Showing results by narrator "Arte Johnson"

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    • V Wars

    • A Chronicle of the Vampire Wars
    • By: Jonathan Maberry, Nancy Holder, John Everson, and others
    • Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell, Gabrielle de Cuir, Roxanne Hernadez, and others
    • Length: 18 hrs and 27 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 718
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 663
    • Story
      4 out of 5 stars 664

    In this sweeping, threaded narrative of the global phenomenon known as the Vampire Wars, mankind is unwittingly infected by a millennia-old bacteria unknowingly exhumed by a scientific expedition in Antarctica. Now, in some rare cases, a person’s so-called junk DNA becomes activated. Depending on their racial and ethnic heritage, they begin to manifest one of the many diverse forms of the "others" that are the true basis for the legends of supernatural creatures. These aren’t your usual vampires and werewolves - it goes much deeper than that.

    • 4 out of 5 stars
    • A Ringside Seat for the Vampire Wars

    • By Flavius Krakdaddius on 03-19-13

    Regular price: $24.47

    • Bad Monkey

    • By: Carl Hiaasen
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 11 hrs and 25 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 1,636
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 1,454
    • Story
      4 out of 5 stars 1,460

    Andrew Yancy - late of the Miami Police and soon-to-be-late of the Monroe County sheriff’s office - has a human arm in his freezer. There’s a logical (Hiaasenian) explanation for that, but not for how and why it parted from its shadowy owner. Yancy thinks the boating-accident/shark-luncheon explanation is full of holes, and if he can prove murder, the sheriff might rescue him from his grisly Health Inspector gig (it’s not called the roach patrol for nothing). But first - this being Hiaasen country - Yancy must negotiate an obstacle course of wildly unpredictable events with a crew of even more wildly unpredictable characters.

    • 3 out of 5 stars
    • Disappointed

    • By James on 06-14-13

    Regular price: $28.00

    • The Poetry of Robert Frost

    • By: Robert Frost
    • Narrated by: Susan Anspach, Roscoe Lee Browne, Elliott Gould, and others
    • Length: 1 hr and 40 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 69
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 62
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 62

    Two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. Drawing upon everyday incidents, common situations, and rural imagery, Robert Frost fashioned poetry of great lyrical beauty and potent symbolism. His language is simple, clear, and colloquial, yet dense with meaning and wider significance.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Beautifully performed masterpieces!

    • By Vicky on 02-16-16

    Regular price: $9.07

    • Dance of the Reptiles

    • Rampaging Tourists, Marauding Pythons, Larcenous Legislators, Crazed Celebrities, and Tar-Balled Beaches: Selected Columns
    • By: Carl Hiaasen, Diane Stevenson (editor)
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 12 hrs and 42 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      3.5 out of 5 stars 127
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 117
    • Story
      3.5 out of 5 stars 117

    If you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, best-selling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best of Hiaasen's Miami Herald columns, which lay bare the stories - large and small - that demonstrate anew that truth is far stranger than fiction. Hiaasen offers his commentary - indignant, disbelieving, sometimes righteously angry, and frequently hilarious - on burning issues like animal welfare, polluted rivers, and the broken criminal justice system as well as the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, Bernie Madoff's trial, and the shenanigans of the recent presidential elections.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Great book. Required reading!

    • By Ron on 02-12-14

    Regular price: $31.50

    • The Willoughbys

    • By: Lois Lowry
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 2 hrs and 56 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 100
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 77
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 80

    Abandoned by their ill-humored parents to the care of an odious nanny, Tim, the twins, Barnaby A and Barnaby B, and their sister, Jane, attempt to fulfill their roles as good old-fashioned children.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Unexpectedly delightful! A treasured keeper!

    • By Fay on 09-03-12

    Regular price: $19.93

    • Dave Barry Does Japan

    • By: Dave Barry
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 4 hrs and 26 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 215
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 95
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 94

    Without bothering to get approval from the President, the State Department, or even the FTC, Dave Barry's publishers sent him to Tokyo. You'd think they would have known better. Now the word is Barry has set back our diplomatic relations with the whole Pacific Rim by a couple of decades. Japanese culture, dining, sport, and industry all come under Barry's relentless scrutiny.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Uplifting and fun

    • By S. Blaine on 04-30-03

    Regular price: $14.95

    • Toasts

    • By: Paul Dickson
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 5 hrs and 38 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    For nearly 30 years, Paul Dickson's Toasts has been the the perfect reference for any occasion where one needs to raise a glass. Organized by category, it contains sayings famous and profound, suitable and sentimental. Covering births, weddings, graduations, and other events both major and minor, Dickson also provides a history of the toast, and a guide on how to do it well. Revised for the first time since 1991, this new audio edition of Toasts is as useful as ever.

    Regular price: $18.19

    • Pastwatch

    • The Redemption of Christopher Columbus
    • By: Orson Scott Card
    • Narrated by: Scott Brick, Christopher Cazenove, Gabrielle de Cuir, and others
    • Length: 13 hrs and 35 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 988
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 669
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 673

    In a not-too-distant future that is not quite ours, there has been a major scientific breakthrough. It is a way to open windows into the past, permitting historical researchers to view, but not participate, in the events of the past.

    In one of the most powerful and thought-provoking novels of his remarkable career, Orson Scott Card interweaves a compelling portrait of Christopher Columbus with the story of a future scientist who believes she can alter human history from a tragedy of bloodshed and brutality to a world filled with hope and healing.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Thanks Uncle Orson

    • By Michael on 04-29-08

    Regular price: $25.17

    • The Case of the Case of Mistaken Identity

    • The Brixton Brothers, Book 1
    • By: Mac Barnett
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 2 hrs and 55 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 35
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 27
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 26

    It all starts here: The thrilling story of Steve Bixton's first case. Our hero has a national treasure to recover, a criminal mastermind to unmask, and a social studies report due Monday -- all while on the run from cops, thugs, and secret-agent librarians.

    • 3 out of 5 stars
    • creative storyline

    • By My4Kids on 10-15-17

    Regular price: $21.27

    • Mr. Spaceman

    • By: Robert Olen Butler
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson, Gabrielle de Cuir
    • Length: 6 hrs and 46 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      3.5 out of 5 stars 72
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 20
    • Story
      3.5 out of 5 stars 21

    Pulitzer Prize-winning author Robert Olen Butler tells a magical and humorous contemporary fable that captures the state of humanity at the cusp of a new millennium - as seen through the uniquely sensitive perspective of an empathetic extraterrestrial. An audible.com audio exclusive!

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Mr. Spaceman

    • By Jim on 10-06-05

    Regular price: $24.47

    • Gesundheit!

    • Bringing Good Health to You, the Medical System, and Society through Physician Service, Complementary Therapies, Humor, and Joy
    • By: Patch Adams M.D.
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 7 hrs and 13 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 31
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 18
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 19

    Meet Patch Adams, M.D., the revolutionary doctor who has challenged the foundations of modern medicine not only by making healthcare personal, but also by making it free. This extraordinary story was made into a major motion picture starring Robin Williams as Patch Adams.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • 20 year old book should be read by every student

    • By Anonymous User on 05-18-18
    • Bringing Good Health to You, the Medical System, and Society through Physician Service, Complementary Therapies, Humor, and Joy
    • By: Patch Adams M.D.
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 7 hrs and 13 mins
    • Release date: 06-12-00
    • 4 out of 5 stars 31 ratings

    Regular price: $17.47

    • More of the 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said

    • By: Ross Petras, Kathryn Petras
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson, Jayne Meadows, Bruce Vilanch, and others
    • Length: 1 hr and 2 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      3 out of 5 stars 11
    • Performance
      3.5 out of 5 stars 9
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars 9

    In More of the 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said, Ross and Kathryn Petras continue their connoisseur's compendium of awkward utterances, slips of the tongue, doubletalk, and just plain stupid statements from politicians, celebrities, sports figures, social leaders and average joes.

    • 2 out of 5 stars
    • Interesting but too much, too fast

    • By Brad P. on 05-09-10

    Regular price: $6.26

    • Different Kinds of Dead, and Other Tales

    • By: Ed Gorman
    • Narrated by: Rex Linn, Gabrielle de Cuir, Arte Johnson, and others
    • Length: 9 hrs and 21 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars 1
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    This collection of short stories displays Ed Gorman's talents as a masterful storyteller across a range of genres.

    A mysterious and beautiful girl who teaches arrogant young men about true love, a lonely traveling salesman who learns that his passenger is Death, children who can absorb the psychic pain of their parents, a desperately pursued serial killer who hides his face under gauze in a hospital room, and a woman who loves the alien infant nobody else wants - these stories and 10 others make up this collection by award-winning author Ed Gorman. Here are stories that led him to be called "one of the best" by Dean Koontz and "one of the most original writers in crime fiction today" by Kirkus Reviews. Here, you'll find the extraordinary range of storytelling skill and powerful emotions that won Gorman the prized International Fiction Award.

    Included in Different Kinds of Dead, and Other Tales are "Different Kinds of Dead", "Deathman", "A Girl Like You", "Loverboy", "Muse", "Riff", "The Brasher Girl", "Survival", "Masque", "Second Most Popular", and others.

    This collection reveals the extraordinary range of storytelling skill and powerful emotions that won Gorman the prized International Fiction Award. His protagonists, gritty and gruff, are strangely likable, and his writing, according to Mystery News, is "powerful, disturbing, [and] often poetic".

    Regular price: $24.47

    • The Greatest Mysteries of All Time, Volume 3

    • By: Robert Bloch, James Gould Cozzens, James Ellroy, and others
    • Narrated by: Richard Cox, Jamie Farr, Robert Forster, and others
    • Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
    • Original Recording
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 16
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 15
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 14

    Breathtaking suspense, cold-blooded crime and challenging twists of plot make this collection a chilling audio experience. Featuring the finest short-story mystery fiction by the most acclaimed writers, past and present, including: "The Perfect Crime" by Ben Ray Redman, "Quitters, Inc." by Stephen King, "High Darktown" by James Ellroy, "Yours Truly, Jack the Ripper" by Robert Bloch, "Clerical Error" by James Gould Cozzens, "The Gettysburg Bugle" by Ellery Queen, and more....

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Interesting, sometimes riveting, and fun!

    • By Gary on 12-18-17

    Regular price: $13.96

    • The Ghost Writer Secret

    • The Brixton Brothers, Book 2
    • By: Mac Barnett
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 3 hrs and 19 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars 18
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars 12
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 11

    When 12-year-old detective Steve Brixton gets a call that the Fairview diamond has gone missing, there are only two things to do: grab his new business cards and take the case! But Steve quickly learns there’s an even bigger mystery afoot. MacArthur Bart, a.k.a. Steve’s hero, a.k.a. the author of the Bailey Brothers Mysteries series, has been kidnapped! With the man who taught him everything he knows about sleuthing in trouble, Steve and his best chum, Dana, know they must stage a daring rescue....

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • AWESOMENESS

    • By I. Koch on 01-03-16

    Regular price: $18.20

    • Murder in America

    • A Coast to Coast Collection of Murder and Mayhem
    • By: Whitley Strieber, Mary Higgins Clark, William F. Nolan, and others
    • Narrated by: Arte Birney, David Johnson, Perry King, and others
    • Length: 5 hrs and 27 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Performance
      0 out of 5 stars 0
    • Story
      0 out of 5 stars 0

    A collection of coast-to-coast murder and mayham, including these unabridged short stories: "Vaudeville" by Whitley Strieber, read by Roddy McDowell; "Lucky Day" by Mary Higgins Clark, read by Betsy Palmer; "Starstruck" by Jon A. Breen, read by James Stacy; "Snookered" by Gerald Tomlinson, read by David Birney; "It Was Bad Enough" by Ron Goulart, read by Arte Johnson and Gee Whiz; "My Lovely" by Betty Buchanan, read by Joan Rivers. 

    Regular price: $17.49

    • Majipoor Chronicles

    • By: Robert Silverberg
    • Narrated by: J. Paul Boehmer, Cassandra Campbell, Emily Janice Card, and others
    • Length: 12 hrs and 31 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 147
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 114
    • Story
      4 out of 5 stars 113

    The young street urchin Hissune gets his due for helping Lord Valentine regain his throne. As a reward, he is sent into the depths of the Labyrinth, a massive library of memory cubes in which the entire history of Majipoor is preserved. As Hissune prepares for a summons to return to Castle Mount, he relives the lives of Majipoor's most famous and notorious inhabitants.

    • 3 out of 5 stars
    • SHE KNEW THEY HAD SEXES, BUT

    • By Jim "The Impatient" on 03-22-17

    Regular price: $23.07

    • Artificial Maturity

    • Helping Kids Meet the Challenge of Becoming Authentic Adults
    • By: Tim Elmore
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 7 hrs and 36 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4.5 out of 5 stars 40
    • Performance
      4.5 out of 5 stars 35
    • Story
      4.5 out of 5 stars 35

    Today's Generation iY (teens brought up with the Internet) and Homelanders (children born after 9/11) are overexposed to information at an earlier age than ever and paradoxically are underexposed to meaningful relationships and real-life experiences. Artificial Maturity addresses the problem of what to do when parents and teachers mistake children's superficial knowledge for real maturity. The audiobook is filled with practical steps that adults can take to furnish the experiences kids need to balance their abilities with authentic maturity.

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • So much to ponder

    • By ALove on 06-14-17

    Regular price: $19.95

    • Dave Barry Is Not Making This Up

    • By: Dave Barry
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson, Dave Barry - introduction
    • Length: 3 hrs and 14 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars 72
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars 46
    • Story
      4 out of 5 stars 46

    Yes, it's true: Pulitzer Prize-winning author Dave Barry's columns get out of the paper and sent around more than those of any other columnist in America. Join Dave as he runs for president, plays Claptonesque guitar in the world's most literary band (The Rock-Bottom Remainders), and gets the real scoop on all those UFO sightings. Warning: Dave Barry has a knack for giving his readers a few laughs and lots of expensive merchandise (ordered from the Home Shopping Club). No, we're not making this up!

    • 5 out of 5 stars
    • Dave Barry Makes Me Happy

    • By Sher from Provo on 11-17-11

    Regular price: $14.95

    • The Cat Who Killed Lilian Jackson Braun

    • A Parody
    • By: Robert Kaplow
    • Narrated by: Arte Johnson
    • Length: 4 hrs and 36 mins
    • Unabridged
    • Overall
      2 out of 5 stars 47
    • Performance
      2.5 out of 5 stars 31
    • Story
      2 out of 5 stars 33

    America's most beloved writer, Lilian Jackson Braun, author of twenty-four Cat Who... mysteries is now the subject of a mystery herself. In this spoof by one of her most ardent admirers, her beheaded body has been discovered in the men's room of a gay bar in Lower Manhattan. The police are baffled, and so it is up to Braun's eccentric writer friend, James Q. (Qafka), and his Siamese cats Ying-Ton and Poon-Tang to solve the ghastly mystery.

    • 1 out of 5 stars
    • What a disappointment!

    • By Fran Roberts on 06-26-09

    Regular price: $20.95

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