Have you ever told yourself, “I’ll be happy when…”? It’s such a common thought that we really don't question it. But what happens when you finally reach that goal, milestone, or dream? Too often, the happiness you imagined doesn’t last, or doesn’t show up at all.

In this episode, we’ll explore why the emotional payoff we expect from achievement often fades so quickly. We’ll talk about the human tendency to overestimate how good we’ll feel “once we get there,” and why real, lasting happiness isn’t found in arriving at some future destination but in how we live right now.

I’ll share research on why we’re wired to misjudge what will make us happy and how this can keep us chasing goal after goal without feeling truly satisfied. And most importantly, we’ll look at what you can do instead, so you can bring more of the feelings you want into your everyday life.

Plus, there’s a free reflection worksheet waiting for you in the Podcast Resources Hub to help you put this week’s Happiness Challenge into practice.

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic

Building a Happiness Ritual: One Small Moment That’s Just for You

If you ever feel like your days carry you along without giving you a moment to breathe, this episode is for you.

Today we’re talking about happiness rituals. Simple, intentional moments you choose on purpose to reconnect with how you want to feel. Unlike habits you do on autopilot, these rituals are interruptions you welcome. A way to slow down and remember that you’re more than your to-do list.

We’ll talk about why these rituals work, what research says about the best ways to keep them meaningful, and how to design one that actually fits your life. Whether you use yours to start the day with a little more space for yourself, wind down at night, or rescue yourself when the day gets too loud, you’ll leave with ideas for creating your own personal signal to slow down and feel good.

This week’s Happiness Challenge will guide you in designing and trying your own ritual, so you can make space to feel more like yourself, one small moment at a time.

I have created a worksheet in the FREE Podcast Resources Hub to help you design your ritual. The use THIS LINK or go to karencastillo.org.

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic

The Role of Habits in Happiness: How small, consistent actions shape our identity and well-being

When we think about what creates happiness, we often imagine big events or major life changes. But research shows that the real foundation of happiness is built through small, everyday habits. In this episode, we explore how habits influence our emotional well-being, how they’re formed in the brain, and why repetition and environment, not willpower, is the key to change.

You’ll learn:

· Why up to 40% of your daily actions are habitual

· How direct context cuing shapes your behavior automatically

· What neuroscience reveals about the effort habits require

· How to replace draining habits with ones that support happiness

· Why even one-minute habits can make a lasting difference

This week’s Happiness Challenge: The Tiny Habit Practice

Your challenge this week is to create a 1-minute happiness habit. Choose one small action that feels good to you, and remember, start tiny. It could be:

• Lighting a candle and taking three deep breaths
• Stepping outside for a minute and really noticing your environment
• Writing one thing you are grateful for and feeling that gratitude
• Texting someone just to say you’re thinking of them

Commit to doing it every day for one week. Same time, same place if possible. That’s it. Start that habit for one week. Forget the outcome, just do it. Then next week you can decide if you want to continue.

I have created a worksheet in the FREE Podcast Resources Hub to help you log your habit and plan for ways to slowly increase it for more impact. The use THIS LINK or go to karencastillo.org.

Resources Mentioned:

• [Free Download] The Tiny Habit Practice–available now inside the Podcast Resources Hub
• Habits—A Repeat Performance By: David T. Neal, Wendy Wood, and Jeffrey M. Quinn

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic

In this final episode of our Broaden-and-Build series, we explore the big picture: what all those small moments of joy and positive emotion are really leading to: flourishing.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re just going through the motions, you’re not alone. Many people today are stuck in a state of languishing, not depressed, but not thriving either. In this episode, I break down what flourishing actually looks like, how it differs from languishing, and why it’s not something you have to earn or figure out. It’s something you can build, slowly and intentionally, starting with a few small shifts.

We’ll talk about how positive emotions reshape our lives, why they matter more than we think, and how to begin moving toward a life that feels fuller, more alive, and more like you.

What You’ll Learn:

• Why flourishing is about progress, not perfection
• The difference between flourishing and languishing, and why many of us live in between
• How positive emotions can help you build resilience, connection, and lasting well-being
• Small, practical ways to start moving toward a life that feels more fulfilling
• How our culture of disconnection and busyness contributes to languishing, and what to do about it

This Week’s Happiness Challenge: Mindful Photography

This week, your Happiness Challenge is a creative one, and it’s based on research from Dr. Jaime Kurtz and Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky.

They found that taking photos of meaningful or positive moments can actually increase happiness, not just by documenting the moment, but by encouraging you to notice and savor it more deeply.

Here’s how to do it:

Throughout the week I want you to take some photos of what brings you happiness and makes you feel good. This isn’t a vision board of what you want your future to look like, they should represent what brings you positive feelings now in your daily life. Ask yourself, if you wanted someone to understand you and what you care most about, how would you capture it?

Take at least five photos this week. Then create a file on your phone or computer, somewhere that you can access them easily. Add to them when you experience something good and refer to them when you need a boost.

I’ve also created a printable worksheet with journaling prompts around this exercise. It is the last part of the “Positivity Reset Kit” I’ve been putting together throughout this series, and together they’ll help you build the habit of prioritizing positivity in your everyday life. They are available now for free in the Podcast Resources Hub. You can find the link in the episode description or head to karencastillo.org and click on Podcast. Or use THIS LINK to get started!

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic

In today’s episode, we’re continuing our look at positive emotions by exploring how they build on each other over time to create lasting change. We’ll break down the concept of the upward spiral—how one good moment can lead to another—and look at the science behind why it works.

You’ll also learn about the 3-to-1 positivity ratio, what it means for your daily life, and how to use it as a guide for creating more balance, growth, and emotional well-being.

This Week’s Happiness Challenge: The Good List
This week, I want you to start paying attention to the smallest moments of positive emotion, especially the ones you’d normally overlook, and start a running list of the good things in your day. Things like a small laugh, a quiet moment before you get out of your car, or the comfort of home.

They don’t have to be big, just real. Your only job is to notice them, and when you do, think, “That goes on the good list.” The goal isn’t to explain why it mattered, just to start noticing the moments that feel good.

This exercise is great because more you notice these moments, the more you develop an eye for them. Before you know it, you’ll find yourself looking for bright spots in your day and noting them without even making any effort.

And even the smallest positive moments can create momentum. This is how upward spirals begin, not with big changes, but with small shifts in awareness.

To help keep you on track I’ve created a FREE printable worksheet called The Good List. This worksheet is a continuation of the tools from the other episodes in this series, and together they’ll help you build the habit of prioritizing positivity in your everyday life. They are available now for free in the Podcast Resources Hub. You can find the link in the episode description or head to karencastillo.org and click on Podcast.

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic

What if the way you respond to stress could actually make you stronger?

In this episode of Redefining Happiness, we’re continuing our look at the Broaden-and-Build Theory with a focus on resilience. You’ll learn how positive emotions like joy, amusement, and curiosity can help you bounce back from adversity, not by pretending everything’s fine, but by expanding your capacity to cope with clarity and creativity.

We’ll talk about how resilient people use emotional range (not toxic positivity), and why finding small moments of connection or meaning during tough times isn’t a distraction, it’s part of recovery.

This Week’s Happiness Challenge: Pause and Reframe
When something hard, frustrating, or overwhelming happens this week, take a moment to acknowledge it fully, don’t brush it aside. Then ask yourself, “Is there something small and positive I can notice or create alongside this?” or just "What's Good?"

Some ideas include:

• Try reframing “I have to do this” with “I get to do this” if what you’re doing is hard but something you want to do
• A hopeful thought or daydream about when the hard time passes
• Focus on something that made you laugh, or find something to laugh about
• Even leaning into the hard thing and recognizing your own effort to keep going

If you’d like help with this practice, I’ve created a FREE Expanded Worksheet in the Podcast Resources Hub. It includes a journaling space to reflect on both the difficult moments and the positivity you notice. The free Resources Hub is your go-to library for exercises, templates, and exclusive content to help you apply what you’re learning each week. Use THIS LINK to get started!

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic

Positive emotions do more than just feel good, they help you grow, recover, and build lasting resilience. In this episode of Redefining Happiness, we explore why positive and negative emotions feel so different, and what those differences mean for your health and happiness.

Drawing on Dr. Barbara Fredrickson’s Broaden-and-Build Theory, you’ll learn how emotions like joy, interest, and contentment expand your thinking, create long-term benefits, and even help undo the effects of stress on your body.

We’ll also talk about why increasing positive emotions isn’t indulgent, it’s essential. It strengthens your relationships, your creativity, your well-being, and even your longevity.

This week’s Happiness Challenge: Build Your Positivity Reset Kit

This week, I invite you to create your own Positivity Reset Kit, a go-to collection of things that help lift your mood and ease stress, so that they’re already available for you the next time you’re having a tough day.

Here are a few ideas to get started:

A playlist of songs that always make you feel better, bonus if they’re fun to sign along to

A folder of funny cat videos (or whatever makes you laugh)

Photos from good times that remind you of the what you love and value most, or just make you happy

A list of people you feel safe reaching out to

Quotes or messages that help you feel grounded or inspired

Then, when you’re feeling anxious, stressed, or down, pull something from your reset kit and see how it shifts your state.

To help you build and test this, I’ve created a FREE Positivity Reset Kit inside the Free Podcast Resources Hub with templates, worksheets, and journal prompts that together build an effective tool to help you reset your mood and calm your mind.

This kit is only available in the hub, so head to karencastillo.org and click on Podcast, or find use this link to get started.

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic

The Focusing Illusion: Is One Goal Defining Your Happiness?

What if lasting happiness isn’t found in one big goal, but in how you choose to focus on your everyday life?

In this episode of Redefining Happiness, we explore the Focusing Illusion, a concept from Dr. Daniel Kahneman and Dr. David Schkade that shows how our minds exaggerate the importance of whatever we’re currently thinking about. That hyperfocus on one goal, one milestone, one area of stress? It might be quietly distorting how happy you feel, and how satisfied you believe you are.

You’ll learn how this mental habit can cause us to delay happiness, misjudge our well-being, and overlook the smaller, sustaining moments that actually shape our emotional lives. We’ll also look at why daily life, not milestone moments, is where lasting well-being is built.

This episode is a reminder that no single achievement will ever carry the full weight of your happiness. But where you place your attention each day just might.

This Week’s Happiness Challenge: Refocusing the Goal

This week’s Happiness Challenge is a journaling exercise all about gently shifting your focus.

I want you to take a few quiet minutes and reflect on where your attention is going.

Is there one big thing you’re pinning your happiness on right now? Are you enjoying the process? Are you over-investing in one big goal at the expense of the present?

Want to go deeper?

To help you go deeper, I’ve created an expanded journaling worksheet with reflection questions to help you reframe the way you relate to your goal and reconnect with what actually brings you happiness.

You can grab the full worksheet inside the Podcast Resources Hub—just click the link in the show notes or head to karencastillo.org and click on “Podcast.”

If you haven’t signed up yet, this is the perfect time to join—it’s free, and once you’re in, you’ll get access to every episode’s tools, including bonus downloads I don’t share anywhere else.

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Music: "Be Happy" by danamusic