Showing results by author "Dave Barry"

In an evocative and fast-paced adventure on the high seas and on a faraway island an orphan boy named Peter and his mysterious new friend, Molly, overcome bands of pirates and thieves in their quest to keep a fantastical secret safe and save the world from evil.

Peter leaves the relative safety of Mollusk Island - along with his trusted companion, Tinker Bell - for the cold, damp, dangerous streets of London. On a difficult journey across the sea, he and Tink discover the dark and deadly slithering part-man/part-creature Lord Ombra, who is intent on recovering the missing starstuff.

Peter and Molly find themselves in the dangerous land of Rundoon, ruled by the evil King Zarboff, who takes great delight in watching his pet snake, Kundalini, consume anyone who displeases him.

The year is 1902 - it's been 23 years since Peter and the Lost Boys returned from Rundoon. Since then, nobody on the island has grown a day older, and the Lost Boys continue their friendship with the Mollusk tribe and their rivalry with Captain Hook. Meanwhile, in London, Molly has married George Darling and is raising three children: Wendy, Michael, and John. One night, a visitor appears at her door; it's James, one of Peter's original Lost Boys.

In this hilarious novel, written in the voice of eighth-grader Wyatt Palmer, Dave Barry takes us on a class trip to Washington, DC. Wyatt, his best friend, Matt, and a few kids from Culver Middle School find themselves in a heap of trouble - not just with their teachers, who have long lost patience with them - but from several mysterious men they first meet on their flight to the nation's capital.

An uproariously funny examination of what one generation can teach to another - or not - from the Pulitzer Prize winner and New York Times - best-selling author of You Can Date Boys When You're Forty and Insane City. During the course of living (mumble, mumble) years, Dave Barry has gained much wisdom* (*actual wisdom not guaranteed), and he is eager to pass it on - to the next generation, the generation after that, and those idiots who make driving to the grocery store in Florida a death-defying experience.

Last year, Wyatt Palmer was the hero of middle school, having foiled a plot against the president of the United States. But now he and his friends are in Coral Cove High School - home of the Fighting Conchs - and Wyatt is no longer a hero: He's just another undersized freshman, hoping to fit in, or at least not be unpopular. Things start to go wrong when Matt Diaz, who is Wyatt's best friend but also unfortunately an idiot, decides to bring his pet ferret, Frank, to school.

A chain of events that will change the lives of each and every character will leave some of them wiser, some of them deader, and some of them definitely looking for a new line of work. With a wicked wit, razor-sharp observations, rich characters, and a plot with more twists than the Inland Waterway, Dave Barry makes his debut a complete and utter triumph.

We never know what will happen next in Florida. We know only that, any minute now, something will. Every few months, Dave Barry gets a call from some media person wanting to know, "What the hell is wrong with Florida?" Somehow, the state's acquired an image as a subtropical festival of stupid, and as a loyal Floridian, Dave begs to differ. Sure, there was the 2000 election. And people seem to take their pants off for no good reason. And it has flying insects the size of LeBron James. But it is a great state, and Dave is going to tell you why.

Some people may wonder what this subject has to do with Dave Barry, since Dave's struggled hard against growing up his entire life-but the result is one of the funniest, warmest, most pitch-perfect books ever on that mystifying territory we call "adulthood".

Aidan and Sarah Cooper have no idea what they’re getting into one afternoon when they discover a mysterious coded document in a secret compartment of an antique English desk their father recently bought at an auction. Something about the document seems familiar to Sarah, and that night she realizes what it is: the document seems to be referring to some books she has read - the Starcatchers series, about the origin of Peter Pan. But how could that be? The document seems far older than the books. And of course, the books are just stories....

Little Scallop should be happy. She's a princess of the Mollusk tribe, rulers of beautiful Mollusk Island. And she has two fun friends - Aqua and Surf - who just happen to be mermaids.

Seth Weinstein knew Tina was way out of his league in pretty much any way you could imagine, which is why it continued to astonish him that he was on the plane now for their destination wedding in Florida. The Groom Posse had already sprung an airport prank on him, and he'd survived it, and if that was the worst of it, everything should be okay. Smooth sailing from now on. Seth has absolutely no idea what he's about to get into.

When an earthquake strikes Never Land Island, things begin to go terribly wrong. A mysterious barrel washes ashore and falls into the hands of Captain Hook, who hatches an evil plan.

The Extravaganza of the Seas is a 5,000 ton cash cow, a top-heavy tub whose sole function is to carry gamblers three miles from the Florida coast, take their money, then bring them back so they can find more money.

Philip Horkman is a happy man - the owner of a pet store called The Wine Shop, and on Sundays a referee for kids' soccer. Jeffrey Peckerman is the sole sane person in a world filled with goddamned jerks and morons, and he's having a really bad day. The two of them are about to collide in a swiftly escalating series of events that will send them running for their lives, pursued by the police, soldiers, terrorists, subversives, bears, and a man dressed as Chuck E. Cheese.

If you loved Dave Barry's Greatest Hits, you'll love hearing him explain the stark reality of modern relationships. Find out how to get along with your mother-in-law - your best bet is drugs, and the meaning of dating - going out with a potential mate and doing a lot of fun things that the two of you will never do again if you actually get married.

While Peter is away from the island, James and the other Lost Boys discover a mysterious cave. Shining Pearl and her sister, Little Scallop, warn the boys that the cave is a dangerous place, inhabited by a creature known as the Goat Taker - a beast so scary that even the Mollusk tribe fears it. But the boys can't resist trying to discover the cave's secrets.

Toby Harbinger, an eighth grader at Hubble Middle School near Washington, D.C., is in big trouble. He made the mistake of selling his dad's priceless original Star Wars blaster to a lunatic who thinks he's Darth Vader and travels with a large, hairy sidekick known as the Wookiee. Now the lunatic wants more from Toby, whose only hope of getting out of this mess is to win first prize at the school science fair: $5,000.

If you've ever suffered through a Passover Seder, you're well aware of the fact that the entire evening can feel like we're still in bondage. There are endless stories, frequent hand washing, and not enough eating. The book you hold before you is no ordinary Haggadah. For This We Left Egypt? is a hilarious and entertaining parody from the comedic minds of Dave Barry, Alan Zweibel, and Adam Mansbach.