Why Him? Why Her?

Finding Real Love by Understanding Your Personality Type

By: Helen Fisher

Narrated by: Helen Fisher

Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins

Publisher's summary

The national best-selling book Why Him? Why Her? shows how a better understanding of who you are will help you find and keep the love you want

Why do you fall in love with one person rather than another?

In this fascinating and informative book, Helen Fisher, one of the world's leading experts on romantic love, unlocks the hidden code of desire and attachment. Each of us, it turns out, primarily expresses one of four broad personality types - Explorer, Builder, Director, or Negotiator - and each of these types is governed by different chemical systems in the brain. Driven by this biology, we are attracted to partners who both mirror and complement our own personality type. Until now the search for love has been blind, but Fisher pulls back the curtain and reveals how we unconsciously go about finding the right match.

Drawing on her unique study of 40,000 men and women, she explores each personality type in detail and shows you how to identify your own type. Then she explains why some types match up well, whereas others are problematic. (Note to Explorers: be prepared for a wild ride when you hitch your star to a fellow Explorer!) Ultimately, Fisher's investigation into the complex nature of romance and attachment leads to astonishing new insights into the essence of dating, love, and marriage.

Based on entirely new research - including a detailed questionnaire completed by five million people in 33 countries - Why Him? Why Her? will change your understanding of why you love him (or her) and help you use nature's chemistry to find and keep your life partner.

Download the accompanying reference guide.

©2009 Helen Fisher (P)2009 Macmillan Audio

Enlightening

Helen Fisher is brilliant and vulnerable. She speaks as an expert but also as a student of love, which makes this more like a terrific extension of her Ted talk.

Amazing

This book is very insightful and so direct to the point. Very easy to understand .

Educational

Any additional comments?

This is very educational. I did not exactly get what I thought I was going to. It is interesting to learn the background of Match.com. I discovered that I am one of the people that seems to be well balance in all areas. So, I do not feel like I know who to better to look or select a partner.

Extremely informative.

Where does Why Him? Why Her? rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

Ranks pretty well with that genre of books i.e. human personalities and social psychology

What was your reaction to the ending? (No spoilers please!)

I was confused as I related to everything that the author talk about without having a specific type.

Which scene was your favorite?

cant really say

What insight do you think you’ll apply from Why Him? Why Her??

Being able to profile people and understand their dominant personality traits out of the four (Builder, Explorer, Negotiator, or Director). Personally, I was found myself in the four traits which was confusing.

Any additional comments?

I think we humans are a complicated bunch of emotions and motives. The book is an interesting viewpoint on personality types and compatibility.

Interesting and Compelling

What did you like best about this story?

I enjoyed the science in understanding behavioral and personality traits that we may be born with. I found the Nature vs Nurture compelling. Who would have thought you could be born with a predisposition for even political views?! Worth more study for sure. As to how we choose our mates and either stay in or leave relationships, well we parted ways in some areas and agreed in others. Overall a very interesting book. I will revisit often I am sure. Reading people is a large part of my work, and this study was helpful.

A highly practical book

This book exceeded my expectations. To be honest, I've never seriously read any conceptions about human personality traits, and so I cannot qualify it in comparison to anything. Nevertheless, I think this book to be very efficient -- it provides a clear description of the author's suggested personality types, so clear, that you can construct a mental "filter" and easily predict a personality type of somebody you interact with or somebody you are being told about. With some practice, you may achieve a possibility to predict one's actions and reactions, based on your knowledge of personality types.

Sidesteps Attachment Disorders

It was decent material, don't get me wrong. I just don't understand how her character types work when you couple them with attachment disorders that she only mentions in passing. I'm not completely sure what the target age group is for this material but if you're trying to date again at 40 like I was... ignore attachment disorders at your own peril.

Interesting read

If you could sum up Why Him? Why Her? in three words, what would they be?

Intriguing . Nice read . Informative

What did you like best about this story?

Gave me so much insight on my personality and the personality of my significant other

She pegged me!

I was skeptical, but I'm generally very interested in this kind of thing and from the test I determined I was a negotiator/explorer and just the way she explained that type had me feeling very unoriginal lol. But I'm impressed by this and I happen to find something about her voice soothing so I'm glad she narrorated her own book. Nothing particularly mind blowing but if you're into understanding chemistry/personality/courtship junk you'll love it!

read too fast

the reader read too fast with pressured voice making the listen tiresome and not able to complete. The infirmation was however intetesting and informative. It is my tendency to prefer books read by the author.