term impact of over-monitoring on trust and connection within your family;
• What actually happens when parents begin to step back from tracking their kid’s location;
• The difference between being emotionally present and trying to fix or control;
• Why letting go feels so uncomfortable, and why that doesn’t mean it’s wrong;
• How to start shifting toward a more trusting, connected relationship with your teen or adolescent;
• What it really means to let your teen learn through experience.

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.

Is your son glued to his screen and telling you, “you just don’t get it”? But as a parent nowadays, you are navigating a world that looks very different from the one you grew up in. Video games double as social spaces. Screens shape friendships and status. And many teen boys are quietly struggling with anxiety, uncertainty about the future, and pressure they don’t always know how to talk about.

So how do you stay connected to your son when it feels like you’re speaking completely different languages?

In this episode, I sit down with licensed professional counselor Jarrod Hoffman, who specializes in working with teen boys. Jarrod shares what he sees every day in his counseling practice, from the hidden pressures boys face online to the misunderstandings that often happen between parents and sons.

Together, we explore why many boys say their parents “just don’t get it,” how video games and online spaces shape teen friendships today, and why anxiety is showing up so frequently in the lives of young men. Most importantly, we talk about how you can support your sons without rescuing them, but instead help them build the competence and confidence they need to become independent adults.

Jarrod also shares a simple but powerful communication tool parents can start using immediately to open up better conversations with their teen.

If you're raising a teenage boy and wondering how to stay connected while still helping him grow into his own independence, tune in. It’s a good one!

In this episode on parenting teen boys, we discuss:

• Why many (teenage) boys feel misunderstood by their parents;
• How video games and online spaces have become a central part of teen boys’ social lives;
• The rising levels of anxiety many boys are experiencing today;
• Why confidence grows through competence, failure, and real-life challenges;
• The difference between keeping kids safe and helping them become capable;
• How parents can avoid rescuing and instead support healthy independence in their sons;
• A powerful listening technique that helps teens think for themselves;
• How reflective listening can strengthen communication and trust with your teenage boy.

More about Jarrod Hoffman

Jarrod is a licensed professional counselor. He believes that teens are resilient and that parents are valuable. He was a teenage boy himself from 2004-2011. He loves reading books and is still on the fence about Messi or Ronaldo. He's experienced many life-changes, like his parent’s divorce when he was 10 and his dad's death when he was 28. He strives to help others find healing from wounds and triumph through suffering.

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.

You step in because you love your child.
You pay for treatment again because you’re scared.
You cover the rent because you don’t want them on the street.
You call to check in because something feels “off.”
You offer solutions because you can’t stand watching them struggle.

Of course you do.

But here’s the hard question:

What if, sometimes, the helping is reinforcing learned helplessness?

What if the message, completely unintentionally, becomes: “You can’t handle this without me.”

Learned helplessness doesn’t develop because parents don’t care. It often develops because you care so deeply that you rush in to protect, soften, fix, or prevent discomfort.

If you’ve ever felt torn between protecting your child and preparing them for real life, this conversation is for you.

Seth and I talk about how learned helplessness can form when tasks are repeatedly taken over, when consequences are softened too quickly, or when rescue becomes the pattern. We explore what it actually looks like to allow your teen or young adult child their discovery process, even when that means sitting in your own discomfort.

Because sometimes the most powerful message you can send your struggling teen is:

“I believe you can handle this.”

In this episode on learned helplessness, we discuss:

• What learned helplessness is and how it quietly develops in your teen or young adult child;
• How loving, generous parenting can unintentionally reinforce helplessness;
• The difference between necessary support and rescue;
• Why sitting with your own anxiety can change everything;
• How to evaluate when to step in, and when to step back;
• The long-term impact of allowing your teen to build capability;
• And more!

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.

You’ve heard me say it over and over again: You have to let go of what is out of your control. But does that mean you just stop parenting? Are you just supposed to sit back and watch your teen or young adult fail and make mistakes?

When you start stepping back from micromanaging, rescuing, and constantly stepping in, it often doesn’t feel like relief. It feels like you’re doing something wrong. You’re not the only one feeling like this. Today’s society reinforces helicopter parenting and letting that go can feel unnatural, confusing, and emotionally intense.

That’s why Seth and I unpack today why this shift feels so uncomfortable, what teens and young adults actually experience when parents pull back, and how to stay emotionally present while still holding boundaries.

Letting go doesn’t mean disappearing. It means learning how to support without rescuing, guide without controlling, and stay connected even when things are hard.

In this episode on parenting without helicoptering, we discuss:

• Why letting go often makes parents feel like they’re doing nothing;
• What teens and young adults experience when parents stop micromanaging and helicoptering;
• The difference between emotional support and rescuing;
• Why boundaries without follow-through break trust;
• How kids sometimes test connection by making it “all or nothing”;
• Why consequences can be powerful teachers (even when they’re hard to watch);
• How to stay present and supportive without fixing everything;
• What it means to parent in the gray area instead of going black-and-white;
• And more!

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.

The thought of wilderness therapy for your struggling kid can feel simultaneously hopeful and terrifying. Is it too extreme? Is it necessary? How do you even know? And how do you trust the people who would be caring for your child?

In this episode, I sit down with Danny Frazer, one of the founding partners of Open Sky Wilderness Therapy, to talk honestly about what makes wilderness therapy work, and what doesn’t. We explore why Open Sky stood out in the field, what parents should look for in a program, and why the single biggest predictor of success isn’t your teen’s effort… it’s yours.

Danny shares the origin story behind Open Sky’s family-centered model, why enrolling the whole family changes everything, and what he wishes every parent knew before making this incredibly hard decision. We also talk about the grief in the field right now, the contraction of wilderness programs, and why he believes the future still holds hope for nature-based healing.

If you are weighing treatment options for your struggling teen or young adult child, or simply trying to understand what wilderness therapy really involves, this conversation will give you clarity, perspective, and compassion.

In this episode on wilderness therapy for struggling teens, we discuss:

• What made Open Sky’s approach different in the wilderness therapy field;
• Why parent engagement is the biggest predictor of success in treatment;
• How to know when wilderness therapy might be the right next step;
• Red flags and green flags to look for in a wilderness program;
• The importance of accreditation, transparency, and leadership involvement;
• Why most parents don’t regret intervening, even when the decision feels agonizing;
• The emotional toll on families (and program leaders) during treatment;
• Where wilderness therapy is headed and what the future may look like.

More about Danny Frazer

Danny Frazer has spent nearly 30 years working in wilderness therapy and behavioral healthcare, including co-founding Open Sky Wilderness Therapy in 2006 and serving in leadership roles across the organization. For six of those years, he worked in admissions at Open Sky, speaking with and supporting thousands of families as they navigated the difficult decision of whether residential treatment was the right step for their family. Those conversations deeply shaped how he understands the realities parents face when contending with an at-risk child.

Today, he works as a leadership and business coach, helping leaders in behavioral healthcare navigate these complex, high-stress environments. And, he is an active parent of two boys, including a teenager, an experience that continues to ground his work and perspective.

Looking for support?

🗺️Need help setting healthy boundaries with your teen AND following through? My free guide will help you do so by creating your own Parent Home Plan!

🤍Influence lasting change in yourself and your struggling teen with my private coaching or parent group program specifically created for parents of struggling teens.

Have a question or need support? You can email me at beth@bethhillmancoaching.com

You can support the show by:

Leaving a review

Subscribing to the show

And remember parents, the change begins with us.