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Publisher's Summary

From the New York Times best-selling author of Have a New Kid by Friday comes a call to dads to step up to the plate to become the loving, actively engaged father that a daughter needs for life and relational success.

The relationship that matters most to your daughter isn't the one with her mother - it's the one with you, Dad. Her self-esteem, choices, behavior, character, and even her ideas about or choice of a marriage partner are all directly tied to you, as the most important representative to her of the male species.

In Be the Dad She Needs You to Be Dr. Kevin Leman, internationally-known psychologist, New York Times best-selling author, and father of four daughters, will show you not only how to get the fathering job done and done well, but also how to: 

  • Make each daughter feel unique, special, and valued
  • Discipline the right way...when it's needed
  • Talk turkey about what guys are really thinking
  • Keep the critical eye at bay
  • Wave the truce flag when females turn your family room into a battleground
  • Set your daughter up for life and relational success

With some effort on your part (and very few dollars), you can gain the kind of relationship you dream of with your daughter - one based on mutual love and respect. The simple yet profound suggestions will transform you into the kind of man your daughter needs...for a lifetime. 

©2014 Thomas Nelson (P)2014 Thomas Nelson

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • Overall
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Future or Present Fathers Should Get This Book

I don't know how to father a daughter - how would I? My relationship with my own father was not good, and even if it were, that is still father-son experience, not father-daughter experience.

Your daughter will look to you for encouragement, support, and unconditional love. Us men are better at fixing emotions than patiently bearing them with our loved ones. Similarly, the women in our lives don't always realize (how would they?) that keeping emotions under the hood is our way of protecting them, that is, our way of keeping from becoming too emotional ourselves and losing our sense of judgment, and then doing something stupid.

Nevertheless, we mustn't be afraid of feeling our emotions when we are and daughters. Keeping a cold distance from them, compensated by random bouts of "warmness," is both confusing and damaging to their development.

In "Be the Dad She Needs You to Be," by Kevin Leman, we learn how to protect our daughters without being overbearing, defend our daughters without becoming overly-defensive, and engage our daughters with love that is sympathetic and forbearing. Our daughters can be crazy, fun, adventurous, studious, capitulating, stoic, and everything in between; but at the end of the day, we Fathers are the ones who get to walk through those most difficult times in early life with them as reliable guides and rocks of refuge.

We can make it harder, by not understanding, or we can make it easier, by setting our own hurts aside and realizing that our childhood is completely irrelevant to their childhood. These daughters of ours are their own people who will someday head out into the world, and we can leave a good imprint on them, or a bad imprint on them, but we will leave an imprint, and the choice is up to us.

There is something within all of us that makes things which we would never consider doing to our friends or acquaintances seem somehow okay to do to our own family members. I don't know what this nature is, but I know it's wrong, and that circumspect guidance from people like Dr. Kevin Leman is essential if we want to be proud of the decisions we made when we look back upon our lives from our deathbeds.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Life-changing

This book has helped me look at my and the legacy I'm leaving with my four daughters. He provides examples that you can implement in your relationships. This will definitely be a book that I come back to again. Thank you for telling us your story

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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Great book for all dad's

I'm going through a divorce right now not by choice I encourage all dad's to read this book and educate themselves on becoming a better father even if your already a great father

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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Awesome book

I really enjoy this book. It will definitely give you a new outlook on raising daddy's little girl.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Daniel
  • Jerusalem, Israel
  • 10-06-14

AMAZING

I loved it!
Excellent book for every dad of daughters!
Great performance. I'm actually listening to it now for a second time!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • RJ
  • 02-18-16

Started out ok but went sideways.

Mr Lemans makes several good points but then it turns a bit religious for me. I would recommend this to religious people.

2 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Putting my finger to back of my throat...gaagggg😲

This guy totally misses that we Dads already feel bummed our about our dad/daughter relationships. He continues to hit us with all of his achievements and Princess dad daughter examples. Nobody wants to hear that BS. It's like he's fluffing himself up at our expense talking about all the TV shows that he's been on and celebrities that he knows in order to increase his value with us. Who cares? most disappointing book I've read on Amazon hands down!!!! the only reason I'm going to struggle through the rest of it is because I spent my money to listen to it😒😒😒😒

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So out of touch

This book is so out of touch with where the world is now.
Utter waste of time.

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Good Book!

This is a good book and provides a good overview of how to be a good dad.

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A list of 1950's stereotypes, nothing insightful.

If you are looking for over-simplifications, unsubstantiated generalities and a visit to 1950's-era stereotypes, this may be the ideal book for you! However, if you are looking, as I am, for useful insights into the intricacies of a father-daughter relationship, look elsewhere. The book fell apart for me in the opening chapter with unsupported declarations about "how men think and act" versus "how women think and act" and continued to go downhill further in, with off-topic generalizations about people's behavior as a function of birth order (even quoting Huffington Post as an apparently scientific source, no less!), and a surprisingly unsettling discussion of how daughters should be taught to expect and accommodate their husband's sexual "needs" even though women may have little or no outright interest themselves. If it were only, I don't know, 1958 maybe? A lost episode of :"Father Knows Best" may be hidden in the book somewhere.... At any rate, I listened to about two thirds (4 hours) of the book and decided I would be much better served to use my listening time elsewhere.

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  • Onewave
  • 08-13-17

blue-pilled stuff

good if you want to be a 1950s type dad. the useful advice is all in the first few pages. 'god-almighty' gets frequent mentions. cringe factor 10 for the awakened male.

1 of 2 people found this review helpful