It takes courage to make a relationship work. The courage to admit you’re wrong. The courage to persist when you’re right. The courage to take chances in communication, generosity and vulnerability. And most of all, the courage to objectively look at what’s happening emotionally inside of you. This episode explores projection and projective identification, two psychological processes that can make or break a relationship. It also suggests way to handle them when they're happening and to prevent them from happening in the first place.

Ever felt like something was “just not right” even when nothing is wrong? Psychologists call these Not Just Right Experiences (NJREs)—a subtle but powerful force behind OCD and OCPD. Learn what they are, why they matter, and how to manage them before they hijack your peace of mind.

We’ve got perfectionism all wrong. The real problem isn’t high standards—it’s the illusion of perfectibility and harsh judgment that have been grafted onto it. Perfectionism began as a guide toward purpose, but centuries of distortion turned it into an enforcer of impossible ideals. Instead of banishing perfectionism, we can reclaim its adaptive side—commitment, persistence, and pursuit of excellence—while stripping away conceit and control. By befriending perfectionism, acknowledging its shadow, and clarifying our purpose, we transform it from a tyrant into a trusted partner. This episode brings together science and Jungian psychology for an unconventional approach to dealing with perfectionism.

Explore practical insights and nuanced strategies for working with clients who have obsessive-compulsive personality traits. Drawing on 33 years of experience, this post addresses common challenges, misconceptions, and ways to foster meaningful change—while offering a behind-the-scenes look for those in therapy.

This is an extended interview in which endurance athlete, coach, and podcaster Travis Macy asks me about the driven personality and broader questions of well-being. Having set records in some truly astounding endurance races, Travis knows about perseverance, resilience and fortitude, all of which exist as potential in the obsessive-compulsive personality. We compare notes about competition, athletics, optimizing our energy, dealing with tension, and approaching our goals in a healthy way. We touch on developing a better relationship with the body, how mindfulness meditation actually helps, and how Chronic Urgency Stress Syndrome (CUSS) will drive us crazy if we don't hold what's most important foremost in our minds.

This essay explores how perfectionist and obsessive-compulsive personalities construct “fortresses” to avoid humiliation, embarrassment, and shame. Through vivid stories and cultural examples—from Steve Jobs to Michael Jackson—it identifies four compulsive types (Boss, Workaholic, People-Pleaser, and Obsessor) and shows how their strategies both protect and imprison them.

Carl Jung famously wrote that the gods have become diseases. What he meant was that because we no longer consciously acknowledge the powerful forces we used to call gods and goddesses, they’ve gone underground and manifest in our physical and mental ailments. However unbelievable they might seem, they are still forces to be reckoned with. Such is certainly the case with Ananke, the Goddess of fate, compulsion and inevitability. People with a need to control can learn a great deal from her.

Explore how compulsive perfectionism creates alienation, and the science-backed benefits of as sense of connection to something larger than yourself. And discover practical ways to restore a sense of connection with Nature and the Universe for greater peace and well-being.