Showing results by author "Nick Offerman"

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    • Bedtime Stories for Cynics

    • By: Nick Offerman, Audible Comedy
    • Length: 2 hrs
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars 1
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 1
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars 1

    If your weary, grownup mind has been searching for a snarkier alternative to your favorite childhood tales, this Audible Comedy series, hosted by Nick Offerman (Parks & Recreation), will scratch that itch – and then some. Enjoy hilarious appearances by the likes of Tommy Chong (Cheech & Chong), Tony Hale (Veep), Patton Oswalt (The Goldbergs), and David Spade (Saturday Night Live).

    Regular price: $24.95

    • Paddle Your Own Canoe

    • One Man's Fundamentals for Delicious Living
    • By: Nick Offerman
    • Narrated by: Nick Offerman
    • Length: 10 hrs and 53 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 7,781
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 7,150
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 7,104

    Growing a perfect moustache, grilling red meat, wooing a woman - who better to deliver this tutelage than the always charming, always manly Nick Offerman, best known as Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson? Combining his trademark comic voice and very real expertise in woodworking - he runs his own woodshop - Paddle Your Own Canoe features tales from Offerman's childhood in small-town Minooka, Illinois, to his theater days in Chicago, beginnings as a carpenter/actor and the hilarious and magnificent seduction of his now-wife Megan Mullally.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Like bacon for your ears

    • By Kyle on 01-03-14

    Regular price: $24.50

    • Gumption

    • Relighting the Torch of Freedom with America's Gutsiest Troublemakers
    • By: Nick Offerman
    • Narrated by: Nick Offerman
    • Length: 11 hrs and 42 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 3,521
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 3,274
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 3,259

    The star of Parks and Recreation and author of the New York Times best seller Paddle Your Own Canoe returns with a second book that humorously highlights 21 figures from our nation's history, from her inception to present day - Nick's personal pantheon of "great Americans".

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • A great series of short biographies.

    • By Nicholas Cottrell on 02-02-16
    • Relighting the Torch of Freedom with America's Gutsiest Troublemakers
    • By: Nick Offerman
    • Narrated by: Nick Offerman
    • Length: 11 hrs and 42 mins
    • Release date: 05-26-15
    • 4.5 out of 5 stars 3,521 ratings

    Regular price: $31.50

    • Good Clean Fun

    • Misadventures in Sawdust at Offerman Woodshop
    • By: Nick Offerman
    • Narrated by: Nick Offerman
    • Length: 6 hrs and 7 mins
    • Abridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 661
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 624
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 617

    Nestled among the glitz and glitter of Tinseltown is a testament to American elbow grease and an honest-to-God hard day's work: Offerman Woodshop. Captained by hirsute woodworker, actor, comedian, and writer Nick Offerman, the shop produces not only fine handcrafted furniture but also fun stuff - kazoos, baseball bats, ukuleles, even mustache combs.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Insightful, Cover to Cover

    • By Rick on 10-22-16

    Regular price: $24.50

    • The Greatest Love Story Ever Told

    • By: Nick Offerman, Megan Mullally
    • Narrated by: Nick Offerman, Megan Mullally
    • Length: 11 hrs
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    At last, the full story behind Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman's epic romance, including stories, portraits, and the occasional puzzle. How did they do it? They came from completely different families, endured a significant age difference, and were separated by the gulf of several social strata. Megan loved books and art history; Nick loved hammers. But much more than these seemingly unsurpassable obstacles were the values they held in common: respect, decency, the ability to mention genitalia in almost any context, and an abiding obsession with the songs of Tom Waits.   

    Regular price: $31.50

    • Ep. 5: The Frog Prince with Patton Oswalt (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Patton Oswalt, Dave Hill
    • Length: 9 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      3 out of 5 stars 4
    • Performance
      3.5 out of 5 stars 4
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars 4

    [Contains explicit content] Patton Oswalt performs an adaptation of the Brothers Grimm classic, “The Frog Prince.” Ours has all the usual ingredients—a frog, a princess, and a touch of magic—but with a few extra elements, like gastrointestinal disorders, classy nicknames, and gratuitous male nudity.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 1: Goodnight Ambien With Wyatt Cenac (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Wyatt Cenac, Jessica Conrad
    • Length: 7 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 11
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 9
    • Story
      4 out of 5 stars 9

    [Contains explicit content] If children's literature is any guide, we should all be able to magically fall asleep simply by saying goodnight to the things we can see from our beds. But any adult knows that our work anxieties and shameful memories would rather stay up all night and chat. Which is why the only viable bedtime routine for weary adults involves a healthy dose of medication.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Test

    • By testbadge on 03-12-18

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 4: Heinz Linge and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day With David Spade (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, David Spade, Matt Lieb
    • Length: 8 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      3.5 out of 5 stars 6
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 6
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars 6

    [Contains explicit content] Things started going bad for Heinz Linge the moment he woke up with gum in his hair. When the day ended, Hitler was dead and Heinz was mopping the floor. As they say, one man's day of victory and liberation is another man's day of rejection by his genocidal dictator best friend.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 7: Todd the Dragon Slayer with Lewis Black (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Lewis Black, Dave Hill
    • Length: 9 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      3 out of 5 stars 4
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 4
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars 4

    [Contains explicit content] The fiery Lewis Black tells an original story by Dave Hill called "Todd the Dragon Slayer." As you can probably guess, it features a dragon. And a guy named Todd. It's totally awesome.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman Take It Slow in Work and in Love

    • By: Alec Baldwin, Megan Mullally, Nick Offerman
    • Length: 49 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 1
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 1
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars 1

    Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman are famous for creating iconic TV characters on two beloved sitcoms, Will & Grace and Parks and Recreation. But they also have a life together off screen.

    Regular price: $0.95

    • Woodsy Bob Newhart

    • By: Judge John Hodgman, Jesse Thorn, Nick Offerman
    • Length: 55 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    This week, Judge John Hodgman and Bailiff Jesse Thorn clear the docket with the help of Deputy Judge Nick Offerman! The Judge, Bailiff and Deputy Judge rule on cocktail drinking etiquette, mail protocol and more! Plus some listener letters regarding previous episodes.

    Regular price: $0.00

    • Ep. 3: Goldilocks with Maria Bamford (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Maria Bamford, Dave Hill
    • Length: 8 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      3.5 out of 5 stars 6
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 6
    • Story
      3.5 out of 5 stars 6

    [Contains explicit content] Maria Bamford brings to life the most adorable home-invasion in history—"Goldilocks." Our version of this classic tale, reimagined by Dave Hill, takes a sober look at this childhood favorite from the perspective that anyone who would break into a family of bears' house, eat their food, destroy their furniture, and mess up their beds must be one serious piece of work.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 11: The Very Thirsty Caterpillar with Phoebe Robinson (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Phoebe Robinson, Guy Branum
    • Length: 10 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      2.5 out of 5 stars 4
    • Performance
      3 out of 5 stars 4
    • Story
      1.5 out of 5 stars 3

    [Contains explicit content] Phoebe Robinson performs "The Thirsty Caterpillar," a modern-day tale of what happens when the desire for fame goes too far. Written by Guy Branum, this story features a larval creature desperate for internet attention and documents her exploits as she transforms into a social butterfly.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 8: The Turtle and the Rabbit with Tommy Chong (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Tommy Chong, Matt Lieb
    • Length: 10 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      2.5 out of 5 stars 2
    • Performance
      3 out of 5 stars 2
    • Story
      2.5 out of 5 stars 2

    [Contains explicit content] Tommy Chong lends his voice to the retelling of Aesop's classic fable, "The Tortoise and the Hare." Our version, written by Matt Lieb, features some familiar elements--like the race--but our animals live in a hippie co-op, where sometimes a race isn't about, like, racing. Right, man?

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 2: Daddies With John O'Hurley (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, John O'Hurley, Sean Keane
    • Length: 9 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      3.5 out of 5 stars 7
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 6
    • Story
      3.5 out of 5 stars 6

    [Contains explicit content] Once upon a time, men had purpose. They were the bacon-winners. They brought home the bread. Their jobs were important and meaningful. But the times, they are a changing. For tonight's edition of Bedtime Stories for Cynics, John O'Hurley teaches the youth about all the important "jobs" that daddies do in these modern times.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 6: The Empress' New Bangs With Natasha Leggero (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Natasha Leggero, Jessica Conrad
    • Length: 11 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      2.5 out of 5 stars 2
    • Performance
      2.5 out of 5 stars 2
    • Story
      2.5 out of 5 stars 2

    [Contains explicit content] The Hans Christian Anderson classic, "The Emperor's New Clothes," touched on some pretty popular fears, but we're digging deeper with our version. We're skipping past trivial things like nakedness or death, because we know the true fear that unites all of humanity - a bad haircut.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 10: Open House With Tony Hale (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Tony Hale, Gretchen Enders
    • Length: 8 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      2.5 out of 5 stars 3
    • Performance
      3 out of 5 stars 2
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars 2

    [Contains explicit content] House shopping can be scary for buyers and sellers alike. Especially if you're touring a house haunted by a history of failed relationships, and your realtor is a creepy Tony Hale.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 9: Casey in the Sack With Nick Thune (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Nick Thune, Matt Lieb
    • Length: 7 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      1 out of 5 stars 1
    • Performance
      1 out of 5 stars 1
    • Story
      1 out of 5 stars 1

    [Contains explicit content] Did you know that the classic poem "Casey at the Bat" has an epilogue? Turns out the infamous Casey is quite the lothario, thanks to his baseball superstar status. Nick Thune brings all the juicy details to life.

    Regular price: $2.99

    • Ep. 12: Caramello with Brent Weinbach (Bedtime Stories for Cynics)

    • By: Nick Offerman, Brent Weinbach
    • Length: 8 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      3 out of 5 stars 2
    • Performance
      3 out of 5 stars 2
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars 2

    [Contains explicit content] It's every Southern Californian teenager's dream, right? Ride in a banged up Toyota hatchback to a divey night club, meet a real-life Arabian prince, and get rescued from your life of toilet scrubbing. In this episode of Bedtime Stories for Cynics, Brent Weinbach creates a modern-day version of "Cinderella," set in Los Angeles.

    Regular price: $2.99