What if the problem was never you?

For so many years, I believed that if I could just fix myself enough, improve enough, and be better enough, I would finally feel calm, confident, and at peace. Yet, no matter how much I worked on myself, there was always something else to fix.

In this deeply personal episode, I share one of the most life changing truths I've learned in over 20 years of coaching and doing my own emotional healing work. 🩷

This episode is about what happens when you stop treating yourself like a problem to solve and start relating to yourself with acceptance, compassion, and emotional adulthood.

Inside this episode, you'll learn:
- Why believing you are broken keeps you stuck in shame, self doubt, and emotional exhaustion
- The truth about perfection and why there is no finish line where you finally get it right
- How to stop being harsh and critical with yourself when you mess up
- The difference between emotional childhood and emotional adulthood
- How self acceptance actually helps you grow faster, not slower
- Why the relationship you have with yourself affects your confidence, parenting, and every other relationship in your life

This is not about giving up on growth. It is about growing from love instead of criticism.

If you have ever felt like you are too much, not enough, or secretly flawed, this episode will feel like coming home.

You are not broken. And the moment you truly understand that is the moment everything can begin to change.

🎧 If you liked this episode, you'll like this one:

The Power of Lovability: Transform Your Relationships and Self-Confidence on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-power-of-lovability-transform-your/id1434429161?i=1000661733596

The Power of Lovability: Transform Your Relationships and Self-Confidence on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/3AjLvAVYKkgoNmw8UMCirI?si=MRpUKR3DSRG2cdHzvgfsIA

📩 Don't miss out: I send weekly wellness tips, episode updates, giveaways and links I love: https://SMBwell.com/newsletter

⭐️Get on Coach Susie's one-on-one schedule here: https://smbwell.com/work-with-me/

🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP with the foundations of emotional intelligence and mental wellness here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap

👩🏼‍🎓The Love Your Life School Membership-http://theLoveYourLifeSchool.com

🙌🏾 Buy Susie's a coffee (and support small business and Susie's mission: https://patreon.com/susiepettit 🙏🏾

🩷Let's be friends on Instagram-https://instagram.com/smb.wellness

🌟Get the full show notes here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/402

📺Find and follow her on YouTube - LOVE YOUR LIFE VLOG - YouTube https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLW9PibXJfNpKk5Yr6rpNVq4P_utWFkvYS

Last week, I shared a more personal reflection on why this podcast exists. Today, I want to bring it back to coaching and answer a powerful question: after 400 episodes, what actually helps the most?

In this episode, I teach the first of two foundational skills that reduce emotional suffering, reactivity, and relationship drama. This simple but profound shift will help you feel more calm, more empowered, and less at the mercy of other people's behavior.

If you've ever felt hijacked by your emotions or stuck in patterns you don't like, this is where the change begins.

Next week, I'll share the second skill that completes the picture. Thanks for being the type of person who listens to shows like the Love Your Life Show. xx

🎧 If you liked this episode, you'll like this one:

Truth Bomb: It's Not About You! on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/121-truth-bomb-its-not-about-you/id1434429161?i=1000501078688

Truth Bomb: It's Not About You! on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/2TxQu1k5OVR5dsHP3UKB3x?si=m4_9lAhhQw-R4VrRAbqnSA

📩Get email inspo! Each Wednesday, I send weekly wellness tips, episode updates, giveaways and links I love: https://SMBwell.com/newsletter

⭐️Work with Susie: https://smbwell.com/work-with-me/

🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP https://SMBwell.com/roadmap

👩🏼‍🎓The Love Your Life School Membership-http://theLoveYourLifeSchool.com

🙌🏾 Buy Susie a coffee (and support her mission): https://patreon.com/susiepettit 🙏🏾

🩷Let's be friends on Instagram-https://instagram.com/smb.wellness

🌟Get the full show notes here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/401

📺Find and follow her on YouTube-LOVE YOUR LIFE VLOG - YouTube https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLW9PibXJfNpKk5Yr6rpNVq4P_utWFkvYS

My eldest son just got married, and for the first time in over a decade, I was in the same room as my estranged sister, my father, my ex-husband, and his entire family. In this personal life update, I'm sharing exactly how it went, including what my own tools looked like in the hardest moments and what surprised me most. I talk about clean pain versus dirty pain, what it feels like when the nervous system finally starts to trust, and why I believe change is one hundred percent possible. If you have been following my journey, this one is for you.

What You'll Learn in This Episode

• What it actually looked like to walk into a high-stakes family event after years of estrangement

• How clean pain versus dirty pain showed up in real time at the wedding

• The turning point my ex-husband and I reached that I am so grateful for

• What it felt like to face my father without fear or the need to people-please

• The moment that brought me to tears (the good kind) when I saw my three sons together

• Why I believe one hundred percent that change is possible, no matter where you are right now

If you liked this show, you'll like this one:

My Most Vulnerable Episode Yet on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/230-my-most-vulnerable-episode-yet/id1434429161?i=1000589799587

My Most Vulnerable Episode Yet on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/2kU0nc1wDkFMS0zo2ZmdY0?si=dBdypzPeTBOpUi9Vfc5fHg

Get all the links we mentioned go here👉🏾https://smbwell.com/healing-after-family-estrangement-life-update

Want more support?

📩 Subscribe to the weekly newsletter http://bit.ly/2gYQMlA so you never miss an episode.

💬 Share this with a friend who's navigating a tough relationship.

👩🏼‍🎓Take it to the next level and join the Love Your Life School http://theloveyourlifeschool.com/

📸 Tag me on Instagram @smb.wellness https://instagram.com/smb.wellness so I can cheer you on!

This episode is different, and I wanted to speak to you more personally than usual.

I'm sharing the real reasons this podcast was born, the moments that almost broke me, and what has kept me showing up here for 400 episodes. This isn't a how-to or a lecture, it's a heart-to-heart conversation about being human, especially when life feels heavy. If this podcast has ever kept you company during a hard season, this episode is for you. I wanted you to know how much you matter to me and to this community.

If you get even one thing from any of these 400 episodes that helps you feel more seen, more connected, more loved, more human, my heart is full. I know others make a lot of money through advertising, and are better marketers to get more clients. I've been told I give too much information away for free.

But in my 54 years, I've learned this. If something feels good, do more of it. And this is really what feels good.

Links Mentioned on this Episode:

🎁 Gift Susie a penny for every episode! Once or monthly. She'll be SO EXCITED!! https://patreon.com/susiepettit

🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap

Interested in any of the other roadmaps? Get them here:

-Top Episodes on Narcissists and Narcissist Recovery https://smbwell.com/narc

-Top Parenting Episodes https://smbwell.com/mom/

-Codependency and Anxiety in Relationship Episodes: https://SMBwell.com/feelbetter

-Top 5 Downloaded Episodes https://smbwell.com/top5

📩 EMAIL INSPO: I send weekly wellness tips, episode updates, giveaways, and links I love: https://SMBwell.com/newsletter

⭐️Get on Coach Susie's one-on-one schedule here: https://smbwell.com/work-with-me/

👩🏼‍🎓The Love Your Life School Membership-http://theLoveYourLifeSchool.com

📸Let's be friends on Instagram-https://instagram.com/smb.wellness

🌟Get the full show notes here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/

📺Find and follow her on YouTube-LOVE YOUR LIFE VLOG - YouTube

I am sitting down with my new friend, Dr. Danielle Dowling, for a conversation I believe every mom needs to hear.

In this episode, we talk about why motherhood can feel so overwhelming even when you are doing everything "right." We explore how invisible labor keeps women exhausted, how the 'good girl conditioning' gets activated in motherhood, and why so many moms blame themselves instead of questioning the system they are in.

We had a wonderful conversation about all the things that can affect and drain you. We delved into her wonderful book, Good Girl, Bad Mom.

Her book reads like a love letter to every woman who's ever felt imperfect, overwhelmed, and like she's supposed to smile through the struggle. It's for women who love their kids fiercely but miss themselves. It's for new or future Moms who want an honest, supportive roadmap before they feel blindsided.

Her book (and our conversation 💝) blends warmth, humor, and psychological insight that will help you make micro-resets in your life. She provides scripts, practical tools, and even something Motherhood has never had before: a job description! One necessary step in changing the system is to name the invisible work done by us all.

If you have ever felt like you are the only one struggling, like you are somehow doing motherhood wrong, please click play.

It's not you.

You are not broken.

And there is another way forward.

If you liked this show, you'll like this one:

Mom Guilt and Overwhelm in Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/297-mom-guilt-and-overwhelm/id1434429161?i=1000651974167

Mom Guilt and Overwhelm in Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/1gdShEKf8sFNyy3cWqtgzf?si=i-Wb1EiFQZupRh_L7zAKWQ

Get all the links we mentioned and connect with Dr. Danielle Dowling, go here 👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/399

Want more support?
💝 If you don't have a life coach, see if Susie has room on her one-on-one calendar https://smb.acuityscheduling.com/schedule/f6bcf873/appointment/9094644/calendar/250342. She'd love to support you!

📩 Subscribe to the weekly newsletter http://bit.ly/2gYQMlA so you never miss an episode.

💬 Share this with a friend who's a mom.

👩🏼‍🎓Take it to the next level and join the Love Your Life School http://theloveyourlifeschool.com/

📸 Tag me on Instagram @smb.wellness https://instagram.com/smb.wellness so I can cheer you on!

Feeling stuck in midlife? You're not broken. And you're not behind.

In this episode, I'm offering a gentle pause. A loving interruption. A moment to step out of autopilot and actually look at the life you're living.

If January started with hope, energy, or a word of the year… and now you feel tired, discouraged, or disconnected from that version of yourself, this conversation is for you.

I walk you through how to reflect on the last three months without judgment, why most change efforts fail even when we care deeply, and what actually helps us feel calmer, more grounded, and more hopeful in midlife.

This episode is not about doing more.
It's about doing what you're doing differently in two ways.

Inside, we talk about:
• Why feeling stuck in midlife is more common than we admit
• How self compassion creates change faster than criticism
• The power of tiny daily actions and the 1 percent better approach
• Why starting small is not weakness, it's wisdom
• How to choose one doable shift that future you will thank you for

If you've been taking care of everyone else and quietly wondering when it's your turn… this is it.

You don't need a total life overhaul.
You need a pause.
A breath.
And one small step forward.

Click play.

I'm so glad you found this episode. Let's go.

ENJOY THE SHOW?

• If you liked this episode, you'll like this one:

Tame your Inner Critic on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/253-tame-your-inner-critic/id1434429161?i=1000616931135

Tame your Inner Critic on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/5QFpXdcWBmCon14djNnQnq?si=Q0SYYjPHQBug_FBmF_7Yhw

• Don't miss out: Get weekly wellness tips straight to your inbox: https://SMBwell.com/newsletter

• ⭐️Get on Coach Susie's one-on-one schedule here: https://smbwell.com/work-with-me/

• 🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP with the foundations of emotional intelligence and mental wellness here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap

• Buy Susie a virtual coffee and keep the show AD-free! https://patreon.com/susiepettit

• Don't miss an episode, subscribe via Apple Podcasts or follow on Spotify, or Amazon Music.

• Leave us a review in Apple Podcasts.

• Get the full show notes here: https://SMBwell.com/398

• Find and follow her on YouTube

What if feeling calmer, healthier, and more energized at midlife wasn't about doing more but about stopping a few things that quietly drain you?

In this episode, I share five things I stopped doing at age 50 that made an immediate difference in my mental health, energy, and overall well-being.

These aren't trendy hacks or extreme rules. They are small but powerful shifts that helped me feel lighter in my body, clearer in my mind, and more present in my life.

If you started the year with good intentions but feel like life pulled you right back into old patterns, this episode is your permission slip to begin again.

Inside this episode, I talk about:

⭐️One habit I stopped that dramatically improved my sleep and long-term health

⭐️Why being "normal" often works against mental wellness

⭐️The surprising mindset shift that helped me feel more confident in my body

⭐️A decision I made for my mental health that most women are never encouraged to question

⭐️How compassion, not self-criticism, creates real change

This conversation is especially for women who spend more time managing everyone else's lives than paying attention to their own. You do not need more discipline. You do not need to be perfect. You need awareness, self-trust, and a willingness to start small.

🤓Next week on the show, I'll be talking about the power of habits and getting 1 percent better, so think of this episode as the spark that helps you decide where to begin.

If you liked this episode, you'll like this one:

5 Questions for a Quick Life Audit on Apple Podcast:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/5-questions-for-a-quick-life-audit-happiness-series/id1434429161?i=1000625340692

5 Questions for a Quick Life Audit on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4mUd7OQEWJ0Xvl1opfGQco?si=021f43c8a5cb4ad5

📩 Don't miss out: Get weekly wellness tips straight to your inbox: Get the weekly newsletter here: https://SMBwell.com/newsletter

⭐️Get on Coach Susie's one-on-one schedule here: https://smbwell.com/work-with-me/

🤓FIRST TIME LISTENER? Grab the PODCAST ROADMAP with the foundations of emotional intelligence and mental wellness here: https://SMBwell.com/roadmap

👩🏼‍🎓The Love Your Life School Membership-http://theLoveYourLifeSchool.com

🙌🏾 Buy Susie a coffee (and support small business and Susie's mission: https://patreon.com/susiepettit 🙏🏾

🩷Let's be friends on Instagram-https://instagram.com/smb.wellness

🌟Get the full show notes here👉🏾 https://SMBwell.com/

📺THIS VIDEO IS ON YOUTUBE! Find and follow her on YouTube-LOVE YOUR LIFE VLOG - YouTube

Have you ever felt like the unofficial caretaker of your family or the one who must hold everything together?

In this conversation with Adaku Mbagwu, founder of Healed Hero, we talk about what it really feels like to be the one everyone turns to. Whether you are an eldest daughter or simply someone who learned early to carry more than your share, this episode will help you see your patterns with more clarity and compassion.

Adaku and I explore how birth order shapes our identity, the quiet pressure high performers internalize, and why so many of us grow up believing our value comes from holding everything together. The insights she brings are powerful, relatable, and deeply grounding for anyone who has ever felt tired from being the dependable one.

And don't worry - since this is the Love Your Life Show, we dig into the healing side too. Adaku walks us through the early steps of reclaiming your energy and agency so you can feel lighter in your relationships and steadier in your daily life. Her framework of strategic vulnerability is a game changer, especially for women who have armored up for decades.

Much of what she shares echoes what we know about healing attachment wounds and chronic over responsibility, yet she presents it in a way that feels accessible and hopeful. If you are ready to shift out of perfectionism, people pleasing, and overfunctioning, this conversation will feel like a warm invitation to finally choose yourself.

If you liked this show, you'll like this one:

How to Communicate with Narcissists and Emotionally Immature People on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-communicate-with-narcissists-and/id1434429161?i=1000711108596

How to Communicate with Narcissists and Emotionally Immature People on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/episode/0FTaNbB8tCwPfI0sLyix92?si=f4e7f0afc68d4bd5

Get all the links we mentioned and connect with Adaku Mbagwu go here👉🏾https://SMBwell.com/396

📩 Subscribe to the weekly newsletter so you never miss an episode.

💬 Share this with a friend who's a first born or eldest daughter.

👩🏼‍🎓Take it to the next level and join the Love Your Life School

📸 Tag me on Instagram @smb.wellness so I can cheer you on!