• He/She/They

  • How We Talk About Gender and Why It Matters
  • By: Schuyler Bailar
  • Narrated by: Schuyler Bailar
  • Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
  • 5.0 out of 5 stars (47 ratings)

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He/She/They  By  cover art

He/She/They

By: Schuyler Bailar
Narrated by: Schuyler Bailar
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Publisher's summary

Go‑to expert on gender identity Schuyler Bailar offers an essential, urgent guide that changes the conversation about gender identity and how we talk about it.

Anti-transgender legislation is being introduced in state governments around the United States in record-breaking numbers. Trans people are under attack in sports, healthcare, school curriculum, bathrooms, bars, and nearly every walk of life. He/She/They clearly and compassionately addresses fundamental topics, from why being transgender is not a choice and why pronouns are important, to more complex issues including how gender-affirming healthcare can be lifesaving and why allowing trans youth to play sports is good for all kids. With a relatable narrative rooted in facts, science, and history, Schuyler helps restore common sense and humanity to a discussion that continues to be divisively coopted and deceptively politicized.

Schuyler Bailar didn’t set out to be an activist, but his very public transition to the Harvard men’s swim team put him in the spotlight. His choice to be open about his transition and share his experience has touched people around the world. His plain-spoken education has evolved into tireless advocacy for inclusion and collective liberation. In He/She/They, Schuyler uses storytelling and the art of conversation to give us the essential language and context of gender, meeting everyone where they are and paving the way for understanding, acceptance, and, most importantly: connection. He/She/They is more than a book on allyship; it also speaks to trans folks directly, answering the question, “does it get better?” with a resounding yes, celebrating radical trans joy. Myth-busting, affirming, compassionate, and fierce, He/She/They is a crucial, urgent—and lifesaving—book that forever changes the conversation about gender.

©2023 Schuyler Bailar (P)2023 Hachette Go
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Categories: LGBTQ+

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The writer’s balance

Liked it all. Very helpful read. Thank you, your book was informative and helpful. I want to read more.

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  • DK
  • 03-16-24

Deeply insightful and illuminating

Helped me learn so much about both one person’s experience of being trans and the challenges that society presents to people who aren’t cis/het. Generously written and narrated. Highly recommend.

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Phenomenal book!

This is a wonderful book! I just finished listening to it, and also purchased a book to highlight several parts where the wording, ideas and stories touched my heart. Thank you thank you thank you for putting your heart into this amazing resource for allies, parents and the world. 🏳️‍⚧️

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Truly Outstanding

Schuyler is unbelievably insightful and thoughtful, and I found his way of explaining each topic so inclusive and kind. As the mother of a trans child I was already an ally, but now I can be an even better one because Schuyler chose to let us in and share his experiences.

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So beautiful and educational

What a joy to listen to as you smile, cry, laugh and shout along the way. Wonderfully educational for the ally who strives to understand in order to help protect and support.

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Very Enlighting Book

This book was a real eye opening. Schuyler has a very honest and open presentation that i found brought out things I had not thought about, I found the chapter on Toxic Masculinity (18) to be especially important to me in all the ways I was not doing enough to help break the toxic mold. It will help me greatly in my own journey. I will reread this book many times as a reminder of things that are so important to remember.

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brilliant

brilliant read/listen. a wonderful walk through Schuyler’s journey. a personal story that shows compassion and love for all of us. i am very thankful that this piece exists & i hope many people share this read in order to better educate ourselves on the ins and outs of a very personal journey. much love.

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Highly informative

A mix of personal stories and rigorous research. Learned a lot about transgender but still curious.

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Amazing take on trans existence!

As a Latino trans man beginning my gender affirmation journey, I really appreciated the intersectional scope Schuyler provided. He’s such an inspiration to our community and I love seeing trans content that isn’t made by a white person. Such an educational reas for cis and trans folk❤️🏳️‍⚧️

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Love my Trans Family

A memoir of love, pain, joy, education, fear, hope, and a future of being trans.

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