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The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change?
- A Woman's Guide to Deciding Whether to Stay or Go
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 7 hrs and 20 mins
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Publisher's summary
In this groundbreaking follow-up to her best-selling books The Verbally Abusive Relationship and Controlling People, Patricia Evans goes beyond identifying verbally abusive behaviors to prescribing a course of action for both victim and abuser. Coupling stories of abused women and abusive men from her own case studies, Evans gives you the tools you need to transform your relationship. Most important, she assures you that such a transformation is possible—given the right circumstances. Evans also helps you determine if your abuser really has changed—or if he’s merely creating the illusion of change. And if he hasn’t changed, Evans helps you decide whether it’s time to leave the relationship—and what to do when it is.
Combining practical applications and the latest clinical research with her trademark support and assurance, Evans shows you how to empower yourself, improve your relationship, and change your life for the better.
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Amazing SELF GROWTH
- By Tina Payne on 12-10-20
By: Beverly Engel
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When Loving Him Is Hurting You
- Hope and Help for Women Dealing with Narcissism and Emotional Abuse
- By: Dr. David Hawkins
- Narrated by: Jim Denison
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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You fell in love with him. But over time you've come to realize he's in love with himself - and you feel trapped. His needs, his problems, and his plans always seem to take precedence over yours. Dr. David Hawkins, director of the Marriage Recovery Center, offers a guide to help you identify signs of narcissism, understand how your loved one's issues are affecting you, and prepare a biblical game plan for freeing yourself to live courageously in light of God's love.
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The book I so desperately needed to read
- By Julia on 05-26-18
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When Dad Hurts Mom
- Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 10 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Can my partner abuse me and still be a good parent? Should I stay with my partner for my children's sake? How should I talk to my children about the abuse and help them heal? Am I a bad mother? Mothers in physically or emotionally abusive relationships ask themselves these questions every day. Whether it's physical or "just" emotional abuse, whether it's aimed at them or you, whether they see or hear it, your kids need you.
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Great information. Not the best narrator.
- By RT on 06-28-19
By: Lundy Bancroft
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The Emotionally Destructive Marriage
- How to Find Your Voice and Reclaim Your Hope
- By: Leslie Vernick
- Narrated by: Leslie Vernick
- Length: 6 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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You can't put it into words, but something is happening to you. Your stomach churns, your heart aches, and the tension in your marriage is making you feel weary and a little crazy. The constant criticism, disrespect, cruelty, deceit, and gross indifference are eroding your confidence and breaking your spirit. For any woman caught in an emotionally destructive marriage, Leslie Vernick offers a personalized path forward.
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I wish this book had been written 10 years ago
- By D. C. Williams on 09-08-14
By: Leslie Vernick
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5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life
- Identifying and Dealing with Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other High-Conflict Personalities
- By: Bill Eddy
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 5 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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When a high-conflict person has one of five common personality disorders - borderline, narcissistic, paranoid, antisocial, or histrionic - they can lash out in risky extremes of emotion and aggression. And once an HCP decides to target you, they're hard to shake. But there are ways to protect yourself. Using empathy-driven conflict management techniques, Bill Eddy, a lawyer and therapist with extensive mediation experience, will teach you to spot warning signs of the five high-conflict personalities in others and in yourself.
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This book should be required reading.
- By JGM on 05-07-18
By: Bill Eddy
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The Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist
- Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse
- By: Debbie Mirza
- Narrated by: Debbie Mirza
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse is the most comprehensive and helpful audiobook on the topic of covert narcissism. This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused.
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This book CHANGED MY LIFE!
- By Mojo on 12-19-18
By: Debbie Mirza
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Stop Hurting the Woman You Love
- Breaking the Cycle of Abusive Behavior
- By: Charlie Donaldson MA, Randy Flood MA, Elaine Eldridge PhD
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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End the cycle of abuse-for good. Authors Charlie Donaldson, Randy Flood, and Elaine Eldridge uncover a proven action plan that violent men can use to change their behavior. Filled with insightful questionnaires and actual case histories, the essential how-to book Stop Hurting the Woman You Love, will help end abusive patterns in favor of healthier, happier relationships....
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eye opening to say the least
- By Amazon Customer on 08-03-21
By: Charlie Donaldson MA, and others
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Dangerous Personalities
- An FBI Profiler Shows You How to Identify and Protect Yourself from Harmful People
- By: Joe Navarro, Toni Sciarra Poynter
- Narrated by: Stephen Hoye
- Length: 7 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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In Dangerous Personalities, former FBI profiler Joe Navarro shows listeners how to identify the four most common "dangerous personalities", and analyze how much of a threat each one can be: the Narcissist, the Predator, the Paranoid, and the Unstable Personality. Along the way, listeners learn how to protect themselves both immediately and long-term - as well as how to recover from the trauma of being close to such a destructive force.
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A Bad Conscience
- By Mel on 10-29-14
By: Joe Navarro, and others
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It’s My Life Now: Starting Over After an Abusive Relationship, 3rd Edition
- By: Meg Kennedy Dugan, Roger R. Hock PhD
- Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
- Length: 6 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Now in its third edition, It's My Life Now is a guide for survivors who have left an abusive relationship. It addresses - in clear, non-threatening language - various issues associated with abuse and violence, including post-relationship emotions, psychological impact, dealing with children, personal safety, legal problems, and financial security. Each chapter dismantles common myths about being in and leaving an abusive relationship and contains activities for self-exploration that survivors can complete as they navigate a new life free from abuse.
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Hard to hear but valuable to the soul!
- By Jenna Giberson on 05-13-20
By: Meg Kennedy Dugan, and others
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Healing from Hidden Abuse
- A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse
- By: Shannon Thomas LCSW
- Narrated by: Wendy Tremont King
- Length: 6 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Within every community, toxic people can be found hiding in families, couples, companies, and places of worship. The cryptic nature of psychological abuse involves repetitious mind games played by one individual or a group of people. Psychological abuse leaves no bruises. There are no broken bones. There are no holes in the walls. The bruises, brokenness, and holes are held tightly within the target of the abuse.
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Proceed with caution
- By Kamel on 10-17-18
What listeners say about The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change?
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Barbara M.
- 08-03-17
We knew the answer all along
The author attempts to answer the question each of us have asked ourselves. Perhaps it works for a rare insightful men. We knew all along they are not going to change. I found the audiobook worth listening to, anyway, a welcome change from the usual advice to run to a shelter. Good luck, ladies.
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- Amazon Customer
- 05-12-21
I strongly recommend this
Context: I’ve been a relationship for 9+ years. I paired this with the other audio book, The Verbally Abusive Relationship.
I liked the performance. The narrator does a good job emphasizing the point. The story/content is valuable. It was able to explain and help me plan/proceed with how I wanted to handle my verbally abusive relationship. We are going to therapy together, while that may not be the end all be all, my partner is really doing this because he WANTS to for himself. I followed the steps to the best of my ability from the book, and it really determined our place in the relationship. 10/10 I would definitely recommend this to someone who feels as though they are not heard in the relationship.
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- Andrea E. Bacchi
- 07-08-23
Excellent book. Eye-opening.
The book is well written and helped me understand things much more. The explanations and examples are incredibly helpful.
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- Nadine Fish
- 06-24-14
Worst narrater ever!
What didn’t you like about Laural Merlington’s performance?
She sounded like a tape recorder does when it is put on the slow motion function; it was almost painful at times to listen to her.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Dr. Sabatier
- 11-04-18
amazing
highly recommend
change is essential
an insight ful perspective to the thinking and behaviors of venally abusive
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- Kayleigh Mack
- 12-06-22
Necessary for women and men alike
This book clearly defines verbal abuse and highlights a means of either correcting the behavior in a relationship or emboldens women to leave when hope is truly lost.
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- LLLTyler
- 04-16-18
Life Saving
This is my first time reading The Verbally Abusive Man.
I also just finished “Controlling People” for second time in the last 10 years. First time was recommended by my marriage counselor. I knew without a douby my husband was controlling. But; by the time I was done with that book, I also realized I had controlling behaviors as well. Unexpectedly, it also taught me how I was defining my daughter and controlling her as well. A lot of my terminology in day to day parenting and conversations changed. I stopped telling my daughter things like “you’re not hungry, your body is just tired, and you need to go back to bed and get sleep”.
I changed it to, “I understand. You could very well be hungry. Usually, when we need to eat it’s because we need more calories for energy. You just had dinner 2 hours ago, and it’s time for bed. Sometimes the body confuses being tired with being hungry. When we need to eat our body releases a hormone called ghrelin that makes us think “I’m hungry”. And, when we’re overly tired, or stressed, the same hunger-sparking hormones appear and gives us hunger pangs...” Then, after a couple questions and a glass of water, or maybe even a compromise like a stick of celery, she was off to bed. I didn’t realize the importance of these things until reading this book. Her book isn’t about parenting necessarily. But, rather it outlines a lot of how the result of parental abuse can lead to kids being abusive and controlling adults. In the end, after reading this book, my husband became physically abusive and that led to divorce. I’m now remarried and don’t want to repeat history. After to my new husband (same text book pattern) he beccame verbally abusive. This time, it was a lot easier to see and understand as a result of my past.
This book “The Verbally Abusive Man” gave me tools on how to respond and handle it, and “The Agreement”. My husband and I now live seperatly while working on our marriage, as he continues to go to counseling to resolve his childhood hurts and communication styles. Meanwhile, my daughter and I are healing and recovering from the trauma and attend counseling as work to towards bringing our family back together again. It hasn’t been easy ... but I think it’ll be worth it. THANK YOU PATRICIA EVANS for saving my life. and my spirit.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Nichole Mcintosh
- 06-27-20
Gives you an Action Plan
It was a comprehensive discussion on verbal abuse. Patricia describes how historically women have been told who they are and what they think & feel by men. It provides real-life examples of what statements are abusive. Confessions from partners who've experienced the abuse and the abusers themselves. She walks through a step-by-step plan to help make your decision to stay or end the relationship. Calling out that change is essential.
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1 person found this helpful
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- curious23m
- 08-16-15
A gift to the emotionally violated
Patricia Evans is a brilliant, compassionate author. There is no author I've found who gets down into the deepest trenches of relational dynamics to explain the underlying issues of so many relationships. You could see countless therapists and not even come close to having your confusion, pain, and emotional anguish validated as you would in this book and the others by Evans. The next steps and tools provided in this book are a great addition to the other books that focus more on discovery and gaining knowledge and validation. Evans takes her profound gift in understanding controlling and verbally abusive behaviors one step further and provides guidance to help you figure out if your partner can change. I'm afraid you may never pick up this book because you aren't aware of what verbal abuse really is and how subtle it can be. It may sound like something you've never had to deal with, and you might be thanking God you haven't when you actually have! I challenge you to open your mind and discover how prevalent verbal abuse really is. Perhaps even those of us who rarely indulge in abusive behaviors would rather never indulge but didn't know we were doing so. We have grown so much as a society, but we have a long way to go. Oppression comes in many forms and Evans is leading the path to recovery for all of us.
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8 people found this helpful
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- michele ballantyne
- 08-03-18
Perfect capstone
This book is a perfect capstone to Patricia Evans the verbally abusive relationship and controlling people.
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