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Wallbanger | [Alice Clayton]

Wallbanger

Thanks to paper-thin walls and the guy’s athletic prowess, Carolyn is gaining an - um - intimate knowledge of her new neighbor's nocturnal adventures. And since Caroline is currently on a self-imposed "dating hiatus," and her neighbor is clearly lethally attractive to women, she finds her fantasies keep her awake even longer than the noise. So when the wallbanging threatens to literally bounce her out of bed, Caroline, clad in sexual frustration and a pink baby-doll nightie, confronts Simon Parker, her heard-but-never-seen neighbor.
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Publisher's Summary

The first night after Caroline moves into her fantastic new San Francisco apartment, she realizes she’s gaining an - um - intimate knowledge of her new neighbor’s nocturnal adventures. Thanks to paper-thin walls and the guy’s athletic prowess, she can hear not just his bed banging against the wall but the ecstatic response of what seems (as loud night after loud night goes by) like an endless parade of women. And since Caroline is currently on a self-imposed "dating hiatus," and her neighbor is clearly lethally attractive to women, she finds her fantasies keep her awake even longer than the noise. So when the wallbanging threatens to literally bounce her out of bed, Caroline, clad in sexual frustration and a pink baby-doll nightie, confronts Simon Parker, her heard-but-never-seen neighbor. The tension between them is as thick as the walls are thin, and the results just as mixed. Suddenly, Caroline is finding she may have discovered a whole new definition of neighborly....

In a delicious mix of silly and steamy, Alice Clayton dishes out a hot and hilarious tale of exasperation at first sight...

©2013 Alice Clayton (P)2013 Simon & Schuster

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

3.9 (1244 )
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4.0 (1148 )
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Performance
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  •  
    Jay Vancouver, BC, Canada 06-10-13
    Jay Vancouver, BC, Canada 06-10-13 Member Since 2013
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "A few laughs, mostly just bad..."

    The main character is shallow, materialistic... and mostly just an immature whiny kid.

    The book plays into a lot of negative women stereotypes that I feel we could do without.

    I realize I'm not the target demographic here... I kinda picked this one by mistake... but regardless I thought this one was extremely painful to get through. I kept wanting to reach through the pages and punch the characters in the face.

    12 of 15 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Deborah Oak Park, IL, United States 05-29-13
    Deborah Oak Park, IL, United States 05-29-13 Member Since 2004
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Trite and Boring"

    I'm not sure where all these stellar reviews are coming from but I sure expected more from this book. The characters are really caricatures. Maybe the narration was part of the problem and made the first person story even more banal. So if you enjoy listening to a woman complain about her lack of orgasms for hours, well this is the book for you. I'm sorry I wasted my time on this.

    12 of 15 people found this review helpful
  •  
    creativemom_05 CHAGRIN FALLS, OH, United States 06-14-13
    creativemom_05 CHAGRIN FALLS, OH, United States 06-14-13

    Being a mom, career woman & student (again) I don't have time to read and miss it. Driving to/from work/school is now fun thanks to audible!

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "The cat is the best part of the story..."
    What did you like best about Wallbanger? What did you like least?

    I liked the cat because of his personality. The story had a lot of potential but was a very frustrating listen due to the girl in the story always second guessing herself or being super annoying by over thinking EVERYTHING! Most issues could have been resolved if she'd just communicate! Ugh!

    Otherwise it's a good listen when you don't want to make your brain think.


    What was the most interesting aspect of this story? The least interesting?

    The cat. I found the neighbor's career quite interesting.


    What aspect of Heather Smith’s performance would you have changed?

    She's a bit too breathy. You end up concentrating on her breathing verses reading.


    Was Wallbanger worth the listening time?

    No not really. The story has a great potential if we'd remove the hours of second guessing and overthinking from the main female character. If she would just commuicate her thoughts I think it wouldve been a far more interesting and fun story!

    Premise is good. Had potential.


    8 of 10 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer RUTHER GLEN, VA, United States 05-26-13
    Amazon Customer RUTHER GLEN, VA, United States 05-26-13 Member Since 2011
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Totally hilarious!!"

    This is definitely one of the best books I have listened to lately. So funny but very sexy. The book starts off great and you just can't help but laugh at the situations Caroline hears through her walls. Then her conversations with her friends about what is happening is great. It is nice to hear a sexy book about two fairly normal people instead of two people who have such tragic pasts. This author reminds me a lot of Molly Harper. Tons of funny, laugh out loud parts but she is also good at creating sexual chemistry. The narrator was also very good. She won me over in the first couple scenes where Caroline hears her neighbors wall banging. Totally worth the credit!!! This is one book you will need to remember where you are when listening because you will find yourself laughing out loud on several occasions. My husband laughed at me several times while I was laughing.

    11 of 14 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Katheryne MD, United States 05-27-13
    Katheryne MD, United States 05-27-13 Member Since 2009

    Busy mom who loves to read but doesn't always have the time. I enjoy YA, Romance and the occasional Best Seller.

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "I laughed, I cried, I swooned. Just brilliant!"

    This book has just the right mix of romance and humor. The writing is hilarious and the romance is a nice slow burn. I loved the build up between the two main characters. If you are a romance junkie like me then you will love this one. It's definitely swoon-worthy! I can't wait to read/listen to more books from this author. Just brilliant!

    It's credit worthy and then some.....

    22 of 29 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Karen Oxford, New Zealand 05-20-13
    Karen Oxford, New Zealand 05-20-13 Member Since 2011

    Devotee of multi-tasking, keen gardener and cross-stitcher. Now able to do both AND listen to stories at the same time. Bliss.

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Laugh Out Loud Funny"

    I read this book a while ago and loved it, so snapped it up when I saw it here and am SO pleased I did. Heather Smith is a brilliant narrator and brings the book to life in a way that had me snickering frequently, and hysterically laughing out loud at times. If listening to this on headphones, listen to it alone. Otherwise, people are going to start looking at you funny when you can't control your mirth. Worth a credit? Absolutely! I'd have happily given two credits for this gem.

    16 of 21 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Waverly Texas 06-17-13
    Waverly Texas 06-17-13 Member Since 2011
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "zero plot line"

    Caroline, the main character, lives in San Francisco with "her girls," the three of them friends since their college days at Berkeley. At a housewarming party, they meet guys who went to Stanford. Imagine their surprise when they realize that Simon is the "wallbanger" who lives next door to Caroline, literally shaking the walls as he has raunchy sex with not one but three different women on successive nights. When she couldn't stand it anymore, she'd pounded on his door in the wee hours of the morning, telling him to quiet down... and he tells her that it's his right to do whatever he wants in the privacy of his house. He starts calling her "cockblocker" for interrupting his sex with woman number three. And, because he's a class act, he tells his two buddies all about the episode, referring to Caroline as "pink nightie girl."

    I am not looking for deep philosophy when shopping for escapist reading. But Berkeley, Stanford... and really? Caroline's fabulous career is to make things pretty. She admires her boss because she's soooooo beautiful, and her super successful boss spends time prying for the latest gossip about "wallbanger."

    Because, wouldn't you know, that Simon is a sweet guy.

    And knowing that he's banging the hell out of three other women is obviously no obstacle to obsessing about his body parts and screaming his name in her wet dreams, which he of course hears and smirks about.

    Doesn't this sound like an empowered, happily ever after scenario?

    The bar is set pretty low when the book is about giggling, twirling a strand of hair on your finger, looking down at your pretty bubble-gum pink toenail polish. Using slang that's outdated, and --ooo! texting!

    Seriously, high school romances have more substance than this. I figured by Chapter Seven something would develop in terms of a plot line, but the story is about prude with a cat lusting helplessly for a womanizer. A formulaic reform of the rake isn't enough dramatic tension to me interested. I wish I could get a refund the four hours I spent listening before giving up. Grade: F.

    6 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Crystal Australia 06-13-13
    Crystal Australia 06-13-13 Member Since 2009
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "OH MY GOD I THOUGHT IT WOULD NEVER END!!"

    Dear god i thought this was never going to end *UGH* 13 Hours of utter rambling. Started off ok but should have finished in 5hrs not drawn out and filled with absolute crap to make the 13 hour mark! What a wasted purchase so disappointed.

    6 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Can't just sit and listen VA 06-10-13

    I like to listen while I exercise, do housework, knit, etc., so I usually prefer a light read for an audiobook.

    HELPFUL VOTES
    7
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    "Diabolically bad"
    Would you try another book from Alice Clayton and/or Heather Smith?

    Never again!


    What do you think your next listen will be?

    Colin Firth narration.


    Did Heather Smith do a good job differentiating all the characters? How?

    Usually


    What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

    This book was terribly disappointing. Many reviewers claimed it was funny. It just made me groan it was so trite, so poorly written, and so not funny!


    Any additional comments?

    This book was a huge waste of money. Yes, you should judge a book by its cover. I should have been forewarned by the title that it would be bad, but let other reviewers' comments on its humor sway me. Bad writing is not funny.

    6 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer Australia 01-09-14
    Amazon Customer Australia 01-09-14
    HELPFUL VOTES
    6
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    13
    3
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    "It was good.. and then"
    Would you say that listening to this book was time well-spent? Why or why not?

    It was good time spent until I got to the party where the story line became unbelivable


    Would you be willing to try another book from Alice Clayton? Why or why not?

    Maybe.. not sure


    Any additional comments?

    The story plot started very believable and Caroline was a person who most of us could really relate to.

    Simon's story was also very believable and so was the other friends mentioned in the book.

    Considering that most of the book is about the love story between Caroline and Simon and so much tension was built to get to the point that these 2 get to finally be together, I had to stop reading the booking when they get to Spain

    Oh come on! You don’t build all that sexual tension with someone and then sleep nights together without having sex… and then when things get to heat up Simon get “some” and not Caroline and again sleeping together without “it”!

    I am sorry but this is just too unbelievable for me…. For someone who is without a “O” for so long, you would jump to the opportunity to try to get that “O” back

    Simon was…. very disappointing… first he can’t even get words out of his mouth most of the time and then he let her have her way and don’t reciprocate the pleasure. This is not an alfa male in my opinion and for someone who is a “Wallbanger” with some kinks acts to show off, he can’t show how much he desires Caroline?

    He already told her No when she tried to have some sex before and now that they are all alone in beautful Spain, he can't talk or show her that he is into her?
    It completely put me off the book.

    If the story would just “go with the flow” for the build up sexual tension I would continue listening to this book.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
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