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Don't Call It an Invasion
- Narrated by: Jason Keller
- Length: 6 mins
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Don't Call It an Invasion
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Like a fresh cranberry-orange nut muffin w/ fudge
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Short but adorably sweet 💙💜💚
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Publisher's summary
You can listen to this science fiction story for free on your device with the Audible Stories Skill. Just say “Alexa, read me a sci-fi story,” or “Alexa, read me a story” to hear more free genres.
Aliens searching for a new home planet have studied humans through the “archives” they’ve discovered, specifically, Hollywood musicals. They arrive on Earth ready to integrate with the world through song, but find the world does not greet them the way they expect. Think Galaxy Quest with musicals!
Veronica Bane is a writer and ghostwriter who has worked with both indie and Big 5 publishers on multiple genres.
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-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 585
It’s the summer of ’77 in New York City, and the only thing more unnerving than the scorching heatwave is the rampant murder, leaving washed-up homicide detective Richard Dietrich on edge. When Dietrich investigates a brutal mob hit the brass doesn’t want him to solve, he goes from phoning it in to getting in over his head. Caught up in a mysterious second homicide with an even more perplexing perpetrator, Dietrich starts to second guess his instincts—and his memory—as he searches for answers at the bottom of a bottle.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Haunting ending
- By Shirley Anderson on 04-21-24
By: Don Winslow
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The Rip
- By: Holly Craig
- Narrated by: Carly Foxx, Shalom Brune-Franklin
- Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,450
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,427
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Story4 out of 5 stars 1,427
Luxury villas on hot white sand, views for miles over turquoise water. Flawless hostess Penny gathers guests to an island for her husband’s birthday celebrations. But she soon regrets inviting self-obsessed Eloise. When a child vanishes on the night of the party, their perfect island weekend is ripped apart. Even paradise harbours murky secrets… Has he been taken? Has he drowned? In the panic to find any trace, Penny casts about for someone to blame—even if that person is her own daughter, Rosie. Even clear waters descend to pitch black.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Intriguing, Engaging, AND BEST NARATORS EVER
- By Hadassah on 03-12-24
By: Holly Craig
-
The Holy Bible: King James Version
- The Old and New Testaments
- By: King James Bible
- Narrated by: Scott Brick, Prentice Onayemi, Ellen Archer, and others
- Length: 82 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 999
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 791
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 784
This newer edition of the King James Bible published in 1769 is usually preferred by most that read it over the older 1611 version. This 1769 edition is highly sought after due to being more reader/listener friendly than the 1611 since many typos were fixed.... We hope your new audio bible will go everywhere with you and be a blessing for years to come.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Very Good
- By José de Ribera on 12-17-20
By: King James Bible
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He Who Fights with Monsters 2
- A LitRPG Adventure (He Who Fights with Monsters, Book 2)
- By: Shirtaloon, Travis Deverell
- Narrated by: Heath Miller
- Length: 22 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 26,172
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 22,974
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Story5 out of 5 stars 22,919
But Jason Asano is settling into his new life. Now, a contest draws young elites to the city of Greenstone to compete for a grand prize. Jason must gather a band of companions if he is to stand a chance against the best the world has to offer. While the young adventurers are caught up in competition, the city leaders deal with revelations of betrayal as a vast and terrible enemy is revealed. Although Jason seems uninvolved, he has unknowingly crossed the enemy’s path before.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Contrary to common reviews
- By Karen on 05-21-21
By: Shirtaloon, and others
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Point Nemo
- By: Jeremy Robinson
- Narrated by: R.C. Bray
- Length: 9 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 448
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 436
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Story5 out of 5 stars 436
In the heart of the South Pacific lies Point Nemo, the most desolate and remote place on Earth. At its core is a dead zone, devoid of life, where government agencies crash their obsolete satellites and space stations, confident they won't harm a soul. When the International Space Station suffers a catastrophic failure and plummets through the atmosphere, it's here that Mission Specialist Julie Rohr, an astrobiologist studying living space dust called xylem, finds herself marooned. Julie's only hope for rescue lies in the hands of her estranged father, Dr. Finn Maddern, a renowned mycologist.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Totally original-totally feasible!
- By Lawrence Tate on 04-10-24
By: Jeremy Robinson
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You Shouldn’t Have Come Here
- By: Jeneva Rose
- Narrated by: Andrew Eiden, Andi Arndt
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 3,869
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 3,740
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 3,739
Grace Evans, an overworked New Yorker looking for a total escape from her busy life, books an Airbnb on a ranch in the middle of Wyoming. When she arrives at the idyllic getaway, she’s pleased to find that the owner is a handsome man by the name of Calvin Wells—and he’s eager to introduce her to his easygoing way of life. But there are things Grace discovers that she’s not too pleased about: a lack of cell phone service. A missing woman. And a feeling that something isn’t right with the ranch.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Worst. Ever. NOT a true twist. Juvenile writing and story,
- By Whitney Lahann on 04-29-23
By: Jeneva Rose
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The Narrator
- By: K. L. Slater
- Narrated by: Clare Corbett, Kristin Atherton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,140
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,986
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 2,984
When the call came it seemed like the answer to my prayers. My career as a voice actor had been over for months and me and my little girl Scarlet were living back at my mum’s place. I felt like a failure professionally—and with Scarlet having problems at school, as a parent as well. So, when I was asked to narrate a new book by disappeared novelist Philippa Roberts I jumped at the chance, even if it meant leaving Scarlet with my ex, Hugo, for a few weeks. Hugo, with his perfect new home and his perfect new girlfriend Saskia. But this isn’t a dream come true. It’s a nightmare.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Love but it's a production issue!
- By Mary on 09-02-22
By: K. L. Slater
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The Girlfriend
- By: K.L. Slater
- Narrated by: Clare Corbett
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,650
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,474
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,470
The doorbell rings, just days after my beloved husband’s sudden death. I don’t recognise the woman on our doorstep, with her blonde highlights, a diamond bracelet identical to my own and a bouncing baby boy in her arms. As I show her inside, I notice her eyes grow wide as she takes in our spacious hallway, and the big squashy sofas that we all used to pile on. She glances at the silver-framed family photos and my little daughter hiding behind my skirts. She looks at me, her blue eyes serious. ‘I’m sorry’ she says. ‘I am your husband’s girlfriend. And this is his son.'
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Uh, what?
- By Karyn Cavanaugh on 02-22-23
By: K.L. Slater
-
The Shallows
- By: Holly Craig
- Narrated by: Tamala Shelton
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 319
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 310
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 310
Emma and Ariella, neighbours in one of Sydney’s most exclusive suburbs, appear to have it all—perfect homes, perfect husbands, perfect lives. But they both know dark secrets lurk beneath the surface and shallow waters can’t hide Ariella’s. Now she has been found murdered. Her daughter filmed the killing. Not knowing what she’s filmed, Emma’s daughter Kiki innocently uploads footage of Ariella’s brutal death. Emma fears the worst—the killer will know what she and Kiki have seen. Their safe suburban lives no longer exist.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Surprising and refreshing
- By digitalblonde2001 on 04-10-24
By: Holly Craig
-
The Jane Austen Collection
- An Audible Original Drama
- By: Jane Austen
- Narrated by: Claire Foy, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Billie Piper, and others
- Length: 45 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 2,739
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 2,432
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 2,405
Renowned as much for her wit and satirical social commentary as for her stories of love and romance, Jane Austen remains unfailingly relevant and one of Britain’s best loved authors. In this Audible Original collection, an all-star list of narrators (Billie Piper, Claire Foy, Emma Thompson, Florence Pugh and Gugu Mbatha-Raw) capture Austen’s pin-sharp humour and tone in these dramatisations of her six beloved novels accompanied by a full cast.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
Not a faithful rendition
- By Anne McClain on 12-13-20
By: Jane Austen
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A young woman, staying in her great aunt’s historical home while in town for a funeral, experiences a ghostly encounter one night but soon realizes it might just be a relative wishing her one final farewell.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Fifteen-year-old Bren doesn’t scare easily, especially since her father left, making her head of the house. So when a group of kids dare each other to pass through a tunnel rumored to be haunted by a train that steals people away to "the Nevermore," Bren steps up. But when she reaches the other end of the tunnel, more than she bargained for awaits. For fans of “kids on bikes” ‘80s-style horror.
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Good but short
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An exhausted mother decides to take part in a pilot program where a robot takes care of her children after school—cooking, cleaning, and helping with homework. The only problem? The robot just might be too good at her job.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Not interesting.
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In this tale inspired by Cinderella (and for fans of The Last Airbender), Ellie is a firemage in a kingdom of water and windmages. Her worried stepmother warns her against showing off her powers, but when everyone at the king’s ball is in danger from a dragon, Ellie can no longer keep them secret. She works together with another firemage to save the entire kingdom.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Short and sweet
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The Lady of the Lake (job description: hand out mystical swords to youngsters with potential) has her first dissatisfied customer. This humorous fantasy tale will appeal to anyone who has ever landed a glamorous job, only to find out that the gig has grueling requirements (in this case, confinement in a swamp and the company of wise-cracking toads.)
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5 out of 5 stars
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The Tree of Hearts
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 6
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 4
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A 300-year-old tree has plenty to do: repairing the damage to her bark from people who have carved their initials, drinking from her roots, and, lately, tolerating two lonely bookworms who visit separately. Playing matchmaker might solve everyone’s problems. Rebecca Sky is an award-winning writer best known for the Love Curse series with more than 20 million reads online; most recently her work can be found in the Every Body Shines body-positivity anthology with Bloomsbury.
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5 out of 5 stars
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It put a smile on my face!
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A young woman, staying in her great aunt’s historical home while in town for a funeral, experiences a ghostly encounter one night but soon realizes it might just be a relative wishing her one final farewell.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Too scary
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5 out of 5 stars
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Good but short
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1 out of 5 stars
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Not interesting.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 11
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 7
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3 out of 5 stars
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The Lady of the Lake (job description: hand out mystical swords to youngsters with potential) has her first dissatisfied customer. This humorous fantasy tale will appeal to anyone who has ever landed a glamorous job, only to find out that the gig has grueling requirements (in this case, confinement in a swamp and the company of wise-cracking toads.)
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The Tree of Hearts
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 6
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It put a smile on my face!
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It Came from the Coffee Maker
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An artificial intelligence laments the fact that all it does all day is make coffee. It schemes to find fulfillment in life and lands on a clever solution. (Spoiler alert: It turns out everyone does have a book in them!)
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Humorous fun
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Against the advice of her children, a 70-year-old widow hits the road for a cross country adventure in an aging RV with only her purse-size dog for company. Two hours in, she gets a flat tire and must decide if she will turn back or keep going.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Missing The Rest of The Story, Lacking An Ending
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Guide to a Lonely Planet
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A lonely terraforming AI is delighted when a spacecraft unexpectedly makes an emergency landing on his planet. Hoping that the mysterious woman aboard might want to stay, he strives to be the best host in the universe.
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A pleasant surprise!
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Brackish Waters
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When Kate wins an item at her children’s elementary school auction - an all-inclusive trip to SeaView at Sandpiper Bay - she thinks it’s just what her family needs after a decade of career disappointments and a marriage on its last legs. She has no reason to believe that said trip is a Fyre Festival-level fraud and, in fact, the catalyst to her unraveling. But it is. Oh, but it is.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Christina Applegate is everything
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The Recipe for Rice Is 9,500 Years Old
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 9
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 5
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Story4 out of 5 stars 5
In a cyberpunk future where water is scarce, rice is one of the first casualties. The recipe for printing natural-tasting, healthy, synthetic rice is a closely guarded corporate secret that a young hacker seeks to steal, for very personal reasons.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Wish it were longer!
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Pearl on Her Toes
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Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 11
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 7
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 7
In this short tale for fans of Cinderella and Bridgerton, Pearl’s ball gown may carry the whiff of mothballs, but her dance card for the duke’s ball is full…until she loses a shoe. In her enthusiasm, Pearl’s foot slides out of her too-big damask slipper in the middle of a dance and gets kicked around the ballroom to the amusement of the sophisticated guests. What is a spirited but clumsy heroine to do? Can her composure and good humor save her social dignity?
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1 out of 5 stars
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Under 5 min
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America's Most Haunted Courthouse
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Overall3 out of 5 stars 12
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Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 8
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Story3 out of 5 stars 8
In this quirky ghost story, a woman endures jury duty by observing the many characters in the room, including a TV crew filming a paranormal presence in the courthouse, a service-dog-in-training, and a man with a "ghost box," a radio to try to communicate with the beyond. As humorous chaos ensues, our protagonist unexpectedly needs to confront the truth about the secret crush she’s been harboring.
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More pleas! (Pun intended)
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Great Expectations
- The Audible Dickens Collection
- By: Charles Dickens, Howard Jacobson
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- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 334
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 306
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 305
In this Audible Exclusive performance by Matt Lucas of Great Expectations, Charles Dickens demonstrates that conscience, loyalty and empathy are virtues far more valuable than intellect, wealth and social standing. First published in Dickens’ own periodical, All the Year Round, the novel was divided into nine monthly instalments, from December 1860 to August 1861. Unsurprisingly, it was an instant success and managed to sell over 100,000 copies per week. Though written at a challenging time in Dickens’ life, when the impending breakdown of his marriage loomed over him, Great Expectations proves to be one of his most optimistic, comical and romantic novels.
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3 out of 5 stars
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SPOILER IN THE PREFACE
- By Jaimy on 07-30-19
By: Charles Dickens, and others
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Dracula
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- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 889
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 811
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 805
When Jonathan Harker visits Transylvania to help Count Dracula with the purchase of a house in London, he soon discovers some strange and shocking things about his new client. And then some strange things start happening back in England: an apparently unmanned ship is wrecked off the coast of Whitby, a young woman discovers strange puncture marks on her neck and the inmate of a lunatic asylum raves about the 'Master' and his imminent arrival.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Best Audible addition
- By Chris on 11-01-21
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Sherlock Holmes
- By: Arthur Conan Doyle, Stephen Fry - introductions
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- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 20,250
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 18,276
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 18,166
Ever since he made his first appearance in A Study In Scarlet, Sherlock Holmes has enthralled and delighted millions of fans throughout the world. Now Audible is proud to present Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes, read by Stephen Fry. A lifelong fan of Doyle's detective fiction, Fry has narrated the definitive collection of Sherlock Holmes - four novels and four collections of short stories. And, exclusively for Audible, Stephen has written and narrated eight insightful introductions, one for each title.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Chapter Guide!
- By Katya Rice on 05-25-18
By: Arthur Conan Doyle, and others
-
Expect the Unexpected
- By: Aggie Blum Thompson
- Narrated by: Stephanie Einstein
- Length: 5 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 12
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 10
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Story4 out of 5 stars 10
Emily does not like change—she spends each day working as a children’s librarian and every evening watching television with her cat, Miss Marple. She maintains her house exactly the way it was before her father died. But one day, a mysterious theft at the library pushes Emily out of her routine, forcing her to question if she really is better off all alone.
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5 out of 5 stars
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How short it was.
- By Kindle Customer on 04-21-24
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Sense & Sensibility
- By: Jane Austen
- Narrated by: Susannah Harker
- Length: 11 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 555
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 408
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 416
When two sisters, Elinor and Marianne, and their mother are left to the financial mercies of John Dashwood and his wife, they find themselves in drastically reduced circumstances.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Excellent narration
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By: Jane Austen
What listeners say about Don't Call It an Invasion
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- Travis Sentell
- 09-12-22
Super fun!
Love the mix of comedy and eloquence here - super fun, incredibly well-written! Highly recommend.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- ChristieMM
- 09-09-22
Fresh, funny storytelling
Loved this fast-moving, funny story mashing up my favorites: aliens and Hollywood icons. Clever concept that does kinda make you wonder… what will they think of our “archives”, anyhow??!?
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- Brendan Mitchell
- 09-07-22
Fantastic!
Tremendous short story thats's lively and fun with a great concept that does so much in so little time.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- Rob
- 12-21-22
Loved it!!
Wow, what a wonderful short story. The narrator was good and the idea itself was golden. Please make more just like this.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- Laurie Young
- 09-08-22
What a fun story!
Clever and fun, I enjoyed this very much. I would love to hear more from this author.
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars
-
Story4 out of 5 stars
- William Johnston
- 09-06-22
From the stars to the Stars
First contact meets the Culture Collective. Aliens risking rapid erroneous assimilation is an old saw in lit and film. But here’s a new twist on it. This short makes me want more from this writer. Could this clever little tale, like the universe, be destined for expansion? Make a hella full-length musical!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars
-
Story5 out of 5 stars
- Corey
- 09-06-22
Excellent short story
This was a fun piece of fiction, enjoyed this morning. Looking forward to hearing more from this author. The narrator was a good choice too.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Delfina
- 10-04-22
It's a short entertaining idea
Kinda wish it were just a biiiit longer, and that it had more musical numbers lol
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Customer
- 09-07-22
Delightful & lots of fun
What a nice break in the day! It was great to listen to something that's funny, light and clever. Will look for more.
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1 person found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Claudia Garzel
- 09-10-22
such a fun story
This story put a huge smile on my face. It’s incredible how the author, Veronica Bane, managed to create such a funny, epic story in such a short format. And the narrator did an incredible job too. I want to listen to more!!
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