Mostrando resultados por narrador "Nick John" en Todas las categorías

Make sure the kids aren’t around! Just because you’re a grown-up doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the art of the children’s bedtime story. Nick Offerman presents this collection of 12 short stories written in the style of a classic kids' tale, but with a decidedly dark and adult approach. What really happened after Snow White died, from the perspective of the one medically trained dwarf? A naive wizard professor reports back from the trenches of an underprivileged school of magic. And much more!

Are the kids asleep? Yes? Good. This one isn’t for them. Now, if your weary, grown-up mind has been searching for a snarkier alternative to your favorite childhood tales, this Audible Original, hosted by Nick Offerman (Parks & Recreation), will scratch that itch - and then some. Enjoy a hilarious collection of short stories, featuring performances from the likes of Tommy Chong (Cheech & Chong), Tony Hale (Veep), Patton Oswalt (The Goldbergs), and David Spade (Saturday Night Live).

These stories and more are featured in the third short story anthology for the System Apocalypse, continuing the saga of survival in a world transformed by the arrival of the System. Humanity has adapted to a new reality filled with Classes, magic and monsters, but the struggle for life, love and purpose never ends. This anthology brings together gripping tales from returning authors and two new short stories by Tao Wong.

In 2003, the first ever late-night talk show hosted by a 10-year-old boy premiered live for six minutes, before it was violently pulled from the air and abruptly canceled. Its host, Donnie Dixon, hasn’t been heard from since.

In the realm of Imphallion, there once was a nightmare - a living nightmare known only as the Terror of the East. Nigh invulnerable in his magical black armor and aided by unholy minions, he laid waste to all in his path on his all-consuming quest to bring order to the land. His order. Then, at what should have been his moment of triumph, his will failed. And his army fell. Taking a young noblewoman as hostage, he escaped, vanishing into darkest memory.

Duff MacCallister has just returned from a trip back to his native Scotland - more determined than ever to build a new future in Chugwater Valley, Wyoming. But Duff will do it his way, buying up a herd of rare Scottish black angus from the Kansas City market. He can’t know that his dream is threatened by a man driven by one desire: to take other people’s money and other people’s lives.

Gavin Guile, once the most powerful man the world had ever seen, has been laid low. He's lost his magic, and now he is on a suicide mission. Failure will condemn the woman he loves. Success will condemn his entire empire. As the White King springs his great traps and the Chromeria itself is threatened by treason and siege, Kip Guile must gather his forces, rally his allies, and scramble to return for one impossible final stand.

Gavin Guile, once the most powerful man the world had ever seen, has been laid low. He's lost his magic, and now he is on a suicide mission. Failure will condemn the woman he loves. Success will condemn his entire empire. As the White King springs his great traps and the Chromeria itself is threatened by treason and siege, Kip Guile must gather his forces, rally his allies, and scramble to return for one impossible final stand.

After breaking from life with the Pack, mercenary Kate Daniels and her mate–former Beast Lord Curran Lennart–are adjusting to a very different pace. While they’re thrilled to escape all the infighting, Kate and Curran know that separating from the Pack completely is a process that will take time. But when they learn that their friend Eduardo has gone missing, Kate and Curran shift their focus to investigate his disappearance. As they dig further into the merc’s business, they discover that the Mercenary Guild has gone to hell.

Colter Farrow was just a skinny cow-puncher when the men came to Sapinero Valley and murdered his best friend, whose past as a gunfighter had caught up with him. Now, Cole must strap on his Remington revolver, deliver some justice, and make a reputation of his own.

Apropos is a rogue, a rascal, a scoundrel, a cheat...and those are his good points. Lame of leg but fast of wit, the only reason Apropos doesn't consider chivalry dead is because he's not yet through with it. An orphan with a chip on his shoulder, Apropos, travels to the court of the good King Runcible, with three goals in mind: to find his father, seek retribution for the death of his mother, and to line his own pockets. However, Apropos carries the most troublesome burden a would-be harbinger of chaos can bear: He may well be a hero foretold, a young man of destiny.

Mick Oberon may look like just another 1930s private detective, but beneath the fedora and the overcoat, he’s got pointy ears and he’s packing a wand.

After being attacked by a demon in the one place he thought he was safe, Eric Carter has been killed, his soul sent to take its place as a stand-in for the Aztec god of death Mictlantecuhtli. But somebody on Earth isn't done with him, yet. Somebody with the power to bring him back from the dead. He doesn't know who, and worse he doesn't know why. Between an angry death goddess, family secrets steeped in blood, a Djinn who's biding his time, and a killer mage who can create copy after copy of himself, Eric's new life looks to be just as violent as his last one.

Abandoned by her allies, the Republic of Venice holds out as the last beacon of resistance against the hobgoblin armies. Armed with new weapons the Southern Horde drives upon the floating city by land and sea. The Northern Horde drives deep into the heart of Europa and all fall before it. The Horde is vast beyond measure. Assassin daggers lurk in every shadow. Necrotic evil seeps and infects.

It's been three years Bethany Anne and her team have been building, trying their best to stay off the radar and not fight with those they are trying to save. The emotions have boiled to the surface. The is a line drawn in the sand, and some idiots just have to step across it. Those that thought the cat didn't have claws are about to find out how very, very wrong they are.

Andrew Dare is a werewolf. He’s the enforcer for the Roanoke pack, and responsible for capturing or killing any Were intruders in Roanoke’s territory. But the lone Were he’s tracking doesn’t smell or act like anyone he’s ever encountered. And when he catches her, it doesn’t get any better. She’s beautiful, she’s crazy, and someone has tortured her by injecting silver into her veins. She says her name is Silver, and that she’s lost her wild self and can’t shift any more.

A New York Times bestseller: A graphic novel of war and its aftermath. A powerful, compulsively page-turning, vivid, and moving tribute to the experience of war and PTSD, The White Donkey tells the story of Abe, a young Marine recruit who experiences the ugly, pedestrian, and often meaningless...

When Eric Carter helps a friend with a deadly ritual that could determine the fate of the most powerful mage family in Los Angeles he steps into the middle of centuries-long feuds with people who make the Borgias look like the Brady Bunch. Eric's just fine with the murder, soul eaters, and death magic. He's just having trouble adjusting to being brought back from the grave. If he's not careful, somebody's going to put him right back.

From the bestselling author of Assassination Vacation and Unfamiliar Fishes, a humorous account of the Revolutionary War hero Marquis de Lafayette—the one Frenchman we could all agree on—and an insightful portrait of a nation's idealism and its reality. On August 16, 1824, an elderly French...

A taste of what you'll find: 13 unhinged POVs, tropical island forced proximity for all, superheroes x villains x aliens x a very irritated pregnant normie, MM romance (and a little FF, too), everybody gets some (and it's filthy, duh, men in corsets, hoochie daddy shorts, and Gambit crop tops, slooty besties having slooty fantasies about each other (good thing their stellar collisions are into it), rabble chat in every chapter (on top of the IRL ballbusting), feel-good family moments and all the schmoop, and the usual naughty humor and witty banter.