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The Gap and the Gain
- The High Achievers' Guide to Happiness, Confidence, and Success
- Narrated by: Dr. Benjamin Hardy
- Length: 5 hrs and 58 mins
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Publisher's summary
As he did in Who Not How, Dr. Benjamin Hardy shares one of Dan Sullivan's simple yet profound teachings that until now has been known only to his Strategic Coach clients: unsuccessful people focus on "The Gap", but successful people focus on "The Gain".
"[T]his one simple concept is a masterclass on positive psychology, healthy relationships, mental well-being, and high-performance. Everything that psychologists know about how to create a high-functioning and successful person can be achieved using The GAP and the GAIN." (Dr. Benjamin Hardy)
Most people, especially highly ambitious people, are unhappy because of how they measure their progress. We all have an "ideal", a moving target that is always out of reach. When we measure ourselves against that ideal, we're in "the gap". However, when we measure ourselves against our previous selves, we're in "the gain".
That is where the gap and the gain concept comes in. It was developed by legendary entrepreneur coach Dan Sullivan and is based on his work with tens of thousands of successful entrepreneurs. When Dan's coaching clients periodically take stock of all that they've accomplished - both personally and professionally - they are often shocked at how much they have actually achieved. They weren't able to appreciate their progress because no matter how much they were getting done, they were usually measuring themselves against their ideals or goals.
In this book you will learn that measuring your current self vs. your former self has enormous psychological benefits. And that's really the key to this deceptively simple yet multilayered concept that will have you feeling good, feeling grateful, and feeling like you are making progress even when times are tough, which will in turn will bolster motivation, confidence, and future success.
If you're finding that happiness eludes you no matter how much you've achieved, then learning this easy mindset shift will set you on a life-changing path to greater fulfillment and success.
This audio product contains a PDF with supporting material, and the PDF is available to download
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Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Jake Adams
- 07-27-22
Are these reviewers serious?
This self help book is mediocre at best. It's highly subjective, speculative, and very opinion based. Every example is of people who have already reached the highest tier of their profession... And the overall theme of this book is to feel ok with falling short of your goals. It really felt like a knock off of other books and basic principles of psychology and sociology, but with a new catch phrase. I really am very surprised it's gotten such good reviews. Trevor Lawrence doesn't skip meals bc he can't afford to eat. And he works harder than anyone else that hasn't achieved his level of excellence.. He also has other traits that give him an advantage at what he does... How do so many people miss these obvious "gaps" in logic... I/E one on hand it says you need to set firm goals and strive to achieve them. And then on the other, they guilt trip, and virtue signal you into not giving an actual assessment of your performance in order to not bring other people around you down.. Next a lot of people have the same goals. If one person achieves more toward that same goal.. This book tells the other person to lower their expectations/goals in order to be happy instead of motivating them to find the means to achieve the goal.. Some many of the "points" the older one makes are really not factual.. Did I listen to the same book as everyone else?
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15 people found this helpful
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- Dana Adams
- 10-22-21
One of the Most Helpful Mind Shifts a Perfectionist Can Make
I’ve been following the author’s work for several years now and each book gets better and better. The Gap and the Gain is a novel concept for measuring progress and success. It’s presented in a clear and concise manner. He offers loads of examples, personal stories, and other people’s stories as a means of driving the point home. The book includes casual recorded conversations between Ben and Dan which I found to be a bonus! Ben lays out the reasons why we should live in the Gain and Dan really drives it home. It’s a wonderful collaboration between two people who invest all their time in building up others. It celebrates the life work of one exceptional leader and beautifully demonstrates what’s possible when an emerging thought leader acts courageously. Thank you for sharing this powerful tool with us!
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11 people found this helpful
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- JB
- 11-08-21
Hands down, best book I have read this year
I read a lot of books and this is the best book I have read this year, possibly in the last 5 years. As a highly driven entrepreneur, this book is already helping me in business, but also in my marriage, being a dad and in my church. Thank you Ben and Dan!
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7 people found this helpful
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- Jesse
- 11-07-21
Life changing. No seriously life changing!
Wow! This has transformed me. I'm so grateful for this book. I actually teared up in the conclusion when I realized the consequences of my wrong thinking. As soon as I finished this book, I sent an apology text to my wife and business coach. I'm excited to share our new thinking with my employees. This is going to be great!
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7 people found this helpful
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- Reyden E.
- 11-03-21
Great book!
Benjamin Hardy and Dan Sullivan delivered again! This books talks about so many great ways to reframe our belief systems to see the GAINS in our lives versus the GAPS.
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5 people found this helpful
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- Laura
- 10-23-22
Sadly Disappointed
I hoped Dr. Hardy would have brought more depth to this book. This book is for a very specific audience. There are some good general concepts. But it's oversimplified and amplifying the voice of a boomer with privilege and toxic positivity. This book writren by a PhD should have brought the complexity of existence given what we know about neurobiology in the current day. Dan Sullivan is the epitome of toxic positivity. It is the antithesis of empathy. He can get away with it. It serves him and his wealthy clients. But bummer for a PhD. Dr. Hardy, Careful with the Kool-Aid. We are not measuring the negative impact of your superficial explanations that will have positive impact for some and negative for others. I live in the gain AND I am frustrated by this book.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Eli
- 11-02-21
Incredible and mind blowing. True insights and activities to change your future
The key simple concepts and activities that Ben and Dan discuss in this audiobook and their interviews in between the chapters are so incredible and uplifting to have hope again in my future and what I’m pursuing. It also gives me a toolset and conversation booster for those around me to win and to be in the gap. I’m so excited to experience daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly gaps as well as sharing these experiences with my wife, kids, and family. Thank you Ben and Dan for putting this book together and excited to see what other books you guys create together to make our world and the way we see it better!
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4 people found this helpful
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- Michael.r.smith
- 01-05-23
Addict
I agree strongly with some of the philosophies in this book and disagree with others as strongly , is a great tool if you are suffering from addiction depression or some thing that you feel is holding you back But most successful people are already living by these principles.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Tamas
- 10-05-22
One thought explained repetitively
This a self help book you can skip. We heard this idea million times, turn your hardships into a learning experience bla bla bla… nothing further.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Devon Brown
- 11-30-21
Going to listen to it twice
Overall. Great book that teaches a very powerful concept. I wasn't too big of a fan of the conversations at the end of each chapter between the two gentlemen. I didn't think those conversations were quite as direct or succinct as the chapters themselves. But overall, this was an awesome book and I'm actually going to listen to it a second time to pick up more pearls of wisdom. if you are on the fence about reading this book, I 100% percent think you should
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3 people found this helpful
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- Fernando
- 07-16-22
Great concept!
Loved the idea shared to measure success. It's well explained and easy to follow. There are some conversations between the authors that make the audiobook engaging
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1 person found this helpful
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- Gareth
- 11-18-21
One of the two most powerful positive psychology tools I have ever used
Thanks Dan for creating the concept that has changed my outlook for the better. Thank you Ben for bringing Dan’s creation into the light and to my attention. Brilliant and so simple to implement in every day life.
I particularly enjoyed the two-way interview sections with Dan at the end of each chapter and hearing the authors’ voices - there is real heart and soul in what you guys do.
For anyone considering reading/listening - particularly high achievers and entrepreneurs - this book will enhance your life more than money and all the riches you can imagine! Just buy it. This book will help you to fix that strange program in your brain that makes you always discount your own impressive achievements.
You might be wondering what the other most powerful psychological tool I have used is…. Well look me up to find out ;)
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- Ravi Shukle
- 10-03-23
Save yourself hours of time! avoid this book
the concept could honestly be summarised in 1 page or 5mins of audio. Now I'm sure Dan Sullivan has some other good books but he is very out of touch with the modern world of digital or social media and it shows. there are borrowed concepts here throughout.
one thing I will say is that the concept can help those don't look at the positives frame it a little better but other than that nothing new pr ground breaking.
you can summarise this book in one sentence: don't go through it grow through it. learn from all past actions. The rest of the book is just content filler.
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- MR D Shukla
- 09-15-23
Great book
I love this concept of the gap again and it's given me a process to frame how I start and finish my days and we'll continue slowly reading and making my way through every single one of these two men's books great stuff
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- Samuel
- 08-22-23
The Process Mapped
I find it deeply interesting that much of what is written in this book is a clear and concise outline of what me and many people I know have been doing for years- however, without knowing exactly what it was called.
This book will assist you to understand how to improve your life speedily, by developing yourself regardless of the external factors. Whilst reading this book, I was reminded of the profound impact the late Jim Rohn had on my life and how grateful I am for resources like this that can weave high-level coaching, psychology and real life together effortlessly.
Thank you Dr. Benjamin Hardy and Dan Sullivan.
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- Adam
- 07-18-23
Simple but really Great book
Simple but really Great book, very easy to apply this in your life and work
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- Ami porter
- 04-02-23
Really enjoyed
Amazing, well recorded and throughly enjoyed it. Would recommend to anyone that likes journaling and goal setting
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- Daniela Tilbrook
- 02-26-23
Life changing book
All these years I have been chasing goals, achievements. Always looking forward. This book is a game changer. Love it so much am going to now re listen. Thank you
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- AD1983
- 02-06-23
Everyone should listen or read this book
This has completely shifted the way I see my life. It’s so simple, but yet so powerful. Everyone should have this knowledge and put it into practice daily.
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- Ivan A.
- 01-22-23
Great philosophy. thanks!
I really liked and enjoyed it overall. I just find conversations a little too long but I got great tips to put in practice everyday.
I'd like a little pause between the exercises and the book continuation so I know when to pause the audio.
I loved and noted how much Benjamin worked on this audiobook, thanks for sharing your knowledge!
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- Anonymous User
- 01-20-22
Want to be happy?
We can choose to measure ourselves against fluctuating ideals and externals or choose a life of GAIN. The more GAINS you create the more specific and selective you will become about the life you will live and the future you will create. Absolute GOLD.
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- Anonymous User
- 11-23-23
A Must for your Mindset
This book is a must read for those seeking to improve their mindset.
A simple concept with such far reaching benefits that help you get your head in the right space to face all that life throws at you.
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- Anonymous User
- 10-15-23
Excellent book
This is a great book for challenging how you see things that have happened, are happening and might happen in the future. Look for the gains everyday.
Measure backwards.
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- Anonymous User
- 07-30-23
Brilliantly explained what you are looking for
If you want to grow to next level in your future this will help you like for mine !
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- Anonymous User
- 06-14-23
Informative
Liked the conversation pieces at the end of each chapter. The book has prompted a change of habit.
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- leanne
- 04-12-23
This is a gem!
Dr Benjamin and Dan just open a world that take my growth journey to another level! I already notice I am operating on another level by just catching myself when I’m in the Gap and practice measuring backward! Thank you Dan and Dr Benjamin for sharing this gem!
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- Eddies New Friend
- 02-14-23
Simple life lessons that are easy to follow!
The wheel is not being reinvented here! It’s solid advice to help you re-wire they way you think about the things that happen and have happened. Great read (listen)
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- Anonymous User
- 02-01-23
Bite size morsels of astonishing insight - thanks Dan
As above! No more no less!
Extreme eternal gratitude to Dan and Dr Benjamin Hardy and Tony Ireland (AUS) who introduced us to your concepts.
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- giulio
- 01-19-23
Great book
Another great book from Dr. Hardy , Really recommended for young professional in search of balace
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- Malee
- 01-17-23
Boom
If anyone’s into performance- this is the best book I’ve ever read in terms of bang for buck and the closest thing to a motivation pill. Easy to digest and implement- for self, kids, teams, family- at work, play or rest… Helps to hit each day running and create happier habits.
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