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Publisher's Summary

After having been trapped in his office for 10,000 years, Lacerto, the god of small to medium-sized lizards, escapes to seek revenge. They say when you go looking for revenge, dig two graves. If you're a god, make sure one of them is the size of Mount Olympus. To keep himself out of that grave, Lacerto will have to win and wield a divine weapon that takes the form of a brutally sarcastic salamander, take on the entire pantheon of gods, and control a human lawyer to whom he accidentally assigned godlike power when she became his pope. But at least there will be alcohol. And snark.

©2016 Maxwell Cantrell (P)2017 Maxwell Cantrell

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Pratchett-Christopher Moore-Douglas Adams-ish

My first idea when I started this story was that Christopher Moore had sex with Terry Pratchett while Douglas Adams cheered on. Hilarious, raunchy, violent and super duper awesome. I highly recommend the audiobook as the voice artist elevates the ballsy story with vocal flourishes, technical prowess and enlivens each character with mastery. I felt like a happy, drunken demi-god when I was finished with this book. Cheers.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Great listen!

If you are looking for a listen with plenty of laughs, you’ve found it! Great story with fun characters, I loved the Salamander of Ishtar and Lacerto. I was frequently laughing while listening to this, the narrator’s performance was fantastic and really made the listening experience. I received a free review copy of this audiobook at my request and I have voluntarily left this review.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • TU
  • 12-08-17

Oddball and entertaining!

I was given this free review copy audio book at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

So, this was very odd, but quite entertaining. I laughed out loud several times and found that I enjoyed this book. The narrator put great personality into the voices and I would listen to more from him. This isn't intended to be a work of great literature, and doesn't take itself seriously. So, if you're looking for a heavily sarcastic, funny and all together silly tale about infighting gods, you should check this one out.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Clever, witty, odd but fun book!

A Tale of Gods, Mortals, and Jell-O Shooters
By: Maxwell Cantrell
Narrated by: Christopher J Mayer
This is an audible book I requested and the review is voluntary.
I thought this book was clever, witty, and a bit childish (and I laughed at those parts the most), and I enjoyed it! It had fun parts, sad parts, silly and emotional parts. A lesser god is trapped and then when he gets, by accident, a follower he is released from his captivity. He wants revenge. He lets this emotion take over. There are some great characters in here and weird other gods. The strange situations he gets himself in, and his only friend, doesn't seem to bother him. The end is excellent. Really odd book but I liked it and can't tell you why! The narrator was great! He really was funny!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

Corny As They Come

This was was a little crazy at points and funny at others. I feel that the narrator did a fantastic job and you can feel his personality show through


I received this audiobook at no-cost from Audiobookworm Promotions. The gifting of this audiobook did not affect my opinion of it.

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

Sometimes Just Silly

Silly and interesting to a point. I found myself at multiple points in this story just pausing and thinking "wth?". Yes multiple times. I put off writing this review because I had no clue what to think about any of this, but I've settled on silly. The main character is dense, the sidekick/weapon/strong lizard is a sarcastic, but in a corny way. The book is violent. It has a plot and it's pretty straight forward. This is definitely one of those books that you can't just describe to someone else. They would need to experience it for themselves. It's okay and interesting. I received this audiobook at my request for free and left this review voluntarily

1 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Corny.

Silly, arbritrary nonsense does not equate to humor (example: one of the countries is named "Cookie Dough"). I thought this was a book for middle-school readers until Chapter 9, where the f-word is used at an unnecessary consistency.

Other small things in this book were very annoying:
-Impossibly as an adjective (impossibly sharp/annoying)
-Use of the word "multiverse" as something that can be shouted across
-The author's obsession with alcohol or randomly using 10,000 years as the universal unit for a long time.

The humor is stupid, arbitrary, and ultimately a waste of time.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars

Not the book for me.

While at times this book was entertaining, unfortunately I found that it was often just silly and I could not understand the target audience. The words and phrases used were often very young sounding but the theme of the book was aimed for an adult audience.
Christopher James Mayer did a reasonable job with the narration but ultimately I didn't find this enjoyable to listen to.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

Not for me....

I was really excited to listen to this book but as it turns out it is nothing like what I expected. It is too strange and out there for my tastes. I received a review copy at my request and voluntarily reviewed.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

Silly

I couldn't finish this book. I attempted more than once but it was too silly and weird. Although I did laugh a little, I just found it to be strange and unexciting. The characters were immature and the storyline was too far "out there" for my taste. I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful