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Publisher's Summary

Winner of the 2018 ABR Listeners Choice Award for best in humor!

A collection of absurdist and thought-provoking stories from the author's Return to the Dirt, Just Speculating, and more, including unreleased, exclusive, audio-only content! Performed by a cast of award-winning and Audie® nominated narrators. Fans of the macabre, dark humor, and cerebral
thrillers are guaranteed a good listen. 

Occupational Hazards is an unflinching ride through the absurdity of it all. Existentialism, absurdism, and outlandish humor merge with ordinary, workaday life for a truly unique perspective of the human experience. Not recommended for the faint of heart or easily offended. But if meaty stories are what you're after....

We hope you're hungry.  

©2017 Geoff Sturtevant (P)2017 Geoff Sturtevant

Critic Reviews

"There is something fresh and crazy here, and that is difficult to find." (audiobookreviewer.com)                              

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

My Bologna has a first name . . .

Whoa, baby. This is one impressive book. It is a collection of some AMAZING stories that run the gamut of comical to horrifying in their own right. Geoff Sturtevant has really mastered the art of the short story, he keeps them long enought to make them interesting, make a point, and then moves on. He doesn't drag the tale down with fluff and filler, and I firmly believe that he chose each word with extreme and deliberate care.

I saw that this book had won some audio awards, and can very easily see why. I really could not find a bad tale in the bunch; is it wrong of me to say that I did wait for one to pop up? Usually every collection has one or two "nice effort" awards, or end up as epic fails, but not here. Ok, I shall amend that thought. While the story itself is really good, the narration on The Relativist was a bit of a letdown; which is surprising since I am a huge fan of Mr. Sleep. His voice acting in Critical Failures is a real standout, but here it is a drag on the wonderful story Geoff has crafted. In this case, I stand by the belief that you should try to play the part as it is written, and if you can't then move aside. I just did a review where all the characters were Russian, but none had a Russian accent, and it pulled the story down. Here, the main players are Asian, and Sleep makes no effort to portray that. I don't know if he was afraid to come across as being racist; in today's climate I can understand that, but it needed acknowledged.

Without question, the Jar Baby was my favorite tale. I am a laugher, and I'll be dipped in sticks if this stroy didn't have me busting a gut and popping buttons on my shirt from laughing so much. I must also commend, Sturtevant, for sneaking in a story that he narrates all by his lonesome. He does a fantastic job, and you remember how I said he makes his point and gets out? Well, this story of his, Anchors Away, could have go on a while longer in my eyes. Always leave 'em wanting more. He does. The other narrators are all fantastic in their repsective roles, with McSorely carrying the load with three stories under his belt. This is a book you will want to go back and listen to over and over again.

I really dig G.S.'s writing style, delivery, and perspective. I can feel a little Twain attitude floating around in his words, and think that given time he is really going to be a highly regarded writer. I would love to see a nice full length tale from him in the future, but considering the punch that his shorts pack (does that come across wrong?) I don't know if I could handle a full length book blast from him!!! I'll sure as hell try to though!!!!! You should, too. Get this and enjoy some incredible writing. Even though I did receive a promo code for this review it in no way influenced my considerations of the material, and in fact, inspired me to be more honest. Getting a code generally makes me harsher as a reviewer as I am more often concerned what someone like Me will decide based on my review.

If this review helped, please press the YES below. Thank you immensely!!!

7 of 7 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

WELL I'LL BE DIPPED

It is honestly hard to put into words how much I enjoyed this collection. Geoff Sturtevant had me laughing out loud in the *introduction* to this collection. I hadn't even started the actual book before I was actually belly laughing. Many books tout being funny and, in my experience, very few of them actually are. Amusing? Sure. But actually funny? Not at all.

'Occupational Hazards: The Blue-Collar Omnibus' is a collection of stories that range from bizarre to hilarious to horrific. There was something to love in each and every one of them. Sturtevant delivers a fresh and compelling story in each short piece; he grabbed me right from the top and didn't let me go. My favorite one might be the very first, and "Well, I'll be dipped!" now comes out of my face regularly. These unique tales are all winners and I couldn't recommend this collection any more highly. All of the narrators successfully brought the story they were telling to life. 10/10 If you haven't read this collection yet, you're missing out on literally all of the fun.

I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Manic set of insane stories

This is an interesting mix of stories that are all over the map. It reminds me of Tales From the Crypt and the like. It is well written and the author got top shelf narration for the book. The stories... Well, they range from the amusing to the completely insane. Let's just say that at times I assumed that the author harkens from a state with legal marijuana. The book is a good departure from well, everything. It is different enough that you can read the stories between other books to reset your own expectations.

I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Cute funny and over the top fun listen

Any additional comments?

5 Stars (a mix of 4 and 5 Stars rounding up)

Jar Baby -John McLain (Narrator)
I laughed myself silly from baby in the jar to the, redneck hillbilly and his ways just too dang funny. “I’ll be dipped in S*** “ has become my favorite new saying. I thought I would die laughing at how he talked about his wife, the TV and new laptop. His wife is something else as they bring you laugh after laugh I bet you won’t be able to stop listening. The ending is to die for just too funny. The narrator did an outstanding job, loved his character voices he really had the characters down to a T. I plan to listen to this one again.


The Relativist - Jonathan Sleep (Narrator)
I didn’t care for this one it is about Chinese people and how they cook, what their secrets are. The narrator never did sound Chinese which really took away from the story. The narrator wasn’t bad his character voice just didn’t fit this story.


Anything For My Bubela - Steven Jay Cohen (Narrator)
A man owes a lot of money and mother is beside herself. Just how could her dear son do this to her? Funny, cute as the author spins a delightful tale of mother, son and the wrong people to owe money to. I laughed so much through this. Dear sweet mama is something else and so very surprising.The narration was wonderful I loved his character voices they really fit the character and pull you in. I had no trouble picturing each scene as it unfolded. The narrator really puts a lot of emotion into this audio. I just loved it and plan to listen to this one again.


The Organization - Paul J. McSorley (Narrator)
This is about an old folks home and what happens to them as a delivery man looks on in horror. It’s full of surprises you won’t see coming. A great twist that is shocking but at times funny once you get over the horror of it. The narration was great, wonderful male and female voices that fit each character. The emotion for each character was outstanding.


Anchors Away – Geoff Sturtevant (Author, Narrator)
This is not listened on the title page but it is a short story about a sailor, his voyage and letting his so call anchor fly. That is about all I can say about it without giving it away. The author is also the narrator in this story. He does a wonderful job of narration from his character voices to his sound effects they are outstanding. I do wish it has been a little longer about the time you get into the story it is over. A fun listen that holds your attention.


The Technicians - Ramon de Ocampo (Narrator)
There is a lesson in this DO NOT put off tomorrow what you can and should have done today you never know when it might be too late. These men get very high pay for doing their job but if you mess up as one did you might be done. The story is based around two techs that do their job with pride, as you will come to see the jobs they do aren’t something most of us would like to do or enjoy doing. I saw the ending coming just as it unfolds and my heart went out to one of these men. The narration was great, the characters voices were great. I loved the accent, and the emotions given to each character. I could hear the emotion in their voice when a job goes bad or even went good.


Night Fright - Ramon de Ocampo (Narrator)
I sure didn’t see that coming. When fantasy meets reality you just have to go with the flow and do what comes natural. New neighbor moves in all the ladies want to meet up with him that is all but one which is the kid next door that lets his mind go wild. With the man’s night light the kid is looking at it closely maybe a little too close. It really does become a frightful night. The narration is good, the character voices are good and the author and narrator really pulls you in.


My Best customer - Paul J. McSorley (Narrator)
I will never look at delivery man the same again, well I never looked at them this way. Ok there are some very cute ones out there. Some are true hunks but I would never think about taking it to this level. This is so wrong in so many ways. The lesson between these pages is be careful, be very careful what you say you just might think you are saying something wonderful when in fact you just might have said something you will spend the rest of your life wishing you had not. I really liked this story but it is a little out there. I doubt (I would say I am sure but you just never know about people) this would ever happen. The narration is great, there were times I thought maybe some yelling should have been done but the narrator really does pull you in. He does give emotion and for the most part it is really good. I thought he did a good job. Cute and at times very funny.


Return to The Dirt - Paul J. McSorley (Narrator)
This story is about the making of bologna but it has a weird name I can’t remember. I knew there was a reason I didn’t like the stuff and I will never eat it again lol. Here you have three people who come together at a new job. They never really had a job or really want one. They are both unique in their own way. One day after taking part in what they enjoy doing, something happens that will change the life of all three of them. There is a part that I just looked on in shock as I picture the scene before my eyes. Let me tell you it isn’t one I will forget for a long time to come. Most likely I will remember this story each time I past the bologna at the store or any time anyone talks about this food. The narration was great the narrator really pulls you from so many points. His character voices are outstanding and fit the characters.


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I loved all the narrators in this box-set with the exception of The Relativist. The voice does not go with the characters and the music is way too loud at the beginning of each chapter. It is so loud you can barely hear what the narrator is saying. As for the rest of the box-set the music goes very well and blends well throughout the stories. There are not any background noises in any of the stories, if any breaks were taken I could not tell. I thought the performance for all of them but the one was outstanding, the character voices were great and I totally loved their narration. I would love to listen to more of the five narrators that I like. It was a pleasure listening to them. I loved the accents, as well as the female and male voices. I had no trouble knowing who was talking or what they were feeling. This was a very clean and clear audio that I really enjoyed.


The author is something else I have to say my favorite in this set is Jar Baby and Anything For My Bubela. Each story is unique, interesting and really pulls the reader in. I found the stories to be delightful, fun and shocking along with thrilling. I laughed, chuckled and felt sorry for a few. I sure hope my job never turns out like these did. I have never read anything by this author and look forward to listening to more of his audio and read more of his books.

9 of 10 people found this review helpful

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OMG FREAKING AWESOME

This is LMAO funny. I literally was laughing out loud in my car on the way home from work, and people who passed me had WTF faces but could tell I was LMAO. Great stuff! It's a collection of crazy stories, a little bit of everything, but if you're a wuss you might not be able to handle it. Buckle your seat belt folks, it's gonna be a wild ride. Great entertaining listen!! Highly recommended :)
I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • TU
  • 08-02-18

This was a crazy book but oh so entertaining!

I was given this free review copy audio book at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

This book was fantastically narrated and highly entertaining. It's a collection short stories, all pretty crazy, that are sometimes dark but often funny. It's honestly hard to quantify just what I liked so much... All I can really say is I was very engaged and loved the whole experience.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Twisted Humor

Occupational Hazards is a collection of twisted short stories that are sure to make you laugh! They can be a little gory and do contain language not suitable for a younger audience, especially the first story! Jar Baby was the first story in the series and it literally had me laughing out loud, and did all of the other stories. Jar Baby was definitely my favorite! The narrators we're absolutely perfect for each of the stories. Great stories by Geoff Sturdevant and definitely a great selection of narrators! If you love twisted humor, you will love this book!

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Humor and Horror in Equal Measures

This is a collection of dark and strange short stories. The protagonists are unlikely work-a-day normals (well that might be a stretch) in strange situations. Innovative and unique throughout, the author has a fresh approach to horror and humor. Rather than describe each story, it is preferable to give the overall theme and mood to the stories. Something strange happens and the character has to find a way to cope in his often mundane, ruined life. Most stories, while horrific are often very funny and always quirky. Also, they get progressively better as the collection moves forward. Stick with it, you get into a mindset of the author’s mind and start to enjoy each one a little more. There is something fresh and crazy here and that is difficult to find. You will likely want to listen to these again after a little time.

Each story is performed by a different narrator. Each does an excellent job, keeping the mood and character voices easily discernible. The production quality is excellent without flaws.

At the end of the collection, the author reads an essay about his motivations. It is a pleasant insight into the workings of an author and well worth the listen. It makes him human and someone you might like to have a beer with.

Occupational Hazards is well worth a listen, humor and horror in equal measure. Sometimes short stories are a welcome change to a lengthy novel. You are likely to come back to them and find something new on the second or third listen. Recommended.

Audiobook was provided for review by the author/narrator/publisher.

Please find this complete review and many others at my review blog.

[If this review helped, please press YES. Thanks!]

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Great!

I can honestly say I have never listened to an audio book quite like this one but I really enjoyed this! Entertaining stories that were a bit dark but also had some humor - this kept me interested from beginning to end. Every narrator did a wonderful job on narration for this one. These stories took me a bit out of my comfort zone but I really enjoyed it!

** A copy of this audio book was provided in exchange for an honest review**

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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An Omnibus of the bizarre...I couldn't stop

Where does Occupational Hazards: The Blue-Collar Omnibus rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

Please note, this book is for mature ears. There is harsh language throughout. That being said...

It truly stands on it's own. I've never heard such bizarre stories. All of the narrators were fabulous. I never once felt myself crashing down back to reality from the imagination spun by author Geoff Sturtevant and his fellow narrators. There were plenty of times I could be heard yelping aloud or saying 'ewww gross!' or just laughing out loud. What kind of book does that?! Mr. Sturtevant has quiet the imagination for the bizarre and for keeping me in the dark as to what was going to happen next. I appreciated his style of writing, which is very new to me.

I received a free copy from the author via audiobook boom. I voluntarily left an unbiased review. Thank you.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Jeff
  • 07-26-18

LOVED THE UNUSUAL TAKE ON EVERYDAY LIFE

LIKED THIS AND LOVED THE UNUSUAL TAKE ON EVERYDAY LIFE AND SITUATIONS I WANT MORE

0 of 1 people found this review helpful