Secure attached people don't beg or chase when an avoidant wants to breakup. They also know when to call it quits...and in this episode - that is what we are discussing.

We will discuss...

- a secure attached timeline to a deciding a breakup,

- how they communicate breaking up

- what they heal during breakup

- how they respond when avoidant circles back

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They act like they are over you the moment you breakup and that is crushing. But is that what they really feel?

There are lot of "experts" on what avoidant attached person feel during breakups. I have on average 70 avoidant attached people on speed dial and I am sharing what they all say they go through during breakups. It's astounding how they all have the same breakup story.

Leave a comment and let me know your thoughts on this podcast.

Much love,

Annalisa

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I wish someone had told me this when I first started dating.

I made so many mistakes that landed me in some questionable relationships. The tips I share here has helped me choose a partner I enjoy life with.

I'm breaking down the red flags to look out for, the green ones to pay attention to, the pace to move at so you don't end up with someone who blindsides you.

This would help if you've been dating someone for a while or if you're now getting into the dating work.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.

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What happens when you've been in a long distance romance with an avoidant attached person and it feels intense even if you've just met a handful of times? You want answers...

What is happening here?

Can this be anything more?

Why do they ghost me and return?

As Sarah shares her stories, we try to find her answers that would soothe her troubles heart.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.

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What happens when you have been friends for what seems like forever - you lose each other and find each other and in your older years decide to date but then to be blindsided by the avoidants pull away???

Sarah shares her journey through friendship to falling in love with her friend and then the heartbreaking pulling away that started a journey into examining her anxious attachment style and healing.

This is for you if you've ever been confused about your relationship going great and then suddenly coming to a halt.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.

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Social media will tell you that anxious-avoidant relationships are doomed. That avoidants are narcissists. That anxious people are just codependent. I'm here to tell you that's oversimplified BS that keeps people stuck.

In this episode, I'm breaking down the anxious-avoidant dynamic with the nuance it actually deserves. After healing my own anxious attachment and being in a relationship with someone who's fearful-avoidant and has been actively working in therapy for over three years, I've learned that this isn't about finding a villain - it's about two nervous systems trying to feel safe in completely different ways.

We're covering:

• The protest-withdrawal cycle: what it actually looks like and why it happens
• 4 damaging myths social media spreads about this dynamic (and why they're wrong)
• What secure attachment would actually do in these moments - not as theory, but as a real, usable framework
• How to hold both empathy AND boundaries at the same time
• The real questions to ask yourself if you're in this cycle right now
• Why "just stop chasing" and "just communicate better" aren't solutions -they're oversimplifications

This episode doesn't tell you to leave or stay. It gives you the tools to make that decision from a grounded, informed place. Because you deserve relationships that feel secure, and you're capable of creating that - but only if you're willing to do your own work.

Whether you're anxious, avoidant, or watching this pattern play out in your relationship, this one's for you.

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Annalisa answers followers questions.

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What happens when someone who is working on their attachment style meets with an avoidant attached style person who may not be working on their healing - they set boundaries. How does that work out? Listen to this podcast as Sarah explains the hot and too heavy too soon dynamics of her relationship, setting boundaries and what happened next.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.

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