Ever sat in your car outside an event, heart racing, stomach in knots, every cell in your body screaming don’t go in, but guilt dragged you anyway? In this episode, Dr. Misty dismantles the toxic myth that keeping every commitment equals moral worth. You’ll learn the neuroscience behind why saying no is an act of nervous system protection, how to spot your body’s “quit signals” before burnout hits, and practical strategies for bailing, gracefully, unapologetically, and without drowning in guilt. Perfect for neurodivergent, queer, trauma-impacted, and chronically overcommitted rebels ready to reclaim their energy, boundaries, and agency.

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• (00:00:00) - Why You Should Be Able to Bail
• (00:02:20) - What Is The Commitment Culture?
• (00:05:21) - When Your Nervous System Reacts to Commitments
• (00:10:12) - How to Exit From Dysregulated Sit
• (00:15:00) - The Art of Strategic Abandonment
• (00:15:55) - Why You Should Abandon Your Boundaries
• (00:20:42) - This Week's Act of Strategic Abandonment
• (00:21:11) - When Your Body Refuses to Serve You
• (00:22:11) - Rebelling Against Your Nervous System

What happens when your body aches for more touch than your partner, friend, or family can give—or when you crave space while someone else longs to connect? In this radically honest episode of Untamed Ember, Dr. Misty dives deep into the science, shame, grief, and negotiation of “touch hunger” and mismatched touch needs. Discover why touch is a real biological need, how neurodivergence, trauma, fat liberation, and disability justice shape who gets touched (and who doesn’t), and get practical tools, scripts, and rituals for navigating the awkward, brave, and beautiful work of honoring your body’s truth. Whether you’re touch-starved, touched-out, or somewhere in between, this episode is your permission slip to need what you need—without apology. Share, reflect, and join The Ember Vault for more embodied, inclusive community.

• (00:00:00) - How To Get Physical Touch
• (00:00:47) - What Is Touch Hunger?
• (00:06:05) - What You Need to Know About Mismatched Touch Needs
• (00:12:06) - What Kind of Touch Need Do You Have?
• (00:18:54) - How to Deal with Unmet Touch Need
• (00:26:45) - You're allowed to ask for more touch this week

Is waiting agony for you? Do you feel anxious when a conversation goes quiet, or does time vanish when you’re hyperfocused? In this episode of Untamed Ember, Dr. Misty unpacks how ADHD and neurodivergent brains experience time differently—why pauses can feel like punishment, and why mismatched tempos create conflict, shame, and communication breakdowns. You’ll get a science-backed, radically honest look at time perception, plus practical tools and conversation scripts to make your own “time warp” visible and workable in relationships, work, and daily life. Perfect for neurodivergent folks, partners, friends, and anyone ready to ditch urgency culture and honor their real rhythm. Listen, share, and join the Untamed Ember rebellion—because your tempo isn’t a flaw, it’s your superpower.

Subscribe to Untamed Ember wherever you get your podcasts, and join The Untamed Ember Newsletter at untamedember.kit.com for more deep dives, resources, and freebies.

• (00:00:00) - Introduction: The Agony of Waiting
• (00:00:34) - Understanding Neurodivergent Time Perception
• (00:01:36) - The Neuroscience Behind Time Blindness
• (00:04:35) - Impact on Conversations and Relationships
• (00:12:37) - Practical Tips for Fast Processors
• (00:14:25) - Practical Tips for Slow Processors
• (00:15:59) - Navigating Time Warps in Relationships
• (00:19:33) - Time Perception in Work and School
• (00:21:51) - Time Perception in Intimacy and Friendships
• (00:24:41) - Daily Life and Survival Strategies
• (00:26:20) - Conclusion: Embracing Your Unique Tempo

Subscribe to the Untamed Ember newsletter for free resources, weekly insights, and more SOFT practices: untamedember.kit.com.

Are you haunted by old stories in your sex life—shutdowns, freeze responses, numbness, or shame that shows up right when you most want to be present? In this episode, Dr. Misty takes you deeper than talk therapy, into the places your body holds ancestral scripts about pleasure, safety, and desire—sometimes generations deep. Discover how your fascia acts as the body’s living archive, and learn the basics of SOFT (Somatic-Oriented Fascia Therapy), Misty’s original approach for working with tissue-level memory and nervous system liberation.
You’ll hear stories, get practical ways to notice your “ghosts,” and find out why your pleasure isn’t something you have to earn—it’s your birthright.

• (00:00:00) - Misty on Ghosts in the Bedroom
• (00:03:04) - What Fascia Really Does to Your Body
• (00:10:32) - Soft Therapy for Awakening the Ghost of Sexual Performance
• (00:16:41) - When Your Body's Haunted by Old Stories

Grab your FREE worksheet and weekly shame-smashing resources at untamedember.kit.com — where every part of you belongs.

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Ever notice that right when things get steamy, your brain turns into a Twitter feed of insecurity? Welcome to the world of parts work, sex edition. In this episode, Dr. Misty dives headfirst into Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy and how your inner critic, perfectionist, rebel, caretaker, and shame-burdened exiles all love to crash your sex life.

We’re talking about:

• Why sexual difficulties are rarely about “technique”—and almost always about internal parts fighting for airtime

• How the Performance Manager, Hypervigilant Protector, People-Pleasing Caretaker, and your spicy inner exiles hijack your pleasure

• Specific, actionable strategies to check in with your parts, speak for them, and actually integrate their wisdom instead of letting them run wild

• Neurodivergent masking, sexual spontaneity, and why you might feel disconnected or stuck in performance mode (again)

• Real talk: The parts of you that want connection, the ones that want control, and how to get them working together instead of fighting for the mic

Ready to turn your internal chaos into conscious, embodied pleasure? Listen in, download your worksheet from The Ember Vault, and start negotiating with your inner committee—no shame, no judgment, just radical acceptance.

—

Subscribe for weekly resources: untamedember.kit.com
Podcast + show notes at untamedember.com
—

#SexTherapy #InternalFamilySystems #PartsWork #SexualHealing #NeurodivergentSex #ShameFreeSex #QueerSexuality #TraumaInformedSex #UntamedEmber #SexualLiberation

• (00:00:00) - The Critic in Your Sex Life
• (00:02:05) - How to Love Your Sexual Life
• (00:02:59) - What Are the Parts of Your Sex Life?
• (00:09:27) - How to Work With Exile Parts in Sex
• (00:14:25) - How to Work With Protective Parts in Sexual Life
• (00:20:51) - Working With Your Parts in Sexual Relationships
• (00:22:08) - Partners Awareness

Get weekly, radical resources and bonus episodes free at untamedember.kit.com — Your pleasure deserves better.

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Ever wondered why your brain is a full “hell yes” but your body suddenly ghosts the moment things heat up? Or why your nervous system sabotages even the sexiest situations? In this no-holds-barred episode, Dr. Misty goes full trauma nerd on the vagus nerve—that misunderstood highway running between your brain, your body, and your ability to actually stay present for pleasure.

We’re not talking about generic “just relax” advice or another meditation app download. We’re hacking your actual sexual nervous system with trauma-informed, neurodivergent-friendly, science-backed strategies. Discover:

• Why your vagus nerve can’t mind its business during sex (and how it becomes an accidental cockblocker)

• How chronic stress, trauma, and neurodivergence set the stage for “nervous system sabotage”

• The real reason arousal sometimes flips to anxiety, shutdown, or sensory overwhelm—and what to do about it

• Practical, immediately usable hacks for vagus nerve stimulation, breathwork, movement, and sensory support before and during sex

• Why the neurodivergent brain needs rituals and “transition time” for pleasure—and how to build them

This episode is for every beautifully complex, neurodivergent, queer, or trauma-impacted human who’s tired of being shamed for their body’s boundaries. Your sexual nervous system isn’t broken—it’s just never been given the tools (or the respect) it deserves. Let’s fix that.

Listen in, reclaim your body’s pleasure wiring, and don’t forget to grab your free worksheet in The Ember Vault.

• (00:00:00) - Introduction: The Mysterious Vagus Nerve
• (00:01:50) - Understanding Vagal Tone and Sexuality
• (00:02:47) - The Role of the Vagus Nerve in Sexual Response
• (00:05:23) - Challenges Faced by Neurodivergent Individuals
• (00:07:02) - Common Patterns of Vagal Dysfunction During Sex
• (00:09:40) - Daily Life and Its Impact on Vagal Tone
• (00:12:20) - Practical Interventions to Improve Vagal Tone
• (00:18:33) - Morgan's Transformation: A Case Study
• (00:21:28) - Specific Techniques for Common Sexual Difficulties
• (00:23:56) - Conclusion: Embracing Your Nervous System

Ever had sex with a partner who was physically present but clearly somewhere else? Welcome to the “What the Fuck Just Happened?” club. This episode is for every partner who’s ever wondered why their neurodivergent, trauma-impacted, or just beautifully complex lover seemed to disappear mid-connection—while their body kept going through the motions.

Dr. Misty (Untamed Ember) breaks down what dissociation really looks like during sex, why it’s not a Yelp review of your skills, and how to create the kind of safety that brings your person back—without pressure, shame, or performance. Learn how to spot the subtle signs, what to do (and NOT do) when it happens, and why real intimacy means honoring nervous system reality, not just consent on paper.

We’re throwing out the toxic scripts about sexual perfection, reclaiming what it means to love someone with trauma, and getting nerdy about co-regulation, nervous system signals, and non-performative presence. Bonus: Grab the partner’s worksheet in The Ember Vault for scripts, rituals, and reflection tools. Listen to the Untamed Ember podcast wherever you get your podcasts, and join The Ember Vault for weekly deep-dive worksheets at untamedember.com.

• (00:00:00) - The Secret to Intimate Sex With a Ghost
• (00:02:10) - This Is What Really Happens During Sex When Your Partner Dissoci
• (00:07:37) - How To Help Your Partner When They're Dissociated
• (00:10:34) - What to Do When Your Partner's Sexual Body Is Distracted
• (00:16:58) - How to Support a Partner Who Dissociates During Sex
• (00:20:21) - How to Support a Trauma Survivor During Sex
• (00:22:21) - How to Love Your Partner's Sexual Dissociation

Get weekly free resources and bonus podcast episodes—sign up for the Untamed Ember newsletter at untamedember.kit.com.

Ever felt like your body was sabotaging you during sex, even when your mind and heart were all-in? In this episode, Dr. Misty unpacks the wild world of somatic therapy and why your body’s “weird” responses are actually wisdom in action—not dysfunction. We’ll break down how shame, trauma, and neurodivergence shape our sexual scripts, and why honoring your authentic needs is the most revolutionary act of all.

This episode covers:

• The science of why bodies freeze, tense, or check out during intimacy (even with safe partners)

• SE, Hakomi, and TRE—somatic tools that let you finally listen to your nervous system (instead of fighting it)

• How to create a personalized “sexual map” so you know exactly what your body needs to feel safe and turned on

• Radical embodiment, embodied consent, and how to build authentic sexual healing without performance, perfection, or shame

Includes real stories, hands-on practices, and that signature Untamed Ember mix of humor, rebellion, and real talk.

Don’t forget: This week’s worksheet, “Your Sexual Somatic Intelligence Map,” is waiting in the Ember Vault at untamedember.com.

You are not broken. Your body is brilliant. And sexual healing starts when you finally learn to speak your body’s language.

#SexTherapy #Somatic #BodyWisdom #NeurodivergentSex #QueerSexEd #TraumaInformed #UntamedEmber

• (00:00:02) - What If Your Body Is the Problem With Sex
• (00:03:09) - Your Body Is Trying to Protect You From Sex
• (00:06:10) - Somatic Experiencing, or SE for short
• (00:09:24) - What Is Haikomi?
• (00:12:12) - TRE: Consent to Move Your Body
• (00:17:29) - The Sexual Practices You Need to Start Using
• (00:24:30) - This Week's Sexual Somatic Intelligence Map
• (00:26:51) - Untamed Women: Misty with