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Love by Design
- 6 Ingredients to Build a Lifetime of Love
- Narrated by: Nikki Massoud, Dr. Sara Nasserzadeh
- Length: 12 hrs and 53 mins
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Love by Design
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Publisher's summary
“Revolutionize your relationship," redefine romance, and build the loving connections you yearn for with this new paradigm for love that will help couples who feel disillusioned, disconnected, or unfulfilled (Dr. Pepper Schwartz).
Many of us were raised with the idea that true love means finding our "other half" and that a spark is the best foundation for successful long-term partnerships and marriages. But what if this understanding is flawed?
Grounded in two decades of original research and work with couples from around the world, Love by Design introduces a groundbreaking new foundation for love: The Emergent Love Model. As Dr. Nasserzadeh knows, successful partnerships do not thrive on love, at least as we know it. Instead of chasing our butterflies we need to cultivate six core relational ingredients that make it possible for love to emerge:
- Attraction: What do you like and value about each other?
- Respect: How do you keep each other’s needs and priorities in mind?
- Trust: Do you know that you will show up for each other consistently?
- Compassion: Can you honor the other’s emotional experience without making it about you?
- Shared vision: Where are you committed to going together?
- Loving behaviors: How do you show your partner they’re special to you?
Offering dozens of exercises and reflection prompts, this groundbreaking book—perfect for fans of 8 Rules of Love or The Love Prescription—will give listeners a new foundation for their coupledom—one that will help your coupledom thrive for a lifetime.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
Critic reviews
“A revelatory re-conceptualization of how we create love. No other book so seamlessly blends scientific evidence with diversity and acceptance.”—Dr. Emily Nagoski, bestselling author of Come As You Are and Burnout
“Dr. Nasserzadeh is an important relationship scholar and gifted clinician. Her vision of Emergent Love will revolutionize your relationship.”—Dr. Pepper Schwartz, Professor of Sociology at the University of Washington and New York Times bestselling author
"Love by Design is an essential read for those looking to cultivate connected and fulfilling intimate relationships. Her model of emergent love will transform how you enter your next relationship or enliven the one you are in for years to come."—Alexandra H. Solomon, PhD, faculty at Northwestern University, bestselling author of Love Every Day and host of the podcast, Reimagining Love
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Story5 out of 5 stars 5
As the first medical director and attending psychiatrist at the World Trade Center Mental Health Program, Dr. Sue Varma worked directly with civilian and first-responder survivors in the aftermath of 9/11. There, she met people at every point of the stress and trauma continuum. She saw devastation and stagnancy as much as she saw amazing resilience and growth. She asked herself: how do some people survive, even thrive, despite profound challenges? And how can we optimize the things we have control over, while buffering ourselves from stress?
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5 out of 5 stars
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A Very Helpful Book
- By @DrCarlHoffman on 05-03-24
By: Sue Varma MD
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Unlearning Shame
- How We Can Reject Self-Blame Culture and Reclaim Our Power
- By: Devon Price PhD
- Narrated by: Devon Price PhD
- Length: 9 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 15
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 15
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Story5 out of 5 stars 15
Systemic Shame is the socially engineered self-loathing that says we are solely to blame for our circumstances. It teaches that our consumption is moral and personal choice is our only tool of change. Systemic Shame tells us that poverty is remedied by hard-working people pulling themselves up by their bootstraps, that marginalized people are responsible for their own oppression, and that massive global crises like climate change can be solved by switching to paper straws. When we inevitably blame ourselves for failing to do enough to combat structural injustices, we feel Systemic Shame.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Yes!
- By PaulC on 05-07-24
By: Devon Price PhD
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The 5 Resets
- Rewire Your Brain and Body for Less Stress and More Resilience
- By: Aditi Nerurkar
- Narrated by: Aditi Nerurkar
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 14
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 14
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 14
For Dr. Nerurkar, the common misperception of stress as “bad” needs reframing. Stress is a healthy biological phenomenon that helps us tackle life’s many demands. It becomes problematic when it’s out of tune with the frequency of our lives, resulting in burnout, fatigue, sleep disturbances, and many other physical symptoms. To bring stress back to healthy levels, Dr. Nerurkar offers her five science-backed mindset shifts, rooted in more than two decades of clinical experience, for when life gets hard.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Practical and Doable!
- By Brandy on 04-09-24
By: Aditi Nerurkar
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Fight Right
- How Successful Couples Turn Conflict Into Connection
- By: Julie Schwartz Gottman PhD, John Gottman PhD
- Narrated by: Roy Worley, Kiiri Sandy
- Length: 10 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 130
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 121
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Story5 out of 5 stars 121
How we fight predicts the future of our relationships. Most of us blunder into conflict without knowing what we are really fighting about and then quickly become overwhelmed by physiological responses we can’t control and emotions we don’t anticipate. The truth is the happiest and most successful couples fight—all the time. Conflict is human, and necessary.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Excellent summary of their research
- By Robert B. Davis on 02-28-24
By: Julie Schwartz Gottman PhD, and others
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The Other Significant Others
- Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center
- By: Rhaina Cohen
- Narrated by: Rhaina Cohen
- Length: 8 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 48
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 47
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 47
Why do we assume romantic relationships are more important than friendships? What do we lose when we expect a spouse to meet all our needs? And what can we learn about commitment, love, and family from people who put deep friendship at the center of their lives? In The Other Significant Others, NPR's Rhaina Cohen invites us into the lives of people who have defied convention by choosing a friend as a life partner—these are friends who are home co-owners, co-parents or each other’s caregivers.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Best book I’ve read in a while, and I will definitely recommend it!
- By Destiny DiMattei on 02-24-24
By: Rhaina Cohen
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Secure Love
- Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime
- By: Julie Menanno
- Narrated by: Julie Menanno
- Length: 10 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 51
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 49
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Story5 out of 5 stars 49
A good question, in theory, but expert couple’s therapist Julie Menanno wants you to consider: what does a securely attached relationship feel like?The answer to this question is the ultimate goal in Secure Love, a groundbreaking guide to understanding secure attachment in adult relationships. While attachment theory has grown in popularity to explain the relationship between children and their caregivers, it’s also the closest science has come to making sense of our adult romantic connections.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Just What I Needed
- By Anonymous User on 04-04-24
By: Julie Menanno