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Differently Wired

Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World
Narrated by: Deborah Reber
Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (30 ratings)
Regular price: $19.95
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Publisher's Summary

Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, giftedness, anxiety, sensory processing disorder, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But for the parents who love them, the challenges are just as hard - struggling to find the right school, the right therapist, the right parenting group while feeling isolated and harboring endless internal doubts about what’s normal, what’s not, and how to handle it all.     

But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and the best kind of been-there, done-that companion.     

On the one hand it’s a book of saying NO, and how it’s time to say no to trying to fit your round-peg kid into society’s square holes, no to educational and social systems that don’t respect your child, no to the anxiety and fear that keep parents stuck. And then it’s a book of YES. By offering 18 paradigm shifts - what she calls “tilts” - Reber shows how to change everything. How to “Get Out of Isolation and Connect.” “Stop Fighting Who Your Child Is and Lean In.” “Let Go of What Others Think.” “Create a World Where Your Child Can Feel Secure.” “Find Your People (and Ditch the Rest).” “Help Your Kids Embrace Self-Discovery.” And through these alternative ways of being, discover how to stay open, pay attention, and become an exceptional parent to your exceptional child.

©2018 Deborah Reber (P)2018 Audible, Inc.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Most amazing parenting book I've read.

Parenting, especially parenting children who are differently wired, doesn't come with an instruction manual ... until now. This book won't solve every parenting dilemma, of course, but it will give you a solid place to start your journey with your differently wired child. Debbie provides SO many resources and tips in this book, but, more importantly, she gives parents the peace of mind that they are NOT alone on this wild and wonderful adventure. Moreover, she paves the path for EMBRACING neurodiversity. I wholeheartedly recommend this book to EVERY parent, teacher, coach ... basically anyone who ever interacts with kids.

I also LOVE that the author read her own book ... I so appreciate hearing the author's story in her own voice!

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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very well thought out but not for everyone

I came to this book hoping to learn how to better reach, teach, understand, and provide for my neurologically different students. This is not that book. This book IS for parents of the neurologically diverse.

I had to give up the book after several hours because the first half or more is a laundry list of the problems facing these parents. This was somewhat eye-opening for me, so that was good. Not until much later does Reber get into the solutions, which seem to be to organize, educate (yourself and others), advocate and be an activist, but you're still on your own. This may be true, but it was depressing for me (and probably is for these parents too) and ultimately not what I was looking for. I do not know how much help this book would actually be for parents of these diverse kids.

It seemed to me that Reber is trying to promote the concept that these increasingly numerous neurological differences (1 in 5 kids) are actually a step forward on the evolutionary path. I accept the possibility, but something in the presentation rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe I am just the type she has to fight so hard against, I don't know.

I am a strong proponent of authors never reading their own material. Reber missed some points of emphasis that another reader might have made, but she does pretty well almost all the time. My biggest gripe may sound petty, but if she hopes to get into public speaking as part of her advocacy, she needs to ditch the voice affectation called glottal, or vocal, fry. This is that unnatural creaky, lowest tone your voice can make that came into fashion among young women more than 10 years ago. Some researchers suggest that this is done to add weight to the words by giving them a man's voice. I don't know if that is true, but I do know that a woman with a message doesn't need a man's voice. This unnatural voice usage usually shows up at the ends of sentences but Reber starts in with it after just a word or two. The more I listened to the book, the more annoying it became.

To sum up, if you are parenting an exceptional child, you might find this book supportive of your struggle, but it is hard to get through if you are not that invested in the topic.

4 of 6 people found this review helpful

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Very informative

Thank you for reminding us that we're not alone in this fight for our children!

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  • jana
  • ABQ, NM
  • 02-16-19

Great info!

I loved this book! Wish I'd had it when raising my exceptional children! Thank you!

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great for parents struggling

loved it! great for parents struggling with kids that dont fit the norm behaviorally. helps you think about your behavior and why your trying to change your child.

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    1 out of 5 stars

Disappointed

I don't believe schools need to be tailor-made or uniquely designed to the individual student; I think that sets up a philosophy of entitlement. Of course schools could do more to engage all kinds of learners who all deserve an engaging education. Then again that may absolutely be necessary in the case of autism. I was hoping for some advice that was actionable for our family but we do not deal with autism, so just not the right book for us.

1 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • Miss S Walsh
  • 12-29-18

This book is a lifeline

If you have a child with SEN (or think you may have) this is a must read. It will restore your sanity. And calling all teachers and parents of ‘typicals’ -please read this too. With this book, along with Deborah Reber’s podcasts, you’ll have a mentor and friend with you all the way to give you advice point you in the right direction. Thank you Debbie, you are a star.