The MisreadBible: Genesis

By: J. R. Eldridge

Narrated by: Joshua Saxon

A collection of twisted Bible tales from the warped mind of J. R. Eldridge, brought to life by the mellifluous voice of Joshua Saxon.

Embark on a journey from the creation of the universe to the arrival of the Israelites in Egypt in this blasphemously funny retelling of the Book of Genesis.

A lonely deity creates the Earth in his mother’s basement and makes a little clay man who falls in love with his own rib. After the humans engage in some freaky angel sex, God decides to flood the entire world, saving only a drunkard called Noah and his family.

Once the humans have repopulated the Earth, God chooses one man called Abram, drags him from his home in the middle of the night, changes his name, and then tells him to kill his son, forming an everlasting covenant with him and his descendants.

Later, Jacob steals his brother’s birthmark, boinks his cousins, and comes up with an innovative way to breed sheep. He fathers a dozen kids including Joseph, whose brothers get tired of his dreams of grandeur and sell him to some shapeshifting Ishmaelites who take him to Egypt.

©2019 J. R. Eldridge (P)2019 J. R. Eldridge

An absolute panic!

This book is funny! The author is obviously quite familiar with the book of Genesis. Anybody that believes that the bible is the literal word of the almighty should stay far away from this audio book. For the rest of us, this version is breath of fresh air. It's sarcastic, insightful, and a panic to listen to. Joshua Saxon does a first class job with the narration. His delivery is perfect.

I am eagerly looking forward to Exodus! I can just imagine what J. R. Eldridge is going to do with Moses, Pharaoh, the 10 Plagues and the Golden Calf!

I was given a free review copy of the audio book at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

Strange, blasphemous, hilarious.

First I will cover what this book is not...It is NOT politically correct. It is NOT for the devoutly religious. It is NOT for the easily offended. If any of these describe you, just stop right here and avoid this book. But if these descriptions pique your interest, then this might just be the book for you. And as blasphemous and sacrilegious as this book is, I would not be at all surprised if it led many of its readers/listeners directly to the Bible, if only to discover the source material for the stories and to investigate what parts come from Eldridge's warped mind and what parts are actually from the Bible.

If you are not easily offended, then there is a good chance you will find this book hilarious.

The narration is absolutely perfect, with Saxon giving just the right amount of snark to the text. I can't imagine any other narrator doing a better job with this.

I was given a free copy of this audiobook in exchange for an honest review, which I have voluntarily left here. There was no smiting involved.

HYSTERICAL

From start to finish - the Bible as it should be told. From the stylings of Monty Python meets Douglas Adams, and done with the many voice talents of Joshua Saxon - who...as GOD, gives you an angry Leprechaun....and it works on so many levels! I had to stop and start because I couldn't stop laughing throughout. From start to glorious ending, quite the twisted tale of the Book of Genesis. I cannot wait to hear the sequel~!

Wicked

Far more entertaining than anything I heard in chruch. Highly recommended. Blasphemy at it's finest.

Don't pass this one up!

The author gave me an audio copy to review.

I really enjoyed this book. I laughed so hard at the part where Abraham was ninjaing dudes foreskins off that I almost wrecked while driving. So you may not want to listen to the audio book while driving.

This is really well done. The narrator of the audio book is amazing.