Dr. Gary Chapman identifies five basic languages of love and then guides couples towards a better understanding of their unique languages of love. Learn to speak and understand your mate's love language, and in no time you will be able to effectively love and truly feel loved in return. Skillful communication is within your grasp!
©2005 Gary Chapman; (P)2005 Oasis Audio LLC
" "Whether your marriage needs a tune-up or a major overhaul, these are powerful prescriptions delivered by a genial, wise man." (AudioFile)
The author has some good messages in this book. Understand what your spouse needs (their particular love language) and communicate with them in that way. (i.e. listen intently to someone who needs to be listened to or touch someone who needs to be touched.) Good premise and presented well.
My only negative would be the last hour being devoted to the writings of Jesus and how they can help your relationship. Can't we leave religion out of these types of books? I will go to my house of worship IF I want to hear religious sermons.
Thus 4 stars. 4 out of 5 hours were good for me.
This book teaches the basic idea of love languages and how they affect our relationships; if you only read one self-help book for marriage, this is the one. We have applied the understanding of the love languages into our marriage and found it very helpful in communicating and understanding each other.
Wonderfully simple, practical concepts that provide us truly effective methods of expressing and receiving love. Any and all relationships could benefit from the information contained in this book. While it is written from a Christian perspective and focuses almost exclusively on married couples experiencing some level of dysfunction in their marriages, the material can be interpreted in any way that best serves your needs. I myself am not a Christian nor am I married, but this has offered wonderful clarity and help to me and my significant other as we co-create the relationship of our dreams together. Hoping to put these lessons to use to set us up for success so we won't need the damage control down the road!
MFT Intern, Indiana I enjoy the perks of technology and Audible as a daily commuter!
I have not, and will not buy the print version. This provided what i considered to be the "lite" version of therapy, which accentuates a "pixie dust" mentality to working on relationships, but it is a good start - but just a good start.
No. I was a little disappointed. Self-help books to me often provide over-simplified solutions to hard questions and situations. I would put this in that subject category, because the author and narrator over-emphasizes positive results. He can do this because he is a therapist who has practiced over 20 years. The best way to learn about relationship and successful marriage and couple therapy, is to be able to show the failures as well as the successes. Gary Chapman chooses to focus 97% of his time on successes.
No i have not, and would not be interested.
I do like the categories, and was able to identify my language and that of my husband's.
As a book for the masses, and a place to start in trying to understand communication difficulties, this book is wonderful, but a little too simplistic. A little over-hyped. I can only imagine a couple coming to therapy mis- "labeling" each other, only adding confusion to the mix. I would skip the first three or four chapters; they are repetitive and sort of blah blah filler material - horrible for a long car trip and rather numbing on a highway. The chapters that actually deal with each of the 5 languages are insightful, and provide some great stories. I enjoyed the Audible book, 'The Greatest Salesman' by Og Mandino more than this book.Many people will like this book, and I know its popular, but consider it only a place to start, not the solution.
Understanding that we all have different ways of communicating and listening has got to help you. Its not a cure-all as promoted, but a methodology. If you are having communcations issues, please do listen and absorb this. Its helps me. I am not much into the some of the religious implications/references that some of these books add in. Its not that there are 5 or 10 or any number of languages, its that you could be missunderstanding the other person and this book can help so go for it.
Why couldn't we all learn about the 5 love languages BEFORE we got married. After a lot of self-learning in 16 years of marriage, this could have saved a lot of difficulty over the years. Don't get me wrong, there's no such thing as a quick fix but the awareness and lessons you pick up by learning the 5 love languages is invaluable for a marriage in any state or stage. The actual reading isn't riviting but Gary does a very good job explaining and providing examples.
Found this book on sale and was in the mood for some 'self-help' inspiration. This book actually provided some thoughtful inspiration ... a different perspective on the way we love. I liked it. Be aware that there is a religious undertone (Christian)- not offensive, but it is a presence. All in all I think this book is well worth the reading. Liked that the principles could be applied in any love relationship , not just for couples but for families and children as well.
This book seems to be written as an attempt to help couples on the rocks save their marriages. If you don't know or understand the basic principals of this book, I highly doubt this will be the fix you are looking for. On the other hand, if you have a good relationship and are looking to make it better, this should help do the trick. Be prepared for the authors strong southern drawl and some cheesy ideas. As with most "how-to" books, personal adaptation is the key.
I'm a writer and a yoga teacher with a Masters in English Literature.
I was wary of the self-help title of the book, but got really turned off when I found out about the extreme American Christianity of the writer. I felt like he was going to sell me something at the end. Maybe my soul back from the devil who stole it.
The narrator was appropriate, he had kind of a Texas accent, adding to the American Everyman vibe I think the book was trying to go for, so I think that was probably a good thing. If you like that sort of thing.
Discomfort and boredom. I like the principle of the book, and perhaps I could have learned something from it if I didn't get so turned off by the gee-golly innocent Christian-ness of the narrator. It just didn't sound like reality. My love tank for this book is empty.
If you are Christian and get something out of self help books, if you think they actually help you and are not a cynical lapsed Christian like me, you might actually enjoy this book and learn something from it. Still, I thought his examples of the things people were going through made the people going through it seem kind of stupid, and I believe anyone who thinks critically and does mindfulness work will figure this kind of stuff out by themselves, rather than labelling everyone's love language and thinking they have it figured out.
"100% think every couple should read this book"
The languages described are so simple and we already use them but maybe no aware of it. The tools can be used in other relationships as well - friendship, with work colleagues, children and basically any human being. Love it!
way too long. he could have shortened the book a bit. too much unneeded details
"Understanding love, yes. Religion, no thanks."
A bit religious in places but otherwise very thought provoking. Definitely makes you a more conscious partner.
"Inspiring talk from a human experience"
This book inspired me to think in a major part of our live
Although still i think there a lot of things that still not covered in husband and wife relation ships.
"Great book for relationships, really helpful."
This book gives really great advice and has really helped my husband and I to understand each other better. The only down sides are the sometimes heavy religious content and the authors somewhat strong southern states accent, which I found occasionally distracting from the actual content.
"Every engaged couple should be given this book"
Then we would see a turn around of divorces. Every Mother In Law should buy one for their engaged couple before they get married. A superb book with great verbal illustrations on how marriages have changed.
"this is so enlightening a must read for any couple"
easy to listen to and very interesting, can't wait to listen to the next book...
In years to come, this will be just accepted as common knowledge. It ought to be, because it's so useful.
A marriage counsellor of many years, Dr Chapman has recognised these patterns of basic emotional need. And it is just that: need; usefully distilling his findings into this book, and identifying these needs as "love languages".
Some of the stories brought me close to tears. Others, laughter. The magical part is the healing that Dr Chapman has brought to thousands of people and the amazing part is that it's pretty simple stuff once it's pointed out. Even when one partner is uninterested and stubborn, the technique can still be employed. This is special stuff.
Here is wisdom which can be applied practically to enable you to make more from your most important human relationship. It is a very good answer to the question "what is love" in usable and applicable terms.
"I wish I had read this book 5 years ago."
I'm giving this to all my friends to listen to or read. Singles, Children and Teens; you're up next.
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