Part 2 - Topic Timestamps

(00:00) Lost sense of self after breakup

(02:44) Losing oneself when in a relationship

(07:20) Unlearn the past memories and feeling of intimacy

(10:59) General ways to cope with post-breakup

(16:44) How to battle lost sense of self? reframe, rediscovering oneself

(18:25) Stop wanting to grow after being in a relationship

(20:26) Kean’s story in seeking replacement for physical intimacy

(26:05) Reflecting & learning from past relationship

(29:57) How to cope with feeling stagnant after being in relationship?

(32:28) How many months started to shop having intrusive thoughts and memories

(34:09) Reaching the 6th stage of grief?

(38:55) What breakup ultimately means, how to love again?

(41:13) Outro

Why does a breakup hurt so much? How long does it take to get over it? What to do if I keep being reminded of our past memories? These were the questions I often asked myself when going through the breakup. It was devastating; the feeling of loneliness and the psychological struggles are difficult for someone to empathise with if they have never been through one. 

Sometimes, a place, a photo, a screenshot of chat history or an item can also bring me back to the depressive state, the feeling of void & loss. In today’s episode, I invited my close friend, Leon, to explore the burns from a romantic breakup. We discussed our emotions after the breakup, what we did to cope and heal, and where we are now after a year.

Topic Timestamps

(00:29) Intro + background

(02:18) Kean’s breakup story

(06:48) How Kean respond to the breakup

(10:10) Kean’s emotions right after the breakup

(10:58) Why does breakup hurt so much?

(11:39) The struggles right after the breakup

(13:02) Confronting the pain voluntarily 

(14:03) Trying to bargain and clarify why it ended

(19.22) How to have a proper closure?

(26.08) Flashbacks & letting go of past shared memories psychologically

(29:25) Leon’s breakup story

(35:20) How Leon respond to the breakup

(36:20) Feeling worthless, depressed, and lonely

(38:03) Feeling bad asking for emotional support

(40:59) Feeling worthless and start downloading dating apps

(41:52) Post-breakup as dumper vs dumpee

Check out E1P2 for the remaining conversation. If you want to reach out to me, you can search @keanyoudoit on Instagram. 

This is an introduction into the philosophy of healing burns. It includes why am I doing this podcast and what kind of values I hope to share to you through this podcast.