Why is it so hard for gay men to make close friends? In this episode, host Dustin explores the friendship crisis many queer men face and offers practical, research-backed strategies to build deeper, more meaningful connections.

Learn the difference between romantic and friendship attraction, how emotional safety shapes queer friendships, and why vulnerability is key to connection. Dustin also shares actionable tips for overcoming defensiveness, initiating low-pressure social rituals, and building community beyond dating and hookup culture.

Whether you’re feeling lonely, craving real friendships, or simply trying to understand why queer connection can feel so complicated, this episode offers clarity, validation, and hope.

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com⁠⁠

Episode Guide & Chapters

00:00 Introduction to the Podcast and Topic

03:18 Understanding Queer Loneliness

11:43 The Importance of Queer Friendships

18:23 Navigating Vulnerability in Queer Friendships

18:35 Navigating Attraction and Friendship Among Gay Men

21:26 Understanding Vulnerability in Queer Friendships

24:13 Tools for Building Connections

27:23 Creating Consistent Rituals for Friendship

30:14 Practicing Patience and Grace in Friendships

33:09 The Importance of Authenticity and Vulnerability

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver

In this episode of boy meets therapy, Dr. Luke Wilson shares his firsthand experience with conversion therapy, from enrolling at Liberty University to facing the emotional and psychological toll of trying to change his identity. Dr. Wilson opens up about the deep shame, religious pressure, and inner conflict he experienced, and how he ultimately found healing and self-acceptance. This honest conversation explores the dangers of conversion practices, the intersection of faith and sexuality, and the resilience it takes to reclaim your truth. Whether you are a survivor, an ally, or seeking to understand, this episode offers insight, compassion, and hope.

Dr. Wilson's book of conversion therapy survivors' stories Shame-Sex Attraction is available for pre-order now.

Connect with Luke Wilson, PhD:

Instagram: @lukeslamdunkwilson

Academic Papers: utschools.academia.edu/LucasWilson

Pre-order Shame-Sex Attraction (USA): link here

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com⁠⁠⁠

Episode Guide & Chapters:

00:00 Introduction and Academic Credentials

03:06 Exploring Identity and Sexuality

06:00 Liberty University: A Conservative Christian Institution

08:47 The Journey into Evangelicalism

12:07 Conversion Therapy: Understanding the Context

14:52 Personal Experiences with Conversion Therapy

17:41 Navigating Queerness in a Conservative Environment

26:06 The Journey into Conversion Therapy

32:26 The Impact of Conversion Therapy on Identity

43:48 Shame and Its Role in Conversion Therapy

48:37 Reflections on Personal Growth and Projection

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver

In this episode of boy meets therapy, host Dustin Oliver is joined by therapist Liz Rhea for an honest and deeply moving conversation about religious trauma and queer identity. Together, they unpack how adverse religious experiences can shape self-worth, relationships, and mental health, particularly for LGBTQ+ individuals. Liz shares her clinical insights on the effects of sermons and church environments, while exploring the power of deconstruction, inner child work, and grief processing in healing. This episode offers both personal and therapeutic perspectives on what it means to navigate religious trauma and find safety, self-acceptance, and liberation in therapy.

Whether you're deconstructing your faith, supporting a loved one, or working through your own trauma, this conversation is a must-listen.

Connect with Liz Rhea:

Instagram: ⁠@lizrheatherapy⁠

Website: ⁠www.lizrheatherapy.com⁠

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com⁠⁠

Episode Guide & Chapters:

00:00 Introduction and Background

03:09 Understanding Religious Trauma

06:13 The Impact of Environment on Trauma

09:07 Experiences of Religious Trauma

12:08 Personal Stories and Reflections

15:10 Navigating Identity and Faith

17:46 Exploring Queer Identity and Community

19:12 The Process of Deconstruction

23:07 Reclaiming Identity and Rituals

24:47 The Impact of Religious Trauma

28:04 Understanding Sin and Identity

31:39 Creating Safe Spaces in Therapy

36:02 Inner Child Work for Queer Individuals

37:12 The Framework of Grief in Healing

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver

In this powerful episode, Dustin Oliver sits down with therapist Natalie Reina to explore the deep and lasting effects of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and the transformative power of somatic therapy in trauma recovery. Together, they unpack how childhood trauma shapes adult mental health, why recognizing patterns from abusive relationships is so difficult, and how grounding techniques and body-based therapies help clients reconnect with safety and self-awareness.

Whether you're a mental health professional, trauma survivor, or simply curious about holistic approaches to healing, this conversation offers valuable insight into how integrating mind and body can lead to long-term emotional recovery. Learn how ACEs impact the nervous system, what somatic therapy actually looks like in practice, and why creating safety is the first step in any therapeutic relationship.

Connect with Natalie Reina:

Instagram: @reinatherapy

Website: https://reinatherapy.com/

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com

Episode Guide & Chapters:

00:00 Exploring Personal Lore and Travel Experiences

03:08 Understanding Trauma in Therapy

06:12 Adverse Childhood Experiences and Their Impact

08:57 The Role of Somatic Therapy

11:58 How Trauma Manifests in the Body

14:59 Building Trust in Therapeutic Relationships

17:59 Recognizing Signs of Unresolved Trauma

24:35 The Journey of Self-Discovery

30:41 Connecting with the Body

34:40 Blending Therapeutic Modalities

40:21 Navigating Trauma and Relationships

45:03 Understanding Domestic Violence

48:09 Words of Wisdom

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver

In this episode, host Dustin Oliver sits down with psychiatrist Dr. Joseph Elfar for a thought-provoking conversation on the evolving role of psychiatry in mental health care. Dr. Elfar opens up about his personal journey into psychiatry, the importance of self-disclosure in clinical work, and how social media is transforming mental health awareness.

We dive deep into the realities of medication management, the influence of Big Pharma, and the cultural factors that impact psychiatric treatment. Dr. Elfar also shares insights on the value of validation and confrontation in therapy, the challenges new professionals face in the field, and why self-love and emotional insight are crucial for healing.

Whether you're a mental health professional, student, or someone curious about the inner workings of psychiatry, this episode offers a raw and accessible look at the intersection of mental health, culture, and modern psychiatry.

Connect with Dr. Joseph Elfar:

Instagram: @josephelfar.md

TikTok: @josephelfarmd

Website/Services: mindhealthpsychiatric.com/

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com

Episode Guide & Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Background

03:16 The Role of Psychiatrists in Mental Health

06:09 Personal Journey into Psychiatry

09:15 Navigating the Transition from Student to Professional

12:14 Understanding Medication in Psychiatry

15:13 The Impact of Social Media on Mental Health Awareness

18:12 Diagnosis and Treatment Approaches

21:08 The Art of Psychopharmacology

25:34 The Impact of Social Media on Mental Health

29:57 Cultural Sensitivity in Psychiatry

35:11 The Balance of Validation and Confrontation in Therapy

39:07 The Influence of Big Pharma on Psychiatry

43:46 Understanding When to Consider Medication

44:40 Challenges in Psychiatric Care

48:23 Life Lessons and Quotes to Live By

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver

Struggling to fall asleep or stay asleep? Wondering if melatonin, sleep hygiene, or therapy actually work? In this episode, sleep therapist Tony Ho joins us to unpack the most common sleep disorders, including insomnia and sleep apnea, and what you can do to finally get quality rest.

Tony breaks down the science of sleep, the psychological blocks that keep people awake, and why trying to "control" sleep can backfire. We explore the effectiveness of cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I), the real deal with melatonin supplements, and how cultural beliefs about productivity and rest shape our sleep habits. Tony also shares his personal sleep routine and practical tools you can start using tonight.

Whether you're dealing with chronic insomnia, poor sleep quality, or just want to understand your sleep better, this episode offers expert insight and actionable strategies.

Connect with Tony Ho

Instagram: @quadrawellness

TikTok: @quadrawellness

Therapy (Canada): www.quadrawellness.com/

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com

Episode Guide & Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Calming Voices

01:32 Journey into Sleep Therapy

04:22 Understanding Insomnia and Sleep Struggles

05:22 The Importance of Predictability in Sleep

06:56 Understanding Sleep Disorders

09:50 Exploring Insomnia and Its Treatments

12:46 Debunking Sleep Myths and Misconceptions

15:51 The Role of Blue Light and Sleep Hygiene

17:12 Melatonin: Benefits and Misunderstandings

20:25 The Psychology of Sleep and Relaxation

23:03 Rebuilding Trust with Sleep

26:48 Understanding Sleep and Its Impact

30:03 Cultural Influences on Sleep

35:53 Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia

42:10 Personal Sleep Routines and Insights

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver

In this episode, host Dustin sits down with therapist Lauren Larkin to unpack the complex relationship between disordered eating, diet culture, and mental health. Together, they explore how societal pressures, personal history, and media influence body image and eating behaviors, especially in the age of social media and virtual therapy. Lauren shares her journey from a career in media to becoming a clinician, offering insights into how her background shapes her approach to treating eating disorders. The conversation also touches on the challenges of remote therapy, the importance of curiosity in the healing process, and how therapists can create safe, supportive environments for recovery. If you're navigating disordered eating, interested in the intersection of media and mental health, or curious about therapy in the digital era, this episode is for you.

Connect with Lauren Larkin:

Instagram: @leltherapy

TikTok: @leltherapy

Website: www.leltherapy.com

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com

Episode Guide & Chapters

00:00 Welcome to New York: First Impressions

02:07 Journey from Media to Therapy

05:01 Understanding Eating Disorders vs. Disordered Eating

09:00 The Impact of Diet Culture on Men

12:01 The Dangers of Social Media and Body Image

14:54 Treatment Approaches and Personal Experiences

20:13 Integrating Recovery into Daily Life

21:18 Navigating the Healing Journey

24:41 Understanding Eating Disorders and Therapy

28:07 The Impact of Food Noise on Mental Health

31:50 Uncovering Deeper Issues in Therapy

35:05 Coping Mechanisms and Client Engagement

38:57 Inspiration and Personal Growth

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver

In this episode, therapist and former Broadway performer Brian Spitulnik joins Dustin to explore the intersections of shame, identity, and healing within the gay and broader queer community. Together, they unpack themes like internalized homophobia, social hierarchies among gay men, and the emotional toll of self-sabotage and rejection.

Brian opens up about his personal transformation, from life on the stage to becoming a clinician, and how embracing authenticity and vulnerability changed his path. The conversation delves into how race, body image, and trauma show up in therapy spaces, as well as the unique challenges queer people face in finding belonging and self-acceptance.

Whether you're a therapist, LGBTQ+ person, or ally, this episode offers a compassionate, insightful look into the emotional and relational landscape of queer identity, and how therapy can support deeper connection and growth.

Connect with Brian Spitulnik

TikTok: @spitulnik

Instagram: @spitulnik

Website: www.brianspitulnik.com/

Connect with boy meets therapy:

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@boymeetstherapy⁠⁠⁠⁠

Website with Free Resources: ⁠⁠⁠⁠boymeetstherapy.com

Episode Guide & Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Identity Exploration

03:04 Understanding Shame in Gay Men

06:02 Self-Sabotage in Relationships

09:01 Social Hierarchy in Gay Culture

12:11 The Role of Therapy in Building Connections

14:52 Personal Journey and Professional Focus

17:54 Authenticity and Defense Mechanisms

29:28 The Journey to Authenticity

30:46 Vulnerability and Connection

33:14 The Weight of Shame

35:41 Navigating Identity in Different Environments

39:36 Coming Out and Acceptance

41:36 Rejection in the Queer Community

43:38 Therapeutic Dynamics and Race

48:47 The Complexity of Conversations

51:52 Lessons from Tragedy

Created and Produced by Dustin Oliver