When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us

Letting Go of Their Problems, Loving Them Anyway, and Getting on with Our Lives

By: Jane Adams

Narrated by: Jane Adams

How do today's parents cope when the dreams we had for our children clash with reality? What can we do for our 20- and even 30-somethings who can't seem to grow up? Who can we turn to when the kids aren't all right and we, their parents, are frightened, frustrated, resentful, embarrassed, and especially, disappointed? In this groundbreaking book, a social psychologist who's been chronicling the lives of American families for over two decades confronts our deepest concerns when our grown kids have failed to thrive. She listens to a generation that "did everything right" and expected its children to grow into happy, healthy, successful adults. But they haven't, at least not yet - and meanwhile, we're letting their problems threaten our health, marriages, security, freedom, careers, retirement, and other family relationships.

With warmth, empathy, and perspective, Dr. Adams offers a positive, life-affirming message to parents who are still trying to "fix" their adult children - Stop! She shows us how to separate from their problems without separating from them, and how to be a positive force in their lives while getting on with our own.

©2003 Jane Adams (P)2016 Tantor

Spot On!

I have been struggling to move on from my adult son for almost a decade and this book reinforced the decisions I am making are positive and I can finally move forward without the guilt.

The advise in this book has been monumental for me to hear and know that my story isnt unique, its a text book story for the parents of addicts and we have tomlet go and move on.

great book.

helpful

I listened to it all the way through...will listen again...I took in some keynotes...I realized I stopped my daughter now 51 from growing up...always bailing her out...not anymore...I'm done hurting...my other two son's I've called it quits with them...no more abuse..what hurts is not seeing my granddaughters...

Great book

Listened to it 3 times. Need more details on detachment though. How to do that.

Stating the obvious

Many of us are desperate for help. I hoped I’d find hidden tricks. This book is great for parents who have not done much prior research.

The substance lies on the last 3 chapters

Too many experiences overwhelmed me. However the last 3 chapters were inspiring enough to catch my full attention.