Episodios

  • 442: Men, Moral Injury, and Betrayal

    442: Men, Moral Injury, and Betrayal
    Oct 6 2025
    In this episode, Dr. Debi sits down with Tim Wienecke, Air Force veteran, licensed clinician, and host of American Masculinity. Tim brings a rare and necessary perspective on the often-overlooked intersection of men, betrayal, and moral injury—a form of trauma that arises when individuals are forced to act against their own values, often within systems they once trusted. Together, we explore: What moral injury is and how it differs from (yet intertwines with) betrayal trauma. How men process betrayal differently from women, often turning to control or isolation instead of vulnerability. The heavy repercussions of military service, including drone operations, systemic failures, and the lifelong burden of collateral consequences. The side-by-side bonding style of men and why creating safe, non-confrontational spaces is critical for healing. The difference between boundaries and control—and why confusing the two can lead to unhealthy, even abusive, dynamics. How shame operates as a silencer for men and why true healing requires trusted groups who can reflect compassion and accountability. Practical tools for supporting men through betrayal, including reflective listening, meeting them in their own language (emotional, kinetic, or thought-based), and recognizing control behaviors early. Tim also shares deeply personal insights from his own service, how he came to understand moral injury in his work with veterans and first responders, and why America’s conversation around masculinity needs far more nuance than the oversimplified narratives we often hear. Whether you’re a clinician, a partner, or someone healing from betrayal yourself, this conversation opens up vital new ways of understanding how men carry trauma, how it shows up, and what can truly help them heal. Learn More About Tim Wienecke Visit americanmasculinity.com for his counseling services, podcast, and tools designed for men navigating betrayal, moral injury, and masculinity in today’s world. More Resources The PBT Institute: Break free from the pain of betrayal and find safety, love, and trust again. For the betrayed – Reclaim: Heal from your betrayal and take your life back. For the betrayer – Rebuild: Heal yourself and help heal the heart you broke. Take the Post Betrayal Syndrome Quiz – Post-Betrayal Syndrome Quiz
    Más Menos
    29 m
  • 441: Transforming Betrayal into Breakthrough

    441: Transforming Betrayal into Breakthrough
    Sep 29 2025
    From gang life and juvenile detention to martial arts mastery and life coaching - Sensei Dave Armstrong's journey is a testament to human resilience. After facing prostate cancer at 50 and experiencing profound betrayal when his wife of 11 years left during his darkest hour, Dave shares the powerful tools that helped him rebuild and find hope again. Living retired in Greece with an ocean view, he now dedicates his life to helping others transform their trauma into strength. Sensei Dave Armstrong is a resilience coach, martial arts instructor, author, and motivational speaker. Having overcome gang involvement, foster care, juvenile detention, and illiteracy, Dave now lives in Greece and helps others navigate life's most challenging moments. He's the author of "Why Me, My Fight for Life" and holds a degree in psychology. Key Takeaways The Power of Perspective "Why not you?" - We're not exempt from life's challenges, and that's okay Trauma can either define you negatively or fuel your growth - you choose Building internal strength is like developing a muscle - it requires consistent practice Boundaries as Non-Negotiables Clear boundaries prevent neediness from driving poor decisions Some boundaries have no margin for compromise Weak boundaries create unnecessary chaos in your life The Healing Process Don't rush to fill voids with new relationships during healing Allow yourself to feel difficult emotions without forcing solutions Have multiple "tools" ready for different emotional scenarios Building Resilience Through Mentorship Quality mentors can change the trajectory of your entire life Hope is the foundation for all positive change Self-confidence develops through successfully navigating challenges Notable Quotes "I was never hopeless. I was always hopeful. And that's what I try to instill - because even if you don't have the skill sets, there's hope to acquire and change." "We have agency over our response to trauma. Why not choose the positive impact rather than the negative?" "I see the God in everyone. Unfortunately, life will start to hit us and we'll harden our shell. But you can't get out of what you've built to protect yourself." Timestamps [00:00] Introduction to Sensei Dave Armstrong [05:30] Cancer diagnosis and betrayal story [12:15] Childhood trauma and gang involvement [18:45] The mentors who saved his life [25:20] Developing resilience as a skill [32:10] Setting and maintaining boundaries [38:45] The healing journey after betrayal [44:30] Current life philosophy and message Resources Book: "Why Me, My Fight for Life" by Dave Armstrong Website: www.senseidave.com One-on-one coaching: upna.net Instagram: @MrMotivation ThePBTInstitute.com The PBT Institute Certification Program
    Más Menos
    32 m
  • 440: Divorce, Betrayal & Financial Infidelity: How to Protect Your Money and Future After Trust is Broken

    440: Divorce, Betrayal & Financial Infidelity: How to Protect Your Money and Future After Trust is Broken
    Sep 22 2025
    When betrayal and divorce collide, the emotional toll is staggering—but the financial consequences can be just as devastating. In this candid and deeply informative episode, Dr. Debi sits down with financial strategist and divorce expert Gabriella Martinelli to unpack one of the most overlooked yet critical aspects of betrayal recovery: understanding and managing your money when trust has been shattered. With over 20 years of experience in the legal and financial world, Gabriella has guided countless clients through high-stakes divorces—many complicated by hidden spending, concealed accounts, and the gut-punch of financial infidelity. She explains why divorce is not just a legal process, but also a financial untangling that demands clarity, documentation, and strategic thinking—especially when betrayal is part of the story. You’ll learn: The double impact of betrayal and divorce — how emotional pain clouds financial decisions, and why clarity is your most valuable asset. What financial infidelity really looks like — from hidden credit cards and drained savings to funds spent on an affair partner. Why anger-driven decisions can sabotage your future — and how to shift your focus from revenge to building a secure next chapter. The role of mistrust in decision-making — and why even hard data can feel impossible to believe after betrayal. Steps to take immediately — including how to gather financial records, understand your credit report, and identify accounts you didn’t know existed. The importance of a multidisciplinary “divorce team” — legal, financial, and emotional support working together to protect your best interests. Gabriella shares powerful real-life stories—from clients paralyzed by suspicion, to those who risked their future on proving a point, to those who found the strength to pivot toward empowerment instead. She also dismantles the Hollywood myth of “getting your day in court” and the cathartic speech that makes the betrayer pay—revealing the practical reality of how courts actually operate. If you’ve been blindsided by betrayal, are navigating divorce, or suspect financial infidelity, this conversation offers both hard truths and hope. Gabriella and Dr. Debi walk you through the mindset shifts, tactical steps, and strategic support you need to move forward—not just financially stable, but emotionally stronger and in control of your next chapter. Resources: Gabriella’s site: https://www.everafterwealth.com Gabriella’s email: gabriella@everafterwealth.com The 5 Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough: https://thepbtinstitute.com/reclaim The Rebuild Program (For those who betrayed and want to heal): https://thepbtinstitute.com/rebuild/  The PBT Institute Community (Join the healing conversation): https://thepbtinstitute.com  
    Más Menos
    35 m
  • 439: Why Betrayal Lives in the Body—And How to Release It

    439: Why Betrayal Lives in the Body—And How to Release It
    Sep 15 2025
    In this deeply vulnerable and empowering episode, I sit down with author, speaker, and somatic practitioner, Laurie James, to unpack her remarkable journey from decades of nervous system dysregulation to deep, body-based healing. Laurie’s story begins in childhood, where she endured the pain of adoption complexities, sibling abuse, and growing up in a home where she never felt truly safe. These early experiences planted the seeds of hypervigilance, self-worth struggles, and an ongoing search for belonging. Fast forward to adulthood, Laurie faced multiple betrayals in her marriage—one that shook her to her core when her then-husband violated her deepest boundary by contacting her birth mother against her wishes, and another that emerged as a major financial betrayal impacting their family. Layered with years of caregiving for her aging parents, the stress built silently in her body until it erupted as a severe health crisis. Laurie shares openly how chronic stress and unresolved trauma manifested physically—gut issues, anxiety, sleep disruption—and how years of talk therapy alone couldn’t release what was stored in her body. The turning point came when she discovered somatic experiencing—a therapeutic approach that helps release trauma from the nervous system through gentle body awareness practices. In our conversation, Laurie explains: Why trauma lives in the body and can cause chronic dysregulation for decades The physical symptoms and health issues that can stem from betrayal and unresolved trauma How somatic experiencing works and why it was the missing piece in her healing Practical examples of self-regulation tools you can try right now How to build a personalized nervous system regulation toolkit The importance of curiosity, presence, and “nourishing” difficult emotions rather than avoiding them If you’ve ever wondered why you can’t “think” your way out of anxiety, hypervigilance, or betrayal pain—this episode will give you a new perspective and hope. Lourie’s story is proof that even after decades of dysregulation, it is possible to find safety, stability, and healing in your own body again. Resources: Laurie James: https://www.laurieejames.com The 5 Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough: https://thepbtinstitute.com/reclaim/  PBT Certification Info: https://thepbtinstitute.com/get-certified 
    Más Menos
    37 m
  • 438: Writing Your Way Home: Reclaiming Your Voice After Betrayal

    438: Writing Your Way Home: Reclaiming Your Voice After Betrayal
    Sep 8 2025
    In this deeply moving episode, Dr. Debi Silber is joined by author and transformational guide Megan Walrod, whose debut novel It’s Always Been Me is not just a story—it’s a healing journey. What began as a personal process to move through her own betrayal turned into a breathtaking fictional narrative that reflects the five stages from betrayal to breakthrough. Megan shares how writing the character of Sabina, a woman who loses herself while supporting her partner’s dream, became a powerful tool for reclaiming her voice and healing old wounds. Through this conversation, you’ll hear how creative expression, emotional release, and reconnection with intuition can become catalysts for transformation after heartbreak. This episode is a powerful reminder: even when your life doesn’t look like the story you thought you’d live, you can write a new one—and become the main character of your own life. 🧠 What You’ll Learn in This Episode: Why betrayal often invites us to reclaim buried dreams and lost parts of ourselves How writing can be a powerful tool for healing The difference between supporting others and losing yourself How to reconnect with your intuition after it’s been dismissed or doubted Why emotional expression (even messy or angry) is necessary for healing What it means to become the main character of your own life How Megan’s novel It’s Always Been Me mirrors the 5 Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough 📚 About the Guest: Megan Walrod is an author, speaker, and guide who helps women reclaim their voice, write their truth, and live a life aligned with their deepest desires. Her debut novel, It’s Always Been Me, is a fictionalized yet soul-baring exploration of healing after betrayal. The book includes free reflection questions and book group prompts, available at meganwalrod.com/book. 📘 Mentioned in the Episode: Megan Walrod’s novel: It’s Always Been Me. Find it here: https://www.meganwalrod.com/book The 5 Stages from Betrayal to Breakthrough (learn more at thepbtinstitute.com) Painting, journaling, and creative expression as tools for trauma recovery
    Más Menos
    32 m
  • 437: Rebuilding After the Fire: Grief, Identity, and Healing After Betrayal

    437: Rebuilding After the Fire: Grief, Identity, and Healing After Betrayal
    Sep 1 2025
    📝 Episode Summary: In this heart-opening episode, Dr. Debi Silber sits down with PBT® Coach Lisa Teichmiller to explore the essential—but often overlooked—role of grief in the betrayal recovery journey. Lisa shares her personal story of navigating betrayal not just in her marriage, but in her business and identity, offering a raw and relatable testimony of what it takes to truly rebuild from the inside out. Together, Dr. Debi and Lisa discuss: Why grief is not a weakness but a necessary step to healing The emotional weight of betrayal and how it shatters trust and identity The five stages of grief and how acceptance becomes the turning point Why rebuilding your life requires choosing new “bricks” with intention The link between grief, clarity, and designing a life that reflects your worth How journaling can help process suppressed emotions and reconnect with your intuition The importance of safe, supportive spaces in healing—especially when betrayal goes beyond romantic relationships Lisa brings both wisdom and warmth as she explains how honoring grief leads to powerful transformation, and how walking through the fire can uncover who you were truly meant to be. 🔗 Connect with Lisa: The PBT Institute Reclaim Program https://thepbtinstitute.com/reclaim/ 🌐 LisaTeichmiller.com 📸 Instagram: @lisateichmiller 💬 Favorite Quotes: “Your heart is working. That means you're still here—not all is lost.” “Grief is not weakness. It’s clarity, it’s healing, and it’s the foundation of transformation.” “Don’t go to the same brick quarry. You’re building something new.”
    Más Menos
    36 m
  • 436: The Truth About Forgiveness: What It Is, What It Isn’t, and Why It Matters

    436: The Truth About Forgiveness: What It Is, What It Isn’t, and Why It Matters
    Aug 26 2025
    In this powerful episode, Dr. Debi Silber dives into one of the most misunderstood yet essential parts of healing after betrayal: forgiveness. She explores forgiveness from two sides—forgiving ourselves and forgiving others—and unpacks the deep misconceptions that keep people stuck in pain, resentment, and confusion. You’ll learn why forgiveness doesn’t mean reconciliation, how it affects your physical, emotional, and mental health, and why self-forgiveness is just as important—if not more—than forgiving the person who hurt you. Dr. Debi also introduces the Window of Willingness, a framework to help you determine whether it’s safe (or even wise) to rebuild with someone after betrayal. Plus, in honor of National Forgiveness Day (founded by Dr. Debi and held every year on September 1st), you’ll hear about the 21-day forgiveness experience that has helped countless people move from pain to peace. If you’ve been holding on to anger, shame, guilt, or heartbreak—this episode is your invitation to finally let it go. 🔑 What You’ll Learn: The difference between forgiveness and rebuilding Why forgiveness is for you, not them How to know when it’s safe to reconcile What the Window of Willingness tells you about the betrayer’s readiness How self-forgiveness begins the healing process Why cultural pressure to “forgive and forget” often backfires A fresh take on forgiving without enabling 📘 Mentioned in the Episode: Trust Again by Dr. Debi Silber NationalForgivenessDay.com – Join the 21-day Forgiveness Transformation Program 🎁 Ready to Begin Forgiving—On Your Own Terms? Join us for the 21-Day Forgiveness Transformation Program starting September 1st. It’s now a self-paced program filled with inspiration, daily actions, a forgiveness tracker, and powerful stories to support your healing. Sign up at nationalforgivenessday.com What is forgiveness—and what isn’t it? Learn the truth about forgiving yourself and others after betrayal, plus how to know when (or if) to rebuild trust.
    Más Menos
    27 m
  • 435: How Agreeableness Makes You a Target for Narcissists

    435: How Agreeableness Makes You a Target for Narcissists
    Aug 25 2025
    In this powerful episode, Dr. Debi Silber sits down with licensed psychotherapist and author Chelsea Brooke Cole to unpack the intersection of narcissism and agreeableness. Chelsea shares her personal journey through two narcissistic marriages—one with a grandiose narcissist, and the other with a vulnerable one—and how her agreeable nature played a key role in why she stayed. Together, they explore why agreeable people are often targeted, how narcissists think differently, and why healing means reclaiming your empathy without enabling abuse. If you've ever asked yourself, “How did I miss this?”—this episode is for you. What You'll Learn: The difference between grandiose and vulnerable narcissists Why highly agreeable people are prime targets for narcissists How childhood trauma can condition us to "earn" love The five traits of agreeableness and how they impact relationships Why narcissists are wired to exploit what makes you compassionate The myth of changing a narcissist Why awareness, boundaries, and understanding narcissistic thinking are key to healing About Chelsea Brooke Cole: Chelsea is a licensed psychotherapist, author of If Only I’d Known, and expert in narcissistic abuse recovery. She specializes in helping individuals understand the psychology of narcissists, heal from trauma, and build boundaries rooted in clarity, not guilt. Learn more: chelseabrookecole.com Resources: Post Betrayal Syndrome Quiz: https://thepbtinstitute.com/pbs-quiz/ Certification: https://thepbtinstitute.com/get-certified/ For the betrayed – Reclaim: Heal from your betrayal and take your life back. https://thepbtinstitute.com/reclaim/
    Más Menos
    32 m