Katherine Spearing has spent years listening to the stories most churches would rather stay silent about. As the founder of Tears of Eden, she works directly with survivors of spiritual abuse, helping people untangle trauma, reclaim autonomy, and rebuild trust in themselves after systems of faith have caused harm. Her work centers on the lived realities of abuse, power, and control inside religious spaces—and what it actually takes to heal on the other side.

A Certified Trauma Recovery Practitioner with a master’s degree in Religion and Cultures, Katherine also hosted the groundbreaking podcast Uncertain for five seasons, creating space for long-overdue conversations about abuse in churches. Her book, A Thousand Tiny Paper Cuts: The Subtle, Insidious Nature of Spiritual Abuse and Life on the Other Side, explores the subtle, insidious nature of spiritual abuse and the slow, courageous work of recovery.

FIND KATHERINE SPEARING:

Follow at www.katherinespearing.com; Instagram @katherinespearing; Facebook @spearingkatherine

ABOUT S&P HOST JANICE SELBIE, MPCC:

Janice is a clinical counsellor, religious trauma recovery coach, and the best-selling author of Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook: https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo. In addition to private practice, Janice is the founder of the Conference on Religious Trauma (CORT), and the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture Conference. Learn about her free, online support group here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/free-religious-trauma-support-group. Her other podcast is called Divorcing Religion: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/religious-trauma-podcast. The ULTIMATE Deconstruction Guide and Workbook is available now: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/product-page/the-ultimate-deconstruction-guide-and-workbook.

FIND JANICE: DivorcingReligion.com; Instagram @divorcingreligion ; Threads @divorcingreligion

Support the show

FIND JANICE:

Janice Selbie's best-selling book, Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook, is available here: https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo

Religious Trauma Survivor Support Groups happen online Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern. Don’t miss this opportunity to connect with others for support: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

Need help on your journey of healing from Religious Trauma? Book a free 20-minute consultation with Janice here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/

Follow Janice and Divorcing Religion on Social Media: https://linktr.ee/janiceselbie

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular mental health clinician.

The views expressed by guests on the Sex & Power Podcast are not necessarily held by the host.

Support the show

Sex & Power: Chris Tompkins - The Truth About Shame: Chris Tompkins on Love, Liberation, and LGBTQ Resilience

Chris Tompkins is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who specializes in working with adult gay men. He is also the author of the APA award-winning book Raising LGBTQ Allies: A Parent’s Guide to Changing the Messages from the Playground. Chris has a Master of Arts in Clinical Psychology from Antioch University, with a specialization in LGBTQ Affirmative Psychology. In addition to being a therapist, Chris is a writer and public speaker. His work has been featured on TEDx, NBC, HuffPost, Psychology Today, The Advocate, and more.

Today, Chris shares his experiences growing up with non-affirming religion and the shame that it caused him as he recognized his same-sex attraction. From first romantic experiences to coming out to family, Chris candidly discusses his journey, highlighting the normalcy of curiosity and the power of self-compassion.

FIND CHRIS:

https://linktr.ee/aroadtriptolove?utm_source=linktree_profile_share

FIND JANICE:

Janice Selbie's best-selling book, Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook, is available here: https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo

Religious Trauma Survivor Support Groups happen online Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern. Don’t miss this opportunity to connect with others for support: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

Need help on your journey of healing from Religious Trauma? Book a free 20-minute consultation with Janice here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/

Follow Janice and Divorcing Religion on Social Media:

https://linktr.ee/janiceselbie

The Sex & Power Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular mental health clinician.

The views expressed by guests on the Sex & Power Podcast are not necessarily held by the host.

Support the show

Clara Ritger spent her 20s building a successful media career — producing for U.S. national media such as NBC, WSJ, and TLC — while secretly battling chronic illness and burnout. A ruptured appendix, major abdominal surgery, and skin cancer forced her to reevaluate everything. In this episode, Clara shares how she burned it all down, why rest and healing are radical acts, and what she’s learned about choosing alignment over performance.

FIND CLARA:

Clara Ritger is a writer, trauma-informed meditation teacher, and inspirational speaker. Follow her on Threads and Instagram @clararitger. Her newsletter Adventure to Awaken adventuretoawaken.com shares insights and perspective shifts from the journey to come home to yourself. Get Clara Ritger’s free, 56-page guide to taking a solo retreat here: http://adventuretoawaken.com/solo-retreat-guide

FIND JANICE:

Janice Selbie's best-selling book, Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook, is available here: https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo

Religious Trauma Survivor Support Groups happen online Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern. Don’t miss this opportunity to connect with others for support: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

Need help on your journey of healing from Religious Trauma? Book a free 20-minute consultation with Janice here: https://www.divorcing-religion.com/

Follow Janice and Divorcing Religion on Social Media:

https://linktr.ee/janiceselbie

The Sex & Power Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular mental health clinician.

The views expressed by guests on the Sex & Power Podcast are not necessarily held by the host.

Support the show

The Sex & Power Podcast: Truth-telling that liberates with Mike Steve Collins: The Anti-Civil Rights Movement

Mike Collins is the author of The Anti-Civil Rights Movement: Affirmative Action as Wedge and Weapon (University Press of Kansas, 2024), Understanding Etheridge Knight, updated edition (University of South Carolina Press, 2023), and The Traveling Queen (poems, Sheep Meadow Press, 2013). His essays have appeared in Harper’s Magazine, The Oxford American, The Cambridge Companion to American Prison Writing and Mass Incarceration, Fight & Fiddle, Callaloo, PMLA, and elsewhere. His poems have appeared in New Letters, About Place, 32 Poems, The Rupture, JAMA, The American Journal of Poetry, and elsewhere. He teaches at Texas A & M University.

https://kansaspress.ku.edu/9780700637140/

Our conversation today focuses on his recent book The Anti-Civil Rights Movement: Affirmative Action as Wedge and Weapon, where Mike examines how policies created to promote opportunity and fairness were slowly reshaped into tools that divided the very groups they were meant to empower.
FIND MIKE on TikTok @mike.steve.collins

FIND JANICE SELBIE:
Janice Selbie's best-selling book, Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook, is available here. https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference 2025 available here. https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/

Religious Trauma Survivor Support Groups happen online Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern. Sign up here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

For help with recovery from religious trauma, book a free 20-minute consultation with Janice here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

Follow Janice and Divorcing Religion on Social Media:
linktr.ee/janiceselbie

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician. The views expressed by guests are not necessarily held by the host.

Support the show

Detra Denise - Ashes and Embers: How Detra Denise Turned Pain into Power PART 2

In this episode, Detra shares what it was like to go from obscurity to fame after being featured in a 15-part series in the Humans of New York. She also opens up about being offered protection by the gents of the Harlem Cigar Room, and what kept her moving forward instead of giving up.

DETRA’S LINKS:

http://www.detrasstory.com/

https://www.instagram.com/onewomannyc1?igsh=MWl2cDB2ZWptYmRlMA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr

https://www.facebook.com/detra.denise.52

https://youtu.be/gj4alIQTka4?si=VD1hLyzE8iztnBd9

FIND JANICE SELBIE:
Janice Selbie's best-selling book, Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook, is available here. https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference 2025 available here. https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/

Religious Trauma Survivor Support Groups happen online Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern. Sign up here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

For help with recovery from religious trauma, book a free 20-minute consultation with Janice here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

Follow Janice and Divorcing Religion on Social Media:
linktr.ee/janiceselbie

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician. The views expressed by guests are not necessarily held by the host.

Support the show

Detra Denise - Ashes and Embers: How Detra Denise Turned Pain into Power PART 1

Content Warning: CSA, suicidality, familial estrangement

My guest today is Detra Denise, a former pastor's wife who dared to change her life in unimaginable ways. After leaving her toxic marriage, Detra moved to New York City to start over. Thanks to both her love of connecting with people and her musical and storytelling skills, Detra built an exciting and meaningful new life for herself—and was featured in Brandon Stanton's "Humans of New York" along the way!

From writing and performing her own one-woman musical show to creating her own premium cigar line, Detra's story of resilience is powerful and deeply moving.

DETRA’S LINKS:

http://www.detrasstory.com/

https://www.instagram.com/onewomannyc1?igsh=MWl2cDB2ZWptYmRlMA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr

https://www.facebook.com/detra.denise.52

https://youtu.be/gj4alIQTka4?si=VD1hLyzE8iztnBd9

FIND JANICE SELBIE:
Janice Selbie's best-selling book, Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook, is available here. https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference 2025 available here. https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/

Religious Trauma Survivor Support Groups happen online Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern. Sign up here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

For help with recovery from religious trauma, book a free 20-minute consultation with Janice here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

Follow Janice and Divorcing Religion on Social Media:
linktr.ee/janiceselbie

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician. The views expressed by guests are not necessarily held by the host.

Support the show

This week on the Sex & Power Podcast, I'll be speaking with Kiki Negress, The Uppity Negress.

Kiki Bryant is known across platforms as the Uppity Negress: a brilliant, incisive voice on race, feminism, religion, and culture. She is also an entrepreneur and creator. In this episode, Kiki shares about the painful childhood that helped shape her bold, intersectional style of truth-telling. Join us to learn what she wishes white feminists would understand about allyship and power dynamics, and a whole lot more.

FOLLOW KIKI

https://uppitynegress.com/

https://www.threads.com/@uppity_negress_

https://www.instagram.com/uppity_negress_/

FIND JANICE SELBIE:
Janice Selbie's best-selling book, Divorcing Religion: A Memoir and Survival Handbook, is available here. https://amzn.to/4mnDxuo

Recordings from the Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture conference 2025 available here. https://www.shamelesssexuality.org/

Religious Trauma Survivor Support Groups happen online Tuesdays and Thursdays at 5pm Pacific/8pm Eastern. Sign up here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

For help with recovery from religious trauma, book a free 20-minute consultation with Janice here. https://www.divorcing-religion.com/services

Follow Janice and Divorcing Religion on Social Media:
linktr.ee/janiceselbie

The Divorcing Religion Podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you need help with your mental health, please consult a qualified, secular, mental health clinician. The views expressed by guests are not necessarily held by the host.

Support the show