
There and NEVER, EVER Back Again
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Narrado por:
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Jordan Reader
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De:
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Jeff Mach
"There is a white wizard, cloaked in spellcraft and guile and a truly astonishing sense of self-righteousness, and he simply will not stop slaughtering The Chosen One until he kills me."
Set in a fantasy world of unmanageable magics and questionable cosmology, There and NEVER, EVER Back Again: A Dark Lord's Journal is the peculiar, blackly satirical tale of the Dark Lord, who is amassing an army of Things of the Night, and awaiting likely death at the hands of:
The Elves: A beautiful, shiny, sociopathic species whose language is entirely sarcasm.
The Dwarves: Doomed hammer-swinging dwellers of the underground.
The Armies of Man: No one tells a better tale, or causes a more rapid extinction.
The White Wizard: Embodiment of all that is good and right; just ask him.
....and
The Chosen One: Victim - sorry, meant to say "Hero" - of a glorious prophecy. The Chosen One is destined to bring down the Dark Lord, if not killed first. In which case, The White Wizard will have to find a replacement. Again.
Behold! A (relatively) epic narration of world-changing events, told from the point of view of the Dark Lord. 'Tis a story of shattering destiny, drinking, arcane secrets, drinking, and battles worth of the Sagas. Well, not the Sagas of Men, but the Orcs have probably got something to say about it. Let's get going; it's time to steal the Sun.
There and NEVER, EVER Back Again is the first novel by Jeff Mach, playwright, event creator, and certified Dark Lord.
©2019 Jeff Mach (P)2019 Jeff MachListeners also enjoyed...




















You will love it or will hate it
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Nice story, wrong narrator
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And I honestly can't imagine anyone listening to part of Jordan's delivery and not wanting to hear the rest of it.
I may be biased, but I loved it.
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a good story.
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It was good probably a better to read it
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Awesome
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El oyente recibió este título gratis
Grab It
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Expand your mindfulness. Definitely a worthwhile read...
NOTE REGARDING THE 1-STAR REVIEWS - there is a group of individuals out there (whom I have discovered through research on the author) have a personal vandetta against the writer. You will note that most of the 1-star reviews are NOT verified purchasers, but random (and sometimes anonymous) reviews from trite, childish, cowardly individuals who have not even purchased let alone read this book, but who are set out to effect this author's reputation.
I take great exception to this practice if for no other reason than it attempts to nullify the opinions by those of us who have purchased and have taken the time to read this work. I do not like bullies, regardless of the context.
If you are one who reads reviews like I am, please take into consideration the validity of the review, particularly those that don't even reference the contents of the book. I assure you, if you read the reviews intelligently enough, you can spot the ones who are not intelligent enough to have even read the book. Thank you.
So good, I bought the hardcopi then the audio book
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Great Deal
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Unfortunately, I was unable to continue listening, as the random errors in the recitation, bizarre emphasis, and mispronunciation of certain words made it difficult to even follow the story for long.
The story is delightful, narrator needs work
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