Don't Eat Your Human Boyfriend

By: Lily Mayne

Narrated by: Michael Lesley

I like to describe myself as an ethical ghoul.

I've been working at Broth with a Bite in the Creepy Court Mall food court for eight years so that I can get my… very specific nutritional needs in a way that doesn't make me feel like too much of a monster. I work in the "special" kitchen, preparing food for our customers with the same, ahem, dietary issues, and I'm totally fine working alongside the humans who run the other kitchen and have no idea what's actually served.

Until the new guy starts. The new human guy with the cutest shy smile and the raddest hair and a body that makes my mouth water. He looks like a very decent mouthful and smells like the best five-course meal rolled into one.

Suddenly, Ricky is all I can think about. Sweet, delicious Ricky who has no idea he's working in a restaurant for ghouls, who has no idea ghouls even exist, and who I just want to take a big bite out of. Not, like, literally. Kind of.

It's totally wrong for a ghoul to lust after a human. They're food. But I can't help it. I want Ricky bad. I just have to remember to keep my teeth in check.

Contains mature content. A complete list of content warnings can be found on the author's website.

©2023 by Lily Mayne (P)2026 Podium Audio

Highly entertaining!

I’m not sure what I enjoyed more—the story or narration. It’s a must listen, no doubt! I need more set in this world. Or if Ricky and Elliot.

Sweetly Indulgent

Just a quick fun, charming, and spicy listen. Absolutely adorable relationship with sweetie pie main characters. As always, this author always manages to insert humorous dialogue in a way that makes the character’s personalities seem so genuine.

So cute!

This was the perfect sweet and spicy little palate cleanser after a dark series! It will definitely be a go-to for me when I just need a cute, swoony read with the perfect amount of spice. Lily Mayne can do no wrong in my eyes and the narration was just perfect! ❤️

Wholesome characters

Loved the characters! They were wholesome and so fun and cute! Loved their relationship and how they were drawn to each other!

Workplace Monster Romance

I love this story - I've read it several times in multiple formats. I read it in the original short story included in the creepy court anthology, the extended standalone version, and then snatched up this audio. I normally don't like romance short stories because there isnt enough time to develop a relationship, but this one works for me. Michael Lesley also isnt always my favorite narrator (I'm sorry, I know he is widely beloved) but I felt like his voices worked for this one. pick this one up - you wont regret it.