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The Man's Guide to Women

Scientifically Proven Secrets from the "Love Lab" About What Women Really Want 
Narrated by: Eric Michael Summerer
Length: 5 hrs and 28 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (830 ratings)

Regular price: $19.95

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Publisher's Summary

A great "philosopher" once said, "Trying to understand women is like trying to smell the color nine." But the fact is, men can understand women to their great benefit. All they need is the right teacher. And, arguably, there is no better teacher than John Gottman, PhD, a world-renowned relationships researcher and author of the best-selling 7 Principles of Making Marriage Work.

His new book, written with wife Julie Gottman, a clinical psychologist; Doug Abrams; and Rachel Carlton Abrams, MD, is based on 40 years of scientific study, much of it gleaned from the Gottmans' popular couples' workshops and the "love lab" at the University of Washington. It's written primarily for men because new research suggests that it is the man in a relationship who wields the most influence to make it great or screw it up beyond repair.

The Man's Guide to Women offers the science-based answers to the question: What do women really want in men? The book explains the hallmarks of manhood that most women find attractive and helps men hone those skills to be the men women desire.

©2016 John Gottman, PhD, Julie Schwartz Gottman, PhD, Douglas Abrams, and Rachel Carlton Abrams, MD (P)2015 Audible, Inc.

What members say

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Great advice from the Love Lab again

If you want to develop your communication methods and create a stronger relationship, then this is an excellent choice. The term Zero and Hero are used often, and I like to think you might as well sum it up as how not to be an asshat. I was raised mostly by women and thought I had a decent grasp. This book tied together a lot of parts and pieces of the right things and behaviors floating about in my brain.

Even if you're in a good relationship you can still gain from the insights held within.

11 of 11 people found this review helpful

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Invaluable

Gottman is on his game with this one. It's not about what men do wrong, or about being ashamed of shortcomings- it's about reconciling differences and learning to be together. If you want a healthy relationship, if you want to know how healthy women operate, listen to this book for a guideline.

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

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Perhaps the best relationship book

I have recently gone through a breakup and have taken it upon myself to read as many relationship books as possible. This book provides actionable advice and many golden nuggets. Also recommend reading the book "Attached" with it

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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We Want to Be Heroes For Our Wives

This book was a-mazing! As men, we are expected to know how to love women correctly for life but that is impossible,in my opinion, without some serious help. How can we understand women when they are so different? I think many men learn trial by fire and by failing and not understanding why or what went wrong. This book allows us to be heroes by studying up, reading up versus giving up and has practical steps to make us more empowered in relationships. Who really wants to fail in love?

This book will help men (us) to get it right or as close to right as possible. I will recommend this guide to every male friend, relative, mentee and even future sons-in-law so they have a proven guide to make their wives happy. Thank you Gottmans and Abrams!

7 of 8 people found this review helpful

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Is there a "woman's guide to men"?

I thought the book was incredibly insightful but after listening to it I feel waited down with an overwhelming job that can never be met. I've made uneducated attempts to accomplish these things with two prior marriages but feel that just like this book describes all time, services, resources go from men to women I would like to hear if there's some sort of balance. It also seemed to me that the more I tried to provide these suggested tasks the higher the requirement became until there was nothing left of me except a spineless man surveying an endlessly demanding woman until I needed to escape to have any vestige of a life of my own where I had some control of my time, my resources, and my own goals.

14 of 18 people found this review helpful

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Totally relevant information

I felt like this book was written for me. Every chapter has value. Be sure to bookmark!

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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Very basic info on how not to be an a-hole.

Could be helpful for the most obtuse clueless lot but not for the average good guy.

10 of 13 people found this review helpful

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should be mandatory

if you love a woman, get this book. ATTUNE works immediately. there are some assumptions steeped in traditional role definitions at the end, toward the sexuality section. these may or may not apply to your relationship. either way, the content and the concept are worth a listen.

4 of 5 people found this review helpful

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Not for Veterans

This book has great advice, but seems to be written with an audience in mind of those in the initial stages o my a relationship. I have been married for 7 years, though this was helpful, it was not intended for me.

6 of 8 people found this review helpful

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A book for women not so much for men.

What would have made The Man's Guide to Women better?

Instead of just focusing on explaining the woman which apparently can and can't be explained because sometimes alle women are the same and some times all women are completely different.

Would you ever listen to anything by the authors again?

Possibly.

What three words best describe Eric Michael Summerer’s performance?

He did a good job of sounding condescending to men

What reaction did this book spark in you? Anger, sadness, disappointment?

Annoyance at being spoken down too most of the time. I found my self say yes, but stop talking to me like I am some sort of Neanderthal

Any additional comments?

This is a book for a self congratulating woman who like to be spoken of in the third person. I regret buying this book I got very little value out of it. The beginning was good I didn't mind what I thought was sarcasm, but as it continued on it got weary. After the way, way to short part about crazy women the book just went all in on women are wonderful no matter what. It did not make me understand women better. Rather it was a bucket list of behavior I should and should not do.

18 of 26 people found this review helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 07-27-16

A good investment...

Except for perhaps one or two tips, and that it's worded like all the change or responsibility is for the man, this book is probably the best I've read (heard - thanks audible) and has many lessons. I'm sure I'll play it through a few times.

6 of 6 people found this review helpful

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  • Ras
  • 02-12-18

brilliantly clear and informative

This book is written by academics but it is written in an entertaining non-academic manner. However, it is still highly informative and dependable on scientific knowledge based on evolutionary theory. Its coverage is great and it reads very well. I would definitely recommended this book to any man who wants to increase his understanding of women in a solid, reliable way.

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  • Rav pal
  • 07-10-17

incorrect information

The 'advice' given here is incorrect to my experience. Trying to hard be politically correct, probably written by someone who doesnt get sex.

1 of 4 people found this review helpful

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  • mark sugden
  • 02-07-18

quite brilliant

this is what I needed 40 years ago thank god I've got it now great book

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Tim
  • 06-19-16

recommend

Good insight with no egotistical undertone like other books I've read. I would recommed to both qlued up and clueless men. There is both priceless nuggets of information and reassurance of what you'll already know

2 of 3 people found this review helpful