Some people - a sizeable minority - prefer to avoid the limelight, tend to listen more than they speak, feel alone in large groups, and require lots of private time to restore their energy. Often they feel different, not right, less than. But as Marti Olsen Laney proves, that is far from the truth.
The Introvert Advantage dispels common myths about introverts - they’re not necessarily shy, aloof, or antisocial - and explains how they are hardwired from birth to focus inward, so outside stimulation such as chitchat, phone calls, parties, or office meetings can easily become "too much". Most importantly, it thoroughly refutes many introverts’ belief that something is wrong with them. Instead, it helps them recognize their inner strengths - their analytical skills, ability to think outside the box, and strong powers of concentration. It provides tools to improve relationships with partners, kids, colleagues, and friends, while offering dozens of tips, including eight ways to showcase their abilities at work and strategies for socializing. In short, The Introvert Advantage shows introverts how to take advantage of their special qualities not only to survive in an extrovert-oriented world, but to thrive.
©2002 Marti Olsen Laney (P)2013 HighBridge Company
I grew up on Golden Age Radio, and while I love to read, I typically consume more books via audio thanks to a job that lets me listen while I work. As an aspiring writer, I try to read a great deal of non-fiction in addition to a variety of fictional genres. I especially love history, historical fiction, science fiction, fantasy, and old-style gothic horror.
I truly believe this book should be required reading for both introverts and extroverts. More than that, I wish it could be downloaded directly in the minds of many people for maximum effectiveness. Many signals and assumptions that introverts take for granted in an extroverted world are spelled out, analyzed, and made accessible for immediate understanding and integration. For extroverts, the assumptions of the world they've made are challenged, and a new perspectives are offered. The result is genius cleverly disguised as good old common sense. The playing field has been leveled quite effectively, and now the introvert has a fighting chance to proceed in everyday situations according to natural inclination without being subjected to the challenges of misunderstanding, ridicule, or low self-esteem. This book is a bridge. All that remains is for it to be utilized.
Having a psych degree myself I was very familiar with Jung, introverts and extroverts so usually I don't really get anything new out of these books. And being an introvert myself I was really surprised at this book. I hadn't realized the impact on energy. Or rather when she gave more examples of day to day that put it in different perspective. Usually the discussion is more abstract rather than practical daily application.
it really brought home to me my current chronic fatigue. I have an extremely extroverted son and husband. My husband was never a problem because he was independent. Her description of her Vegas trip with her extrovert husband was EXACTLY like mine. I slept while he won money at the casino.
I never really thought about the energy factor though and how it's draining to keep up with an extrovert. My son was highly active even in the womb. And if I didn't wear him out he would not sleep. He and his dad can get about 5 hours of sleep and be bright eyed and bushy tailed. My other son and I need at least 7-8 hours and more alone and quiet time. I was pondering what was wrong with me as we were ending this 7 day a week summer as I allowed my son to be on the swim team, which is 6 days a week, plus work as a life guard, plus volunteer at the zoo. I made him give up his Martial Arts class and drama club until after swim season. But we still ended up with a 7 day a week schedule, with multiple activities some days for the last 5 months. I literally felt like I was going crazy, being tortured and slowly killed all at the same time. If I'd had some time to reflect and recharge I would have realized sooner that I'd never before tried to keep up with an extrovert. My son is only 15 so I have been the mom taxi and have to socialize and be out and about far more than I would have ever dreamed and he is in seventh heaven. He does not feel over scheduled. This is the first time I've let him do so many activities at once. I was sure he'd be overwhelmed by now. Now I realize why he is always so ready to go and he cannot sleep at night if he doesn't swim, work out at the gym or do several hours of his martial arts class. He is the reason he and his brother started swimming on at team at age 5. It was the only sport that had practice 5 days a week and twice in the summer. But, without it he would not sleep.
overall, it was very insightful.
This audiobook gave me some explanations and insight into some of my behavior and feelings that I have wondered about for many years. It is very reassuring that I am not the only one who is wired this way and that there is nothing wrong with not wanting to be as social as society infers.
The idea of introvert and extrovert personalities wasn't new to me, but in the scientific tradition I've been schooled that idea have little or no importance. So I've never really thought about it. This book made me do that. It's not very well written, some of the chapters are actually boring and gave me nothing. But on the whole the book gave me a new perspective on what I already known, some new ways to handle my own life. And that is worth much.
The narration is okay. No more. No less. A book of this kind needs that. So I am glad I listened to it.
Yes, I would recommend it. It helped me understand and feel much better about many aspects of myself and my daughter and husband, all "innies". Helped to give me patience and not feel so worried.
Lots of practical observations that resonate with my everyday life
Yes it did, I just found the narrator's voice a little bit too polished and monotone. But that is probably the innie in me thinking it could have been better.
Not possible, its too long.
A really important read for those who want to have better self understanding and better understanding of their children.
For most of my life until recently reading this book I thought that I was an introvert, it seems I had a misunderstanding of what those character traits really were in a person. One of the major clues of my misunderstanding was the fact that I could just go up to anyone to start a conversation just because they were there. A second is my spontaneity to offer up a little humor off the cuff and out of the blue in a slight devilish way to see a person's reaction.
I grew up in the household of a pastor going to church several days a week while also attending numerous formal gatherings through out the year where I was expected as a child to be very mannerly in my conduct, and was always taught to be reserved with the tongue. So (no pun intended here) I had to contain that devilish side of me which was a learned trait that I had unknowingly carried over into my adult years. It seems according to this book I am really a Right Brained middle of the road Extrovert; you will have to read through the book to know what that means. This book was an eye opener for me into what really defines both groups of people.
this book gives me insight and awareness of how introvert gets their energy. And examples of what can bother introvert or consume their energy. Also tips of what we can do and what to care about and to be careful of. It's filled with reasons to support explanation and i love to listen to it. It makes sense to me and it do me good. It makes me know how i should put myself in my social and everyday life. It answers most of the why in my head and gives out reasons that made me understand myself.
ex: i want to sit in mcdonald restaurant be surrounded by ppl and not talking to them but listen to audiobook. When actually i don't really like to sit out, i rather stay home. But i need reason to be in a restaurant/ in a certain atmosphere. Because sometimes i get lonely but i don't need interaction or worry about my companion feelings.
i love how am being able to reason my act. and what i want and what not and why.
as before i discovered this audio book i'd been having much trouble with myself.
just few more example of how not knowing oneself is an introvert can give trouble
in life. I never know that i was pushing myself into a wrong direction in a fast fwd speed.
I am an introverted artist. I kindda know i am introverted but i never looked it up. I did not understand why i feel like crying and storm only because my dad popped in and start talking to me while i was drawing. I didn't now why i feel that he was very very rude. And why i have to get so emotional about such a simple thing. i hate to react and feel that way.
I have to give up drawing and help out my family business where i have to interact with client and people all day. And i got a friend who literally cry in the phone to get my attention and sometimes took photo of herself with tears and email it to me (people around me find me very comforting to rely onto me over emotional stuffs that's too much that it flat me out most of the time)<< now i learn to be more careful and put limit to it.
My dad loves us to be more open and mingling more with people means more successful opportunity in business to him which i don't have a problem with his thought but i find it hard to swallow. i turned to my parents for emotional fuel which they can never fulfill and i get frustrated and feel betrayed. =='' ( sounds silly but honestly i just have no idea what a better way i can do or even what happened to me and how to put a stop to it.)
i was frustrated i didn't know why i only knew working for people i love (my parents)makes me feel like I'm in hell. But i care so much about work that i have to experience all the details because i am quite a perfectionist. That expose me more to people and clients. And it also tore me more at the same time. By the end of the day i feel like i am less of a human. I didn't know why i exist. I cannot reconnect to my art work coz switching modes seems to be too hard to manage ( but after listening to this book i know how i can do it by sitting silently among people in restaurant with that i don't feel lonely and i can cool down feeling sure that i need no more interaction without feeling guilty after that getting reconnect to my own artistic world just turn on itself like a magic).
I lost everything when I didn't know my limit. I didn't know where to watch for the sign or indicator that i am overly stimulated now and my power dropped. I was disappointed with myself and my life.
appreciation is what i got out of this audio.
thank you for such a great audio.
knowing how i lost my energy and how to refuel it. with tips to do it professionally.
it's more of a rest to sit and listen than reading. coz i need to rest my eyes. and i want to relax seeing people walking around in my free time rather than having my whole waking hours looking at text.
i love the whole thing. it's all so vivid and important and valuable that i want to have them all carefully heard.
thank you very much.
The book puts words to thoughts surrounding the polar opposites of Introvert and Extrovert personalities I've often thought about. The book is written in a familiar tone, making it easy to follow along and the narrator does a nice job carrying that ease of format into her performance.
The book has some nice thought provoking moments where you can actually visualize people you know fitting one or more of the examples given to illustrate specific topics.
Tamara has a good voice for books like this - since this is the first book on this topic I have purchased her narration made it easy to follow along.
No, but again it did provoke thought, which is what I had expected it would.
Good book about a topic often misunderstood.
Concepts and use of examples are really interesting. However, the narrator repeatedly put me to sleep with her monotone voice.
WAY up there. REALLY helped me understand myself and my hubby more.
When I understood why we get "overwhelmed" and how easy it is to pause to recharge the old batteries.
This book did such a great job of letting me "off the hook." Hubby is an extreme introvert and I am mostly an introvert with a couple extroverted veins. It helped me understand why we work so well together as well as why we don't enjoy socializing. We already knew we didn't enjoy it, but now we know why...and that although we are different, we are not "wrong." Hubby has thanked me several times for downloading it and we are each on our second listen.
I didn't see that the "tests" were available in a supplemental pdf. I might be wrong about that, but consider adding them! ;oP
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