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How Not to F*ck Up Your Kids Too Bad
- Narrated by: Stephen Marche
- Length: 5 hrs and 4 mins
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Publisher's summary
Modern parenting is in a complicated place. By some estimates, fathers today spend seven times more time parenting than their dads did. And while there are a ton of parenting books, writer Stephen Marche says that most are aimed at women and are designed to make them feel like they are doing something wrong.
Enter How Not to F*ck Up Your Kids Too Bad, an Audible Original. Across 10 chapters, Marche talks to real fathers and experts about thorny contemporary questions. He tackles everything from why yelling may be as bad as spanking to how to have tough conversations about racism in literature and how to talk to your kids about marijuana and porn in a way that won’t mess them up as adults…at least not too much.
Featured Article: The 10 Best Parenting Audiobooks
As many parents know all too well, there’s no official guide on how to raise your child. From all the ways you can show love and affection to the more difficult acts of helping them grow through discipline, each kid—and each family—is unique in what they need. A one-size-fits all approach doesn’t exist, which is why finding the advice and resources that best speak to you are so important. We’ve pooled together the top resources on parenting for all different styles and families, and parents looking for a wide breadth of advice.

Editor's Pick
Parenting is inevitably imperfect, but…
"After confessing to having yelled at my children in a particularly hangry moment the night prior, I asked Stephen Marche if he thinks parents should say they’re sorry after missteps. "Of course you should apologize to your kid" he told me. "I don't think showing vulnerability is ever a mistake. I really believe that." Marche also advocates for a nonjudgmental view of fellow parents (particularly when it comes to controversial approaches like free-range parenting), a realistic approach to how and when your kid should get a phone, and a surprising way of dealing with their inevitable discovery of porn. While it’s ostensibly directed toward the fathering side of the parenting equation, I can vouch for the fact that HNTFUYKTB has something to offer for us moms, too."
—Courtney R., Audible Editor
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What listeners say about How Not to F*ck Up Your Kids Too Bad
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Charles
- 05-31-18
So good
Finally, something besides the preachy prescriptions of pediatrician authors. I love the voices of real moms and dads in this. It's a very fun listen, and something I took a lot away from!
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9 people found this helpful
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- H. Currimbhoy
- 10-13-18
The one thing that changed how I am as a father
This book gave me a piece of advice that has changed me as a new parent: I do not use my phone or computer around my kid any more. Or at least, way, way less, and only when I have to. Thanks to this book I realized how kids seriously are effected by parents constantly staring at a screen, being there but not present at all. Its damaging and weird to be on our phones and not be paying attention to our kids, especially as fathers. We get a couple of hours here and there with our kids and we spend half of that time distracted by often total nonsense (social media, an email or text that can certainly wait) when our kids need affirmation, support, EYE contact. The book over all is a fun read, handles some questions I had not even thought of and gives real life insight with a good interviewer/host. There are no magic bullets. Just read/listen to this book and it will make you more conscious of your job. that's enough for me!
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8 people found this helpful
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- Onil Banerjee
- 06-10-18
disappointing
did not deliver what it claimed. nothing in book is more squarely aimed at parenting from fathers' perspective vs mothers'. deals with some headline issues but fails to capture day to day concerns of fathers. also does not distinguish concerns by age nor gender which can be relevant.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-26-21
Great listen!
This is a great listen for sure! My only complaint would be I wish it had more information on earlier life subjects, would have like to get this type of take on actually raising your kids from a baby and up and how really not to fuck that part up 😅
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2 people found this helpful
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- Sean
- 10-01-18
Simply Terrible
The ideas in this are very elementary and not well thought out.
It is presented more like a podcast than a book.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Sandra Escauriaza
- 09-11-18
Fantastic
It is fantastic, touches and questions some of most other same issues I have raising my child. It is open, inclusive and honest. His voice is beautiful and the format with other voices and interviews is genius. Thanks!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Wade Klinetobe
- 02-01-19
Interesting, funny at times and relatable.
Struggled in a few spots. This is not your dad's parenting guide. Very new age. Felt like it was missing content. No talk of sports or a thing that is even remotely manly. Oh what have we become?
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1 person found this helpful
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- Sean Johnson
- 08-09-18
Realistic and relevant
Fantastic listen with relevant points. The ideas shared on how to handle racist children’s books were great and put some tough topics in perspective for my wife and I. Thanks Audible!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Fred Niznik
- 01-25-23
Nice listen
Was fun to listen to to, educational and entertaining. Would definitely recommend to not just fathers but anyone with kids.
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- William A
- 12-04-22
Enjoy it
Some ideas, and meanings I find them wrong but I really enjoy it. I recommended if your gonna make your own research.
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All Joy and No Fun
- The Paradox of Modern Parenthood
- By: Jennifer Senior
- Narrated by: Jennifer Senior
- Length: 8 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Thousands of books have examined the effects of parents on their children. But almost none have thought to ask: What are the effects of children on their parents? In All Joy and No Fun, award-winning journalist Jennifer Senior tries to tackle this question, isolating and analyzing the many ways in which children reshape their parents' lives, whether it's their marriages, their jobs, their habits, their hobbies, their friendships, or their internal senses of self. She argues that changes in the last half century have radically altered the roles of today's mothers and fathers, making their mandates at once more complex and far less clear.
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The Joy of Parenting
- By Cynthia on 02-14-14
By: Jennifer Senior
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The Sh!t No One Tells You About Toddlers
- Sh!t No One Tells You Series #2
- By: Dawn Dais
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell
- Length: 5 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Coming from one empathetic parent to another, the tips in this book are real, clever, honest, and designed to make life with a terrible two- or three-year-old a little bit more manageable. Hilarious, helpful, and handy, this book will be appreciated by any parent who has asked: "Why didn't anybody warn me that unconditional love would be so much work?"
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Not research-based
- By Parenting Reader on 09-25-16
By: Dawn Dais
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The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting
- Raising Children with Courage, Compassion, and Connection
- By: Brené Brown
- Narrated by: Brené Brown
- Length: 2 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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On The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting, Dr. Brené Brown invites us on a journey to transform the lives of parents and children alike. Drawing on her 12 years of research on vulnerability, courage, worthiness, and shame, she presents ten guideposts to creating what she describes as "wholehearted" families where each of us can continually learn and grow as we reach our full potential.
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A very good refresher, but not her best book.
- By Filazafer on 06-06-15
By: Brené Brown
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Achtung Baby
- An American Mom on the German Art of Raising Self-Reliant Children
- By: Sara Zaske
- Narrated by: Sara Zaske
- Length: 7 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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When Sara Zaske moved from Oregon to Berlin with her husband and toddler, she knew the transition would be challenging, especially when she became pregnant with her second child. She was surprised to discover that German parents give their children a great deal of freedom - much more than Americans. In Berlin, kids walk to school by themselves, ride the subway alone, cut food with sharp knives, and even play with fire. German parents did not share her fears, and their children were thriving.
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this book failed its topic
- By Latinogirl on 04-28-18
By: Sara Zaske
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How Eskimos Keep Their Babies Warm
- And Other Adventures in Parenting
- By: Mei-Ling Hopgood
- Narrated by: Barbara Hayman
- Length: 7 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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A tour of global practices that will inspire American parents to expand their horizons (and geographical borders) and learn that there’s more than one way to diaper a baby. Mei-Ling Hopgood, a first-time mom from suburban Michigan - now living in Buenos Aires - was shocked that Argentine parents allow their children to stay up until all hours of the night. Could there really be social and developmental advantages to this custom?
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Narration is not good
- By Shelley on 12-23-13
By: Mei-Ling Hopgood
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Bringing Up Bébé
- One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting
- By: Pamela Druckerman
- Narrated by: Abby Craden
- Length: 9 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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The secret behind France's astonishingly well-behaved children is here. When American journalist Pamela Druckerman has a baby in Paris, she doesn't aspire to become a "French parent". French parenting isn't a known thing, like French fashion or French cheese. Even French parents themselves insist they aren't doing anything special. But French children are far better behaved and more in command of themselves than American kids....
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Inspiring
- By Em on 04-15-12
Related to this topic
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Can't Hurt Me
- Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds
- By: David Goggins
- Narrated by: David Goggins, Adam Skolnick
- Length: 13 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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For David Goggins, childhood was a nightmare--poverty, prejudice, and physical abuse colored his days and haunted his nights. But through self-discipline, mental toughness, and hard work, Goggins transformed himself from a depressed, overweight young man with no future into a US Armed Forces icon and one of the world's top endurance athletes. The only man in history to complete elite training as a Navy SEAL, Army Ranger, and Air Force tactical air controller, he went on to set records in numerous endurance events.
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Opting for the book instead
- By S David on 12-24-18
By: David Goggins
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The Art of War
- By: Sun Tzu
- Narrated by: Aidan Gillen
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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The 13 chapters of The Art of War, each devoted to one aspect of warfare, were compiled by the high-ranking Chinese military general, strategist, and philosopher Sun-Tzu. In spite of its battlefield specificity, The Art of War has found new life in the modern age, with leaders in fields as wide and far-reaching as world politics, human psychology, and corporate strategy finding valuable insight in its timeworn words.
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The actual book The Art of War, not a commentary
- By Fred271 on 12-31-19
By: Sun Tzu
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The Introvert's Survival Guide
- By: Fresh Produce Media
- Narrated by: Aparna Nancherla
- Length: 4 hrs and 13 mins
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The Introvert's Survival Guide, hosted by comedian Aparna Nancherla, is your portal to navigating a world cranked up to full volume. Get ready for each enlightening episode, where a surreal social nightmare complete with spine-tingling music is complemented by a roadmap to navigate through it.
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I learned something about myself
- By Carol S. on 09-18-23
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The 6 Habits of Growth
- By: Brendon Burchard
- Narrated by: Brendon Burchard
- Length: 5 hrs and 4 mins
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The world’s leading high-performance coach and multiple New York Times best-selling author Brendon Burchard delivers the six habits of personal growth that will help you create the life of your dreams. Forged from Brendon Burchard’s personal experiences, data from his GrowthDay app, and his many years as a high-performance coach, The 6 Habits of Growth presents the tools you need to construct the life of your dreams.
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Don’t bother
- By B. Sharpe on 10-30-22
By: Brendon Burchard
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Failure Is Not NOT an Option
- How the Chubby Gay Son of a Jesus-Obsessed Lesbian Found Love, Family, and Podcast Success...and a Bunch of Other Stuff
- By: Patrick Hinds
- Narrated by: Patrick Hinds
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Patrick Hinds has failed. A lot. In fact, he’s kind of an expert at it—which is why he’s uniquely qualified to say that failure is a good thing.
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Perfection!
- By Amazon Customer on 09-30-23
By: Patrick Hinds
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The Compound Effect
- Multiply Your Success One Simple Step at a Time
- By: Darren Hardy
- Narrated by: Darren Hardy
- Length: 4 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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