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It is June 21st, the longest day of the year, and new mother Camilla’s life is about to change forever. After months of maternity leave, she will drop her infant daughter off at daycare for the first time and return to her job as a literary agent. Finally. But, when she wakes, her husband Luke isn’t there, and in his place is a cryptic note. Then it starts. Breaking news: there's a hostage situation developing in London. The police arrive, and tell her Luke is involved. But he isn't a hostage. Her husband—doting father, eternal optimist—is the gunman.

As one of America's preeminent comedic voices, George Carlin saw it all throughout his extraordinary 50-year career and made fun of most of it. Last Words is the story of the man behind some of the most seminal comedy of the last half century, blending his signature acer-bic humor with never-before-told stories from his own life.

Emma Carpenter lives in isolation with her golden retriever Laika, house-sitting an old beachfront home on the rainy Washington coast. Her only human contact is her enigmatic old neighbor, Deek, and (via text) the house’s owner, Jules. One day, she reads a poorly written—but gruesome—horror novel by the author H. G. Kane, and posts a one-star review that drags her into an online argument with none other than the author himself. Soon after, disturbing incidents start to occur at night.

Yes, George Carlin is here with more of what he did better than any other comic: uproarious observations, laser-targeted crankiness, linguistic legerdemain, and inspired weirdness. ("If the shoe fits, get another just like it." "When you sneeze, all the numbers in your head go up by one.") Napalm & Silly Putty is just what his fans have been waiting for—another generous helping of notions, nonsense, assertions, assumptions, mockery, merriment, silliness, sarcasm, and, to be sure, plenty of disturbing references and toxic alienation.

Mark Lane tried the only US court case in which the jurors concluded that the CIA plotted the murder of President Kennedy, but there was always a missing piece: How did the CIA control cops and secret service agents on the ground in Dealey Plaza? How did federal authorities prevent the House Select Committee on Assassinations from discovering the truth about the complicity of the CIA? Now, Mark Lane tells all in this explosive new book.

Markus Novak just wants to come home. An investigator for a Florida-based death-row defense firm, Novak's life derailed when his wife, Lauren, was killed in the midst of a case the two were working together. Two years later her murderer is still at large, and Novak's attempts to learn the truth about her death through less-than-legal means and jailhouse bargaining have put his job on the line.

From the pulpit of the cross, Christ gave His final and most riveting sermon: His seven last words. In times past, Christ frequently spoke in parables, but no more. No, Christ penned these words with His royal blood like a calligrapher using the most delicate of strokes. Christʼs seven last words are the greatest utterances ever recorded in the history of the world—greater than the words of any esteemed orator, heroic leader, or even saint, because they were the last words of God to mankind.

Grammy Winner for Best Spoken Comedy Album
Performed by George Carlin himself, and filled with thoughts, musings, questions, lists, beliefs, curiosities, monologues, assertions, assumptions, and other verbal ordeals, Brain Droppings is infectiously funny.

New! Don't miss our AudibleComedy combo, featuring original humor from standups Greg Proops and Steve Marmel.

Natalka and Edwin are perfect if improbable partners in a detective agency. At eighty-four, Edwin regularly claims that he’s the oldest detective in England. He is a master at surveillance, deploying his age as a cloak of invisibility. Natalka, Ukrainian-born and more than fifty years his junior, is a math whizz, who takes any cases concerning fraud or deception. Despite a steady stream of minor cases, Natalka is frustrated. She loves a murder, as she’s fond of saying, and none have come the agency’s way. That is until local writer Melody Chambers dies.

Geralt the Witcher—revered and hated—holds the line against the monsters plaguing humanity in this collection of adventures, the first chapter in Andrzej Sapkowski’s groundbreaking epic fantasy series that inspired the hit Netflix show and the blockbuster video games.

Sal Terranova and Camden Templeton are cousins separated by upbringing, the Atlantic Ocean, and a common language. But fate, a run of bad luck, and a dead uncle have thrown them together, and together they must save the family bookstore from financial ruin, from its own insane employees, and probably from themselves. This is the story of what happens when The Sopranos meets Fawlty Towers...in a bookstore.

Special agent Mia Shields thinks she's seen it all. But nothing prepares her for the terror that descends upon the idyllic bayside community of St. Dennis, Maryland, where a depraved killer has left a grisly surprise for Chief of Police Gabriel Beck: the body of an unidentified woman, naked and completely encased in plastic wrap, stretched across the back seat of Beck's car. Hidden in the wrapping is a tape recording of the victim's last, gasping words. Soon the body count begins to rise as more victims are found, all gruesomely cocooned, their final pleas also captured on tape.

Drawing upon his experience as a former chief of staff on the Senate Finance Committee and as an Emmy-winning executive producer and writer of ‘The West Wing,’ Lawrence O’Donnell examines the compelling and impactful political stories of the day. Join him every weeknight.

For the past 30 years, Usher has exhilarated audiences with stadium-sized anthems, innovative choreography, and dazzling charm that has made him a once-in-a-generation superstar. The Last Showman is an introspective look into the past, present, and future of a beloved global R&B icon. Usher opens up about the inspirations, heartache, and growth that fueled the creation of his record-breaking magnum opus, Confessions, while revisiting some of its most iconic tracks.

A deathbed confession. A promise. Time is running out. As a volunteer at her local hospice, Nina spends much of her time comforting those whose time is running out. On his deathbed, her favorite resident, Bryan, confesses to accidentally killing someone in a hit-and-run when he was a teenager. Nina promises to go to his hometown to tell the victim's parents what happened to her all those years ago. Unruly daughter in tow, Nina travels to the small town of Harpersville and discovers there may be more to the story than Bryan let on. Will Nina be able to put things right before Bryan passes, ...

Opening in the settlement of Long Grass, Texas - not quite in Kansas, and nearly New Mexico - we encounter the taciturn Wyatt, whiling away his time in between bottles, and the dentist-turned-gunslinger Doc, more adept at poker than extracting teeth. Now hailed as heroes for their days of subduing drunks in Abilene and Dodge - more often with a mean look than a pistol - Wyatt and Doc are living out the last days of a way of life that is passing into history, two men never more aware of the growing distance between their lives and their legends.

Last Word is a full-length dark adult romance and psychological thriller with suspenseful themes. Any trigger warnings will be included in the foreword. Some situations may be uncomfortable for listeners. This is a reverse harem novel, meaning the main character has more than one love interest. This is the fourth and final book in the series.

Peter Wagner is a junior attending in orthopedic surgery at the Philadelphia General Hospital. During a late night trauma call he meets ex-con Russell Martino, a.k.a. – the Dashing Don, who discloses to Pete a rather peculiar bit of information. The tip triggers a re-evaluation of the case that imprisoned Martino, prompting the appearance of surly city Detective Hank Donovan. Dr. Wagner suddenly finds himself in an ethical bind, trapped between the confidentiality of a patient-physician relationship and an expanding investigation that embroils City Hall. To complicate matters, the ...

Olivia Limoges and the Bayside Book Writers are excited about Oyster Bay's newest resident: bestselling novelist Nick Plumley, who's come to work on his next book. But when Olivia stops by Plumley's rental she finds that he's been strangled to death. Her instincts tell her that something from the past came back to haunt him, but she never expects that the investigation could spell doom for one of her dearest friends....

If one George Carlin audio is funny, then two are funnier and three must be funniest, right? That's our thinking behind this new collection. t's a HighBridge library of laugh-out-loud, award-winning recordings featuring George himself performing many of his best bits.