Bearing the Unbearable

Love, Loss, and the Heartbreaking Path of Grief

By: Joanne Cacciatore

Narrated by: Joanne Cacciatore

If you love, you will grieve—and nothing is more mysteriously central to becoming fully human.

A 2017 Indies Finalist from Foreword Reviews.

When a loved one dies, the pain of loss can feel unbearable—especially in the case of a traumatizing death that leaves us shouting, “NO!” with every fiber of our body. The process of grieving can feel wild and nonlinear—and often lasts for much longer than other people, the nonbereaved, tell us it should.

Organized into fifty-two short chapters, Bearing the Unbearable is a companion for life’s most difficult times, revealing how grief can open our hearts to connection, compassion, and the very essence of our shared humanity. Dr. Joanne Cacciatore—bereavement educator, researcher, Zen priest, and leading counselor in the field—accompanies us along the heartbreaking path of love, loss, and grief. Through moving stories of her encounters with grief over decades of supporting individuals, families, and communities—as well as her own experience with loss—Cacciatore opens a space to process, integrate, and deeply honor our grief.

Not just for the bereaved, Bearing the Unbearable will be required listening for grief counselors, therapists and social workers, clergy of all varieties, educators, academics, and medical professionals. Organized into fifty-two accessible and stand-alone chapters, this book is also perfect for being listened to in support groups.

©2017 Joanne Cacciatore (P)2023 Joanne Cacciatore

The honesty

This book was immensely helpful and comforting to me as I am navigating the loss of my youngest adult child from suicide. No greater pain than I have known than that which I experience now on a daily basis since his death. Seeking to understand. Hoping to some day move forward with peace and greater love to those who need love. Especially my immediate family members. Thank you for your words, Joanne, and sharing your journey.

Being with grief

The book, Bearing the Unbearable, might seem to be a counter-intuitive approach to grief given what our "be happy" culture tells us about how to handle grief. While the world is telling us to get better, feel better and move on, it is, rather, through approaching and embracing grief that it helps us transform. Through the many grief stories from bereaved parents, siblings, spouses and children who have lost parents, Dr. Cacciatore demonstrates the power and value in giving space to remembering and honoring our deceased loved ones. I highly recommend this book.

- a bereaved Mom (K's Mom)

Grieving is a rebellious act

This is the best grief resource I’ve found so far. The author’s points of view were just what I needed to hear, and what I think our grief-fearing society, collectively, needs to hear. Her writing is absolutely relevant to anyone who has lost someone they love (I lost my only and younger sibling 1 month ago) but I also found it applicable to all of the grief we experience in our daily lives. I highly recommend this book to everyone.

Honest Grief not solutions

This book was my best friend for a couple weeks after my son died and people stop visiting every week. I recommend it to everyone I know.

Beautifully helpful

Sincerely loved listening to Dr. Jo tell the stories, helping all of us that are walking this path of grief and I’m sure even those that haven’t experienced it.