A Pagan's Nightmare

De: Ray Blackston

Narrado por: George K. Wilson

At first, Lanny Hooch thinks the sign at the gas station is a practical joke: "Unleaded $0.12 per gallon for the Redeemed: $6.66 for everyone else". At McDonald's, he notices crosses on the employees' lapels, and french fries, renamed McScriptures, embossed with Bible verses. And he wonders why everyone calls him "Mr. P". But when he detects changed lyrics in the oldies tunes blaring from his car radio, he realizes something is seriously wrong. The Beatles never sang about wanting to hold someone's tithe! And then there's the huge reward for his capture and conversion.©2006 Charles "Ray" Blackston (P)2007 Recorded Books

Reseñas de la Crítica

"The wide-ranging satire is a breath of fresh air, poking fun at smug evangelicals as well as the bizarre ideas 'unbelievers' entertain about them." ( Booklist)

Cheese, with church buddies.

If you're looking for a drawn out Christian conversion story written from an only-slightly-past-adolescent redneck point of view, then this is your book. The plot is beyond silly. The author also seems to think naming the brand name of everything the characters touch adds 'local color.' It doesn't. Even the 8th time. Character's motivations are entirely one dimensional and unrealistic. The entire book is like a bad after school special. Not recommended for anyone with a functioning brain.

very funny

really love this kind of humor - recommended

A Reader's Nightmare

A Pagan's Nightmare.
I found this book at a library sale, and after listening to it, I'm glad I didn't pay full price.
The reader, George K. Wilson, was fine, he did a good job, I have nothing bad to say about him.
The two tiered story line is fine, too. The way it's written is there are a couple of chapters in the real world, showing the interaction between an agent and the author, and then a couple of chapters of the actual book they are talking about is good. It's a solid story structure, and has been successful at times. I have no problem with that aspect of the book either.
The main problem I have with this book is that it seemed to be written by someone who grew up in an extremely sheltered religious community. And, once grown, has not moved out to experience the real world, yet still believes they know how the real world operates. And I can say this because that's my story, except that I was exposed to the real world when I transferred to, and graduated from, a secular high school.
The premise is that an extreme cult figure disguised as a Christian took over the US one night, and the two in novel MC's, Lanny and Ned, are among the last remaining holdouts. O.k. that's fine, let's see where this goes. They have to separate for a time and when they get back together, they have to determine if each other has been brainwashed or not (logical, no issues there) and the way they do it is that they claim no moral ambiguity about using swear words. But then, neither of them can. Instead of using one little 4 letter word, Lanny has to remember back a few months to when he accidentally drilled into his foot, and try to remember what he said at that point. Are you seriously trying to tell me that you need external stimuli in order to remember English words?
At one point, there are surprised when this cult, who has proven themselves to be able to take over the entire United States overnight to the point where they can change lyrics in songs, are able to take over a theme park.
Throughout the entire story, Lanny is looking for his girlfriend? And at one point early on in the story, he speaks with an airline representative who tells him that the the flight, the best of that his girlfriend was supposed to take was rerouted to Israel, and he still spins the rest of the entire book wondering where she is. She's in f-ing Israel dumb***!
The one part of this book that actually made me laugh, and it really did honestly make me laugh, was when the 2 guys were on the radio trying to convince anyone else who was listening that there were still people who were not brainwashed cultists, and Lanny said that he owned a yacht, and the name of the yacht was the “Drink, Smoke, Cuss” i heard that in busted out laughing.And immediately, I thought to myself: “Okay, I need to buy a yacht, and name it, the “Drink, Smoke, Cuss”!! That was a good one, I'm gonna remember that for a very long time.
After that, they get captured, taken to an internment camp, and escape with three other guys. But all five of them are from major cities, and every last one of them wants to return to their major city of origin. You know, the same places where EVERY SINGLE CITIZEN IS A BRAINWASHED CULTIST.
Yeah, that tracks. ( For all the uninitiated, that sentence was known as “sarcasm”)
Another problem I had was that when they were captured, the security guards did not have weapons of any kind. It was like they just expected the people that they captured to do as they're told, because they were told to do so. The worst part is that's exactly what happened. That's how it went down. These two “fugitives” were caught by unarmed people, and went with them because they were told to do so.
It may be the Gen. X in me, but if you are trying to kidnap me, and you do not have a weapon, We are throwing hands. I'm not saying I will win, but I am not going quietly.
Anyway, while listening to this book, I kept wondering if this was supposed to be satire. But if it was supposed to be satire, it was rather unfunny satire.
Just imagine you and a couple of friends sitting down at lunch. And then another friend comes running up to you all excited. Plops down into a seat, saying: “guys, guys, guys! Carrots are purple!” And then proceeds to laugh so hard that they fall out of their chair and onto the floor.
I wouldn’t be drawn to laugh even at the absurdity of the situation. Part of me would be looking around trying to see if someone is secretly filming a reaction. And part of me would be like: “Wh-, uh, okay…”
Anyway, regardless, I'm still going to name my yacht the “Drink, Smoke, Cuss.”

Funny and fun

This was the first book I downloaded or read by Mr. Blackston. I found it fun and funny, it made me laugh at work which was maybe a bad part of it. Download it and enjoy

Very Entertaining

I was dismayed to see the low rating this book has. I was very entertained, laughed out loud, and was dreading the ending. I loved the style (pithy and smart), subject (a reverse rapture?), and characters. I recommended it to all my family. Ha, Ha, I still think of how funny it is when the pagans are trying to go unnoticed among the Christians so they address people; "Religious howdy". Hilarious.