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Publisher's Summary

A New Resource for Those Experiencing Loss

With It's OK That You're Not OK, Megan Devine offers a profound new approach to both the experience of grief and the way we help others who have endured tragedy. Having experienced grief from both sides - as both a therapist and as a woman who witnessed the accidental drowning of her beloved partner - Megan writes with deep insight about the unspoken truths of loss, love, and healing. She debunks the culturally prescribed goal of returning to a normal, "happy" life, replacing it with a far healthier middle path, one that invites us to build a life alongside grief rather than seeking to overcome it.

On this unabridged audio recording read by the author, Megan offers stories, research, life tips, and creative and mindfulness-based practices to guide us through an experience we all must face. With Megan's gentle but direct guidance, you'll learn:

  • Why well-meaning advice, therapy, and spiritual wisdom so often end up making it harder for people in grief
  • How challenging the myths of grief - doing away with stages, timetables, and unrealistic ideals about how grief should unfold - allows us to accept it as a mystery to be honored instead of a problem to solve
  • Practical guidance for managing stress, improving sleep, and decreasing anxiety without trying to "fix" your pain

Many people who have suffered a loss feel judged, dismissed, and misunderstood by a culture that wants to "solve" grief. Megan writes, "Grief no more needs a solution than love needs a solution." It's OK That You're Not OK is a book for grieving people, those who love them, and all those seeking to love themselves - and each other - better.

©2017 Megan Devine (P)2017 Sounds True

What members say

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Transfigurative treatise on grief

This audio book is articulated with poignant authenticity. It is a seminal work on living with tragic loss. It has personal reflection, research, powerful quotes, and useful activities. I highly recommend this book. I plan to listen to it often. Thank-you!

8 of 8 people found this review helpful

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someone understands

this book is a beautifully understanding and gentle reminder that grief is not something you just get over. it has brought me comfort and helped me with some ways I can move forward with my grief.

6 of 6 people found this review helpful

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By far the best "grief" book

I lost my triplets 5 months into my pregnancy about 4 1/2 years ago. I've read many of books, listened to podcasts, gone to group and private counseling, but this book said it all. I grasped every word and related to every feeling. Grief cannot be healed, it will always exist. Reducing the suffering is the only thing we can control and even that takes times. Allowing one's self to be okay with not being okay is very freeing.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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From a broken heart

This book has helped me with the loss of my daughter. It is a suggested must read for those that grieve

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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THANK YOU

The is by far the best book I have read on profound loss.
Finally, a place to find validation and some measure of peace in my truth, without being told how to "fix" my pain, but instead showing me how to live within it, through it.
A million thanks to the author for giving all of us this rare and precious place, this refuge from the well-meaning but clueless masses.
Thank you.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Thank you!

She really got it. All the sad and ugly truth of losing someone. I’m really glad I found this book.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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real grief for real people

Megan lends invaluable insight into the world of grief and why it can make us feel so crazy. This book will revolutionize your experience and understanding of our cultural model of grief, how simple tending and pure acceptance is often withheld. You are ok, however you are not ok - feel that, take it in, know you are not alone in tending your loss and new life with Megan, this wonderful book and the brave community of the grief revolution as companions.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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It’s OK - simple as that

I never do book reviews, but this extraordinary piece of kindness that I randomly stumbled upon definitely deserves one. For me, giving myself the simplest validation - it’s OK that you’re not OK - is priceless.

I am a psychologist and I am personally affected by grief. I have a degree that is completely useless to me when facing the reality of loss. But that’s the way we are taught. In desperation to understand myself and to learn how to contain the magnitude of my feelings I read most of the very little that is available on this topic. Useless theories, stages and disorders. I’ve also been fed with much of the current mindfulness and positivity nightmare. Our culture does not only not understand, it is also silent. Grief is uncomfortable so let’s just get it over with quickly. Ignorance hurts. Platitudes hurt. Forced positivity hurts. Unlike any other book, It’s OK That You’re not OK normalizes what is in our society wrongly pathologized in people who are in their most vulnerable state. The author is generous with her own experience, doesn’t avoid what is difficult and describes grief with its raw ugliness instead of trying to paint artificial rainbows all over it. You won’t find empty words of advice, no easy steps to grant your way “back to normal”. But it may become your guide to simply learning to be with what is yours to be with.
This should be a mandatory read for everyone who hasn’t been touched by a great loss yet. And it is a very gentle and validating read for those who have. If you are struggling, reading this book may be just the act of kindness you can show yourself.

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Completely wonderful!

This book is not your typical book about grief. It teaches us how to deal with it better without all the rah-rah stuff involved. It is allowing you for once to feel your pain as if it is heard because our society does not give us permission to feel sad. Society teaches us that we have to be everything else, but we are actually feeling. Here is the simple truth: it is OK to be NOT be OK. We are allowed to process our feelings in our own time and accept the events that happened to us in our own time. This book is beautifully written. I would give it to anyone who like myself experienced loss in any capacity.

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Thank you Megan

I've already shared it with three of my closest friends, one also grieving like me and two supporters. It was so easy to understand and it validated each and everyone of my concerns on grieving, being supported and feeling the way I feel. I'll be listening to it a few more times for sure.

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  • Donnocha
  • 10-30-17

Wise & compassionate

A wise and compassionate book. Well read. Useful for anyone who has been bereaved, and for those who support them.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 02-24-18

Well meaning intentions but lecturing

Some empathy. Narrator's deliberate pauses made it sound insincere. Lecturing in places. Unhelpfully spiritually cynical.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 02-04-18

Very Thankful for this book

The Author’s goal is to give companionship in such tragic times, and she does that with flying colors. A realist and doesn’t give false hope, but really Strategies in knowing it’s ok not to be ok.

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  • Claire Martenson
  • 11-23-17

Excellent!

I bought Megan's book on audible because I had family members experience grief and loss and I wanted to be able to help them the best I could.
I found Megan's book just beautiful.
She has such a compassionate and empathetic voice and on several occasions I was brought to tears. I have learned so much from her book and have already notice positive changes for my new management of grief. Thank you, Meghan! Your friend.