Tu B’Av is often called the Jewish day of love. In this special Tu B’Av discussion, Rabbi Yisroel Bernath, known as the “Love Rabbi” shares ten essential Jewish relationship principles for singles, couples, and anyone seeking to build deeper, healthier love.

Drawing from Torah, Jewish wisdom, matchmaking experience, and years of counselling singles and couples, Rabbi Bernath explores why dating is not a performance, why chemistry must never outrun character, how to distinguish genuine needs from unrealistic checklists, and why love is not simply something we find, it is something we build.

This class offers practical guidance for dating with clarity, choosing with wisdom, communicating honestly, repairing conflict, and creating a relationship rooted in generosity, commitment, faith, and emotional responsibility.

10 Jewish Relationship Truths

1. Know Who You Are Before Asking Someone Else to Join You
2. Don’t Become Good at Dating, Become Good at Relating
3. Stop Auditioning for Love
4. Don’t Let Chemistry Outrun Character
5. Talk About What Matters Before the Wedding
6. Look for Your Complement, Not Your Clone
7. Know Your Essentials, but Don’t Worship Your Checklist
8. Love Grows Through Giving, but Giving Is Not Self-Erasure
9. Love Is Not Tit for Tat
10. Don’t Date the Relationship to Death

This episode dances around the age-old question, "What is Love?", the exploration begins with a universal quandary: the reason we question love's essence often stems from feelings of deficiency—either doubting the love from someone special or facing accusations of insufficient love ourselves. It suggests a poignant truth: we are most inclined to philosophize about love when its presence is questioned or feels lacking, much like no one questions the nature of a pastrami sandwich whilst enjoying one.

The narrative then divides the quest into two lanes: "Am I Loved?" and "Do I Love?", indicating that understanding love's impact on us can illuminate how we express love towards others. Love, as presented, is not an elusive sentiment detected by a mysterious heart's sensor but rather a series of tangible experiences perceived through our senses, validated by actions and expressions that signal to our brains and, consequently, to our hearts, the presence of love.

King Solomon's words in Proverbs "As water reflects a man’s face back to him, so is the heart of one man to another" is invoked to underscore that love, at its core, is a reflection, a reciprocal action that one can feel and recognize through the treatment they receive.

The episode emphasizes that love is fundamentally an action. It shifts the narrative from abstract conceptualization to practical expression, illustrating that love, akin to running or swimming, is defined by its enactment. The Hebrew word for love, "ahavah", rooted in the act of giving, encapsulates this ideology, positing that genuine love must manifest through tangible acts of kindness and care.

The discussion culminates with a divine perspective on love, referencing the commandment to love G-d, not as an emotional imposition but as a directive towards actionable love. This divine instruction echoes the broader theme: love is verified and validated through actions rather than mere feelings or declarations.

Takeaways:

1. Love as Reflection and Recognition: We seek the essence of love most acutely when its presence is in doubt. True love, however, is recognized through the actions and treatment we receive and give.
2. Love is Action, Not Just Emotion: The essence of love is captured not in abstract contemplation but in concrete actions and behaviors that convey care and affection.
3. The Divine Instruction on Love: The command to love God highlights the action-oriented nature of love, pushing us towards deeds of kindness as the true measure of love.

In essence, to question "What is Love?" is to embark on a journey from doubt to action, from introspection to expression, leading us to understand that the truest answer lies in how we act and respond to love in our lives. Love, therefore, is not just a state of being but a series of deliberate, loving actions that reflect our deepest commitments to others.

Join the "Love Rabbi" Yisroel Bernath as he sits down with Ilana and Jeremy Hamburgh, the dynamic duo behind My Best Social Life, for an inspiring and insightful conversation on building meaningful relationships for neurodiverse singles.

With over a decade of experience helping autistic and neurodivergent adults find community, friendship, and love, Jeremy Hamburgh has transformed lives through his innovative Social Life 360 program. Ilana Hamburgh, a former NYC special education teacher, now serves as the program’s Director of Education, using her passion for education to help clients unlock their social potential.

In this candid and heartfelt fireside chat, you’ll hear:

Jeremy and Ilana’s personal journey: From long-distance dating during COVID to their shared mission of making social connection accessible for everyone.

Practical insights: How neurodiverse individuals can find love and friendship, build social skills, and foster a sense of belonging.

Their philosophy: Why neurodivergent brains are not a limitation, but a strength in relationships and community-building.

Inspiration and hope: Real-life stories of transformation and actionable ways to create a more inclusive world.

Whether you’re neurodivergent, a friend or family member, or someone interested in creating more inclusive spaces, this event will leave you inspired and equipped to support neurodiverse individuals in their journey toward love and friendship.

About Jeremy and Ilana Hamburgh

Jeremy and Ilana Hamburgh are friendship and dating coaches who teach the strategies and skills that empower autistic and neurodivergent adults to find community, make friends, start dating, and build relationships. Ilana has over 16 years of experience as a special education teacher in New York City and Jeremy has over 14 years of experience as a social coach for autistic and neurodivergent adults. Their passion is their cutting-edge strategy and skills program, called Social Life 360, which teaches their clients how to confidently meet new people, and bring them into their life. What makes the Social Life 360 program so innovative is that Jeremy and Ilana decode the social and dating world for their clients using formulas, diagrams, checklists, and step-by-step processes that are more intuitive for people with neurodivergent minds. The Social Life 360 program also provides clients with a warm, inclusive, and vibrant online community that makes them feel embraced on their social journey from the moment they begin.

You can schedule a no cost Family Strategy Session at https://mybestsociallife.com/apply.

You can schedule a no cost Strategy Session at https://mybestsociallife.com/freesession.

About Rabbi Yisroel Bernath

Cherished for his incredible warmth, non-judgmental personality, and witty charm, Rabbi Yisroel Bernath is anything but your typical rabbi. A dynamic leader in the Jewish world, Rabbi Bernath blends traditional wisdom with modern insights to inspire, uplift, and connect people from all walks of life.

Rabbi Bernath has been instrumental in creating hundreds of happy matches and is passionately devoted to helping singles find clarity, hope, and lasting love. With his keen understanding of the challenges of modern dating, he’s successfully guided hundreds of singles through the “singles wall,” making him a trusted coach and mentor for those navigating relationships.

Find out more about his journey and work at http://www.theloverabbi.com.

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Access Rabbi Bernath's Articles on Relationships https://medium.com/@loverabbi

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