Episodios

  • Dating Like a CFO: ROI of Your Time, Energy, and Emotional Labor
    Sep 8 2025

    In this episode of The Wrong Ones, we’re putting the therapy couch in the middle of Wall Street. If you’ve ever felt like you were writing blank emotional checks, subsidizing someone else’s healing, or mistaking adrenaline for chemistry, this one’s for you. We blend medicine, psychology, and a little market humor to help you evaluate partners the way a CFO evaluates investments—by looking at fundamentals, risk, and real return on your most limited currencies: time, energy, and emotional labor.

    In this episode, we cover:

    • The “startup costs” of dating after heartbreak and why your nervous system feels overdrawn

    • The IPO Illusion: novelty bias, intermittent reinforcement, and why apps feel addictive

    • Due diligence for modern dating: words (press releases) vs. behavior (audited financials)

    • Attachment styles as credit ratings (secure = AAA; avoidant = junk bonds)

    • How to spot and track emotional burn rate—early

    • Portfolio diversification: resisting premature commitment bias and stabilizing your life portfolio

    • The exit strategy: cutting sunk costs without guilt and why relief is real data

    • Long-term value investing: choosing consistency, reciprocity, and co-regulation that compound

    Reflection Question of the Week:

    Where in your life are you over-investing your time and energy with little return—and how can you start reallocating your capital toward relationships that actually compound in value?

    Resources Mentioned:

    • Novelty bias & intermittent reinforcement research (behavioral psychology)

    • Decision fatigue and glucose depletion in the prefrontal cortex (self-regulation studies)

    • Attachment theory (Bowlby; Hazan & Shaver) and adult attachment outcomes

    • Allostatic load & chronic stress physiology; HRV and cortisol basics

    • Secure attachment as a health protective factor (relationship longevity & wellbeing)

    • Cognitive biases: sunk cost fallacy; premature commitment bias

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production

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    45 m
  • Party of One: Dinner Parties, Dating Apps, and Finding Your People
    Sep 1 2025

    In this episode of The Wrong Ones, we’re talking about why single friends matter when you’re single—especially in your 30s. Because let’s be honest: sometimes it feels like everyone else is married, pregnant, or building Montessori Pinterest boards, while you’re the only “party of one” at the table. But being single doesn’t have to mean being lonely. With the right mirrors—friends in your same season of life—it can feel like freedom, belonging, and even joy.

    Blending psychology, humor, and real-life stories, this conversation explores the importance of resonance, the health impact of loneliness, and the radical act of building community that reflects your current season back to you.

    In this episode, we cover:
    • Why your “mistakes” in love are actually classrooms, not failures

    • How shifting from dating to marrydating to learn transforms energy and expectations

    • The psychology of seasons of life (Erikson, belonging, and social resonance)

    • Why being the only single friend can amplify loneliness and comparison burnout

    • How attachment theory and co-regulation apply to friendships, not just dating

    • The cultural pressure of weddings, baby showers, and social timelines

    • Practical ways to find and nurture single friends in your 30s

    • Why laughter, rituals, and resonance are medicine for this season

    Reflection Question of the Week:

    What season of life are you in right now, and how can you find or build community that reflects it back to you?

    Resources Mentioned:
    • Erikson’s stages of psychosocial development (intimacy vs. isolation)

    • U.S. Surgeon General’s report on loneliness as a public health crisis

    • Attachment theory research (Bowlby, Hazan & Shaver) and co-regulation studies

    • Social comparison theory & relative deprivation theory

    • Research on collective effervescence (Durkheim)

    • Studies on laughter, endorphins, and emotional regulation in friendships

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production.

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    34 m
  • Dating Mistakes I’ve Made (So You Don’t Have To)
    Aug 25 2025

    In this episode of The Wrong Ones, we’re unpacking the messy, funny, painful, and oh-so-human mistakes we make in love—and why most of them aren’t accidents at all, but patterns rooted in psychology, attachment, and our own unmet needs. From confusing chemistry with compatibility to breaking our own non-negotiables, I share the lessons I learned the hard way—and the science behind why we keep repeating them.

    Blending humor, research, and personal stories, this conversation is equal parts therapy session, neuroscience breakdown, and a reminder that every “wrong one” shapes the way we eventually show up for the right love.

    In this episode, we cover:
    • Why chemistry feels intoxicating but often disguises incompatibility

    • The trap of trying to change someone who didn’t ask to be changed

    • The difference between attention and affection—and why it matters

    • How boundaries actually protect love instead of pushing people away

    • The psychology of attachment, dopamine, and why your nervous system confuses chaos for passion

    • Subtle relationship habits that sabotage intimacy without us realizing it

    • The biggest lessons I wish I could tell my younger self about love, standards, and self-trust

    • How to move forward without bitterness and keep your heart open

    Reflection Question of the Week:

    What’s one relationship mistake you’ve made that you can now thank yourself for — because of what it taught you?

    Resources Mentioned:
    • Attachment theory research (Ainsworth, Bowlby, Hazan & Shaver)

    • Fisher et al. (2010) on dopamine and early-stage romance

    • Doidge (2007) on neuroplasticity and rewiring patterns

    • Intermittent reinforcement studies on addiction and relationships

    • Research on the Reticular Activating System (RAS) and selective attention

    • Studies on boundaries, people-pleasing, and relationship satisfaction

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production.

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    45 m
  • Soulmates Don’t Exist: But Great Sex and Better Standards Do
    Aug 18 2025
    In this episode of The Wrong Ones, we’re breaking up with one of the most romanticized — and misleading — ideas in modern dating: the soulmate myth. From the “readiness” lie to the science behind why heartbreak feels like a broken bone, we unpack why believing in the one can actually hold you back from finding love that’s real, healthy, and sustainable.

    In this episode, we cover:

    • How to tell if you’re genuinely ready to start dating again (and why “ready” isn’t a magical morning announcement from the universe).

    • The neuroscience of heartbreak, emotional regulation, and why your nervous system knows before your mind does.

    • The cultural origins of the soulmate myth and the psychological traps it creates.

    • Why letting go of “the one” opens the door to better, freer, and more abundant love.

    • Personal stories of past relationships that felt like fate — and what they really taught about love, growth, and self-worth.

    Blending humor, storytelling, and research from psychology, neuroscience, and relationship science, this episode is both a reality check and a permission slip: you don’t only get one great love story. You get many—and the next beautiful connection might arrive out of nowhere, long after you thought the best was behind you.

    Reflection Question of the Week:

    Think about one of the most beautiful connections you’ve ever had. How would it feel to trust that your next beautiful connection will arrive just as unexpectedly?

    Resources Mentioned:

    • Clinical Psychology Review (2021) study on emotional regulation and relationship readiness

    • Fisher et al. (2010) research on heartbreak and the brain’s reward system

    • Knee et al. (2003) on destiny belief and relationship disengagement

    • Boss (1999) on ambiguous loss

    • Aron et al. (1997) on creating closeness with strangers

    • Neuroplasticity research from Doidge (2007)

    • Oxytocin and cortisol research (Ditzen et al., 2007)

    • Companionate love study in Social Psychological and Personality Science (2012)

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production.

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    31 m
  • I Call It Healing, My Accountant Calls It Concerning: Grieving What You Missed and Reclaiming What You Love
    Aug 11 2025

    In this tender, science-backed episode of The Wrong Ones, we talk about why play isn’t regression—it’s repair. Using the Labubu phenomenon as a doorway, we unpack how nostalgia, variable reinforcement (dopamine), and “comfort consumerism” can actually be signals from the nervous system asking for softness and safety. We explore inner-child work through attachment theory and somatic psychology, grieve the life our parents imagined for us, and practice building one that finally feels like home. We also look at the only-child experience—why so many only children feel “wise beyond their years,” and how to lovingly rebalance the “mini-adult” identity with real play.

    This episode is for anyone who’s ever thought, “Why do I feel guilty resting?” or “Why does joy feel… awkward?” and for the former gifted kids, good daughters, and only children who are learning to choose themselves with tenderness.

    In this episode, we cover:
    • What it means to stop earning love and let it land—soft, safe, unearned

    • Why Labubu hits our reward circuitry: anticipation, novelty, and the neuroscience of nostalgia

    • Play as protest: how silliness and awe regulate an overworked nervous system

    • Inner child 101: theta-state learning (0–7), attachment blueprints, and introjected beliefs

    • The quiet grief of leaving the life your parents wanted—and choosing alignment over optics

    • Only-child psychology: adult modeling, upward scaffolding, “mini-adult” roles, and the peer-skills trade-off

    • Gentle reparenting: journaling prompts that witness (not fix) your younger self

    • Somatic first aid: regulate first (breath, vagal toning, cold splash, rocking), then reflect

    • Joy reps & micro-rituals: building a daily rhythm your inner child feels safe in

    • Boundaries that protect the child self: a soft no, a playful yes, and one clear limit where guilt used to live

    • Reframe to keep: “Labubu isn’t regression. It’s resurrection.”

    Reflection Question of the Week:

    What is one thing your inner child always longed for—but never received—and how can you give it to them now?

    Let it be small. A ritual, a boundary, a $12 joy. Let it be yours.

    Resources Mentioned:
    • Bowlby & Ainsworth on Attachment Theory

    • Bessel van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score

    • EMDR & Internal Family Systems (IFS) approaches to trauma processing

    • Research on dopamine, anticipation, and variable reinforcement

    • Writing on comfort consumerism during economic stress

    • Family Systems Theory on introjection and role consolidation (the only-child “mini-adult”)

    • Somatic practices for vagal toning and nervous-system regulation

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production.

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    52 m
  • The Q&A Episode: Green Flags, Ghosts, and the Guy Who Gifted a Fake Trip to Italy
    Aug 4 2025

    In this lighter (but still unhinged) episode of The Wrong Ones, we’re switching things up with a special listener Q&A. From cosmic gaslighting and spiritual co-parenting offers to spreadsheet-date reviews and fake trips to Italy, you all seriously delivered.

    We’re answering 15 real questions submitted via Instagram—from the deeply relatable to the wildly absurd—serving up hot takes, red flag radars, and honest reflections on what it means to date in an era of soft launches and disappearing acts. Whether you’re questioning your own dating patterns or just here for the chaos, this episode offers equal parts insight, validation, and laughs.

    If you’ve ever wondered:

    • Is he actually healing or just emotionally unavailable with a better PR team?

    • Are you being too picky or just asking the wrong person?

    • And… does he really deserve a response if he gifted a fake Italy trip in front of his family?

    This one’s for you.

    In this episode, we cover:
    • Why your relationship timelines matter more than his comfort zone

    • The art of catching feelings after one good date (and why it doesn’t mean you’re delulu)

    • A guy who Venmo requested for a drink he drank… and called it feminism

    • Green flags vs trauma dumps: is vulnerability or manipulation?

    • What to do when your ex comes back from the digital dead like nothing happened

    • Fake trip gifting, ChatGPT love notes, and Google Doc performance reviews

    • When to wait… and when to walk away

    • Dating older men: evolved maturity or intentional bachelorhood?

    • What healthy texting habits actually look like

    • Why some guys treat love like a startup pitch deck

    • And the question that matters most: are you abandoning yourself to keep someone else?

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production.

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    51 m
  • Can I Pull You for a Chat? On Generational Trauma, Emotional Reprogramming, and Finally Feeling Safe in Love
    Jul 28 2025

    In this searingly honest episode of The Wrong Ones, we crack open the blueprint that governs who we love, how we attach, and why we often mistake chaos for chemistry. Using a viral Call Her Daddy interview as a launch point, we go deep into the heart of relational trauma—unpacking what it means to grow up in silence, perform for love, and unconsciously seek out men who echo the wounds of our fathers.

    This isn’t just about heartbreak—it’s about history. We explore the intersection of psychology, neurobiology, and cultural legacy to understand why so many women—especially daughters of Middle Eastern families—feel safest in relationships that are anything but safe.

    We talk about the invisible grief of feeling unknown by the people who were supposed to know you best. The generational inheritance of silence. The father wound. The good daughter myth. And how healing starts when we stop auditioning for love and start choosing it—with ourselves first.

    This episode is an anchor for anyone who’s ever thought, “Why do I keep ending up here?” and a lifeline for the women finally ready to say: no more.

    In this episode, we cover:

    • What it means to outgrow the version of you who survived through performance

    • Attachment blueprints and how your nervous system confuses trauma with love

    • The cultural double bind faced by Middle Eastern daughters: silence or betrayal

    • Why emotional addiction is real—and how it mimics chemical addiction

    • How generational trauma is passed down, not just through behavior, but biology

    • The neuroscience of intermittent reinforcement and trauma bonding

    • The grief of never being emotionally known by your father—and what that does to your sense of self

    • The myth of the “good daughter” and how it sets the stage for self-abandonment in love

    • High-functioning trauma and the mask of the “cool girl”

    • Why real love often feels boring to an unhealed nervous system

    • Reparenting your inner child and breaking the cycle of dating your wounds

    • Somatic healing tools to regulate your nervous system and interrupt the pattern

    • Forgiveness as emotional liberation—not validation

    • The cost of healing when it means leaving behind who you had to be

    • What it means to choose a love that doesn’t hurt—and how to recognize it when it arrives

    Reflection Question of the Week: What does love feel like in a body that no longer thinks it has to earn it?

    Let this one live in your journal. Or your voice notes. Or your next first date.

    Resources Mentioned:
    • Bowlby & Ainsworth’s Attachment Theory

    • Bessel van der Kolk’s The Body Keeps the Score

    • EMDR & Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy

    • Research on dopamine, trauma bonding & intermittent reinforcement (Volkow et al.)

    • Middle Eastern honor culture & the role of silence in female identity formation

    • The neuroscience of emotional addiction & nervous system dysregulation

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production.

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    1 h y 44 m
  • Your 30s Will Break You: The Gift of Outgrowing the Life You’ve Built
    Jul 21 2025

    In this deeply resonant episode of The Wrong Ones, we unpack the quiet collapse that often begins in your 30s—the decade that doesn’t just change you, but dismantles you. This is the chapter of your life where things look fine on the outside, but inside? Something feels… off. Misaligned. Exhausted. Unrecognizable.

    We explore the psychology, neuroscience, and emotional unraveling behind this transformative season of life. From identity dissonance and nervous system collapse to ambiguous grief and the slow return to self, this episode is a tender roadmap for anyone who’s ever asked, “Why doesn’t this life I built feel like mine?”

    We talk about what it means to grieve a version of yourself that no longer fits, the loss of imagined futures, the discomfort of peace when you’ve lived in survival mode, and the sacred messiness of becoming. And we close with a breakdown on why we choose the wrong people when we’re unhealed—and how healing changes who we let into our lives.

    In this episode, we cover:

    • Why your 30s feel like a nervous system breakdown disguised as growth

    • Identity dissonance, depersonalization, and why you feel like a stranger in your own life

    • The neuroscience of “quiet collapse” and how your brain rewires under stress

    • Ambiguous grief and the loss of a life you thought would make you happy

    • Post-traumatic growth, regulation dominance, and the recalibration of self

    • The emotional and biological shift from performance to presence

    • Why peace can feel suspicious when you’ve lived in chaos

    • Attachment, fawning, and how self-abandonment starts to feel unbearable

    • Reinvention as a solitary process—and why loneliness often comes before alignment

    • How your nervous system influences who you date, love, and let in

    • Trauma bonding, dopamine burnout, and the reason chaos feels like chemistry

    • The difference between being chosen and feeling safe

    • Why healing changes your entire social life, including friendships

    • What it means to stop chasing clarity and start living in complexity

    Reflection Question of the Week:
    What version of yourself are you grieving—and who are you becoming in their place?
    Or—what’s one version of yourself you’ve outgrown, and what are you learning to choose instead?

    Resources Mentioned:

    • Erik Erikson’s Psychosocial Development Theory

    • Bessel van der Kolk’s The Body Keeps the Score

    • Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy

    • Donald Winnicott’s Theory on the Capacity to Be Alone

    • Research on trauma bonding, dopamine burnout, and prediction error signaling

    • Volkow et al. studies on reward pathways in addiction

    ----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

    Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

    An Operation Podcast production.

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    1 h y 1 m