In episode 156, Shelby dives into the topic of comparative righteousness and explores how alienated parents can move past rigid right-wrong thinking. She categorizes four types of mindsets parents like us might fall into: the over analyzer, the justice seeker, the rigid role model, and the personal martyr. Shelby discusses the cognitive biases involved in these mindsets, such as all-or-nothing thinking, confirmation bias, naive realism, group bias, and the implications these have on our mental and emotional well-being. Emphasizing the importance of curiosity, compassion, and understanding, Shelby provides practical prompts and gentler phrasing alternatives for interactions with co-parents and children. She also delves into the roots of right-wrong thinking from both a neuroscientific and psychological perspective, encouraging listeners to adopt a more balanced and introspective approach in dealing with their experiences of parental alienation.

00:00 Introduction and Welcome

00:29 Listener Review and Reflections

03:57 Understanding Right-Wrong Thinking

15:58 The Over Analyzer Parent

22:58 The Justice Seeker Parent

31:37 The Rigid Role Model Parent

38:02 The Personal Martyr Parent

46:01 Origins of Right-Wrong Mindset

49:01 Understanding the Appeal of Outrage

51:20 The Role of Ego in Outrage

55:10 Client Case Study: Overcoming Victim Mindset

01:04:05 Recognizing and Shifting Rigid Mindsets

01:15:17 Practical Communication Strategies

01:24:43 Final Thoughts and Reflections

Navigating the Emotional Turbulence of Parental Alienation: Episode 155

In this episode, host Shelby Milford dives deep into understanding the emotional and physical symptoms children may exhibit as a result of parental alienation. Shelby, drawing from her expertise as a twice-certified life coach specializing in post-traumatic growth, shares personal anecdotes and discusses attachment theory, emotional regulation, and practical tools for alienated parents. Listeners will learn how to create a supportive environment for their children, manage their own mental health, and effectively navigate the complexities of alienated parent-child relationships.

00:00 Introduction and Announcements

01:21 Today's Topic: Attachment Theory and Child's Health

02:13 Personal Health Update and Reflections

05:35 Listener Reviews and Feedback

08:41 Understanding Children's Symptoms and Guilt

10:38 Personal Stories of Seizures and Parenting Challenges

23:08 Attachment Theory and Emotional Responses

27:58 Understanding Attachment Theory

28:54 Child's Response to Alienating Parent

30:12 False Self and Emotional Suppression

32:27 Transition Periods and Emotional Release

34:20 Balancing Blame and Self-Care

44:18 Helping Your Child Regulate Emotions

48:09 Documenting and Self-Care Strategies

55:33 Concluding Thoughts and Encouragement

Understanding and Healing Attachment Styles

In this episode of The Beyond The High Road Podcast, host Shelby Milford discusses the importance of understanding and healing attachment styles for alienated parents. She explains the different attachment styles - secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized - and how these influence emotional reactions, coping mechanisms, and parent-child relationships, especially in the context of alienation. Shelby emphasizes the significance of developing self-awareness, practicing self-compassion, and seeking supportive relationships. The episode provides actionable steps toward fostering secure attachment and enhancing emotional regulation to improve parent-child interactions and overall well-being for alienated parents.

How Unhealed Trauma Can Lead to Self Sabotage: https://www.beyondthehighroad.com/blog/how-unhealed-trauma-can-lead-to-self-sabotage-in-alienation

00:00 Introduction and Welcome

00:34 Listener Engagement and Reviews

02:29 Introduction to Attachment Styles

03:08 Understanding Attachment Theory

07:30 Exploring Different Attachment Styles

11:43 Impact of Attachment Styles on Relationships

19:59 Personal Experiences with Attachment Styles

34:30 Attachment Styles and Parenting

38:32 Understanding Emotional Regulation

39:05 Collecting Data from Your Past

39:58 Shifting Towards Secure Attachment

40:24 Developing Self-Awareness

41:33 Practicing Self-Compassion

43:42 Engaging in Therapy or Coaching

48:38 Repairing Self-Beliefs

51:42 Building Emotional Regulation Skills

54:14 Seeking Corrective Relationships

01:03:35 Three Behaviors for Secure Attachment

01:12:45 Recap and Final Thoughts