Do your relationships keep triggering old wounds? In this episode of The Crazy Ex-Wife’s Club, therapist Melissa Lapides breaks down how anxious and avoidant attachment styles show up after divorce—and how to finally heal them.

Whether you’re newly divorced, co-parenting, or opening your heart to love again, this conversation will help you stop repeating painful patterns and reclaim your emotional power.

🔑 Key Themes & Takeaways

• What attachment wounds are and how they form in childhood
• How anxious and avoidant attachment styles show up in love and divorce
• Why sitting with emotions leads to deeper healing
• Practical tools to separate real needs from emotional triggers
• How to stop letting old wounds bleed into new relationships

⏱️ Episode Timestamps

• 00:00 Intro

• 02:22 Understanding attachment wounds

• 05:28 Navigating separation & divorce

• 06:21 Healing through self-awareness in divorce

• 08:10 The role of mirroring in relationships

• 09:01 Communicating needs in relationships

• 21:27 Embracing acceptance in relationships

• 22:10 The power of communication & compromise

• 25:01 Nonviolent communication techniques

• 29:13 Building emotional resilience

• 30:48 Self-discovery & personal growth after divorce

• 33:34 Navigating new relationships post-divorce

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  🌟 Resources & Links

  Join The Club: A Divorce Community to Help You Get Clear, Get Grounded & Move Forward
  👉 Grab your spot now

  
  

  Connect with Melissa Lapides (Licensed Psychotherapist & Founder of Securely Attached)

  • Website: getsecurelyattached.com

  • Instagram: @getsecurelyattached

  Connect with The Crazy Ex-Wife’s Club

  • Instagram: @thecrazyexwivesclub

  • Facebook: The Crazy Ex-Wife’s Club

• • Website: thecrazyexwivesclub.com

  
  

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  If this episode resonated, don’t keep it to yourself—follow the podcast, share it with a friend, and join The Club for ongoing support on your healing journey.

What really happens when a marriage begins to fall apart? In this episode, Dr. Becky Whetstone—author of I Think I Want Out—reveals the 5 predictable stages of a marriage crisis and how to know if you should stay, or move on with clarity.

Whether you’re unhappily married, newly separated, or years post-divorce, this conversation offers validation, strategy, and hope.

🔑 Key Themes & Takeaways

• The 5 stages of marriage decline (and how to spot them)

• The roles of the “decider” vs. the “leaning in partner”

• Why calming your nervous system is step one in a crisis

• Practical tools for separation, co-parenting, and resilience

• • How self-care turns heartbreak into healing

  
  

  ⏱️ Episode Timestamps

  00:00 Intro
  04:03 Understanding Marriage Crisis
  07:31 The Five Stages of Marriage Deterioration
  14:05 Roles in Marriage Crisis: Decider vs. Leaning In Partner
  22:18 Understanding the Leaning In Partner's Instincts
  26:03 The Importance of Managed Separation
  29:51 Finding Strength in Self-Discovery
  35:14 Embracing Authenticity in Relationships
  40:50 Final Thoughts and Resources

  
  

  🌟 Resources & Links

  Join The Club (first stop for support):

  Looking for your new divorce bestie? Join the Club for 24/7 support as you rebuild post-divorce.

  👉 Grab your spot NOW

  
  

  Connect with Dr. Becky Whetstone:

  • Website: marriagecrisismanager.com

  • Instagram: @doctorbecky

  • Facebook: Relationship Crisis Manager

  • Book: I (Think) I Want Out

  Connect with The Crazy Ex-Wives Club:

  • Instagram: @thecrazyexwivesclub

  • Facebook: The Crazy Ex-Wives Club

  • Website: thecrazyexwivesclub.com

Co-parenting after divorce is tough—and it gets even harder when a new partner enters the picture. Do you collaborate with your ex’s new partner, or set firm boundaries?

In this episode of The Crazy Ex-Wives Club, I share real stories from both sides—navigating life with a stepparent as a parent, and stepping into the role of stepparent myself. You’ll hear the honest truths about blended families, boundaries, and how to protect your kids’ wellbeing while choosing peace over drama.

🔑 Key Themes & Takeaways

• The biggest risks (and benefits) of working with your ex’s new partner

• Why clear intentions and boundaries matter more than ever

• How to handle the “two vs. one” power dynamic

• Tools to manage triggers and choose peace over drama

• Why blended families are the new norm—and how to make them work

Remember: at the end of the day, it’s not about winning against your ex or their partner—it’s about what’s best for the kids.

⏱️ Episode Timestamps

• 00:00 – Intro

• 02:12 – Personal Experience with Stepparenting

• 02:48 – Navigating Intentions and Expectations

• 07:26 – Creating a Co-Parenting Plan

• 09:08 – Challenges and Emotional Triggers

• 16:02 – Mediation and Legal Complications

• 18:40 – Lessons Learned and Final Thoughts

• 20:52 – Setting Boundaries in Co-Parenting

• 22:10 – Creating Clear Boundaries

• 24:20 – The Emotions of Co-Parenting

• 27:46 – Navigating Blended Families

• 30:08 – The Role of a Stepparent

  
  

  🌟 Resources & Links

  The Club: A Divorce Community to Help You Heal & Move Forward
  An online space to get support and guidance on your divorce journey. Whether you’re unhappily married or navigating co-parenting after divorce, The Club gives you the clarity and grounding you need.
  👉 Grab your spot now

  The Emotions of Co-Parenting Program
  A self-guided journal + video series to help you anchor yourself, manage emotional storms, and create the stability your kids need.
  👉 Check it out here

  Connect with The Crazy Ex-Wives Club

  • Instagram: @thecrazyexwivesclub

  • Facebook: The Crazy Ex-Wives Club

• • Website: thecrazyexwivesclub.com

  
  

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  Loved this episode? Don’t keep it to yourself—share it with a friend going through divorce. 💌

  And if you’re ready for more support, join The Club today. This is your space to heal, grow, and create the future you (and your kids) deserve.

  👉 Join The Club

What if the pain you’ve been carrying after divorce isn’t just “in your head”… but living in your body? In this episode of The Crazy Ex-Wives Club, Erica sits down with Loni Markman, a neuro-somatic life coach, to explore how somatic healing helps release divorce trauma and rebuild core confidence.

Together, they unpack the difference between “Big T” and “little t” trauma, how hidden experiences shape our behaviors long after divorce, and why creating safety in your own body is the foundation for moving forward.

From breathwork and EFT tapping to progressive muscle relaxation and daily “miracle minutes,” you’ll walk away with practical tools you can use immediately to calm anxiety, regulate your nervous system, and start reclaiming your confidence.

🔑 Key Themes & Takeaways

• The difference between “Big T” trauma and the smaller, stackable experiences that add up over time

• How trauma shows up in relationships long after the divorce is final

• Why creating safety in your body is the first step toward healing

• Tools like breathwork, EFT tapping, and progressive muscle relaxation to calm your system

• The importance of noticing “glimmers” (moments of joy) as much as “triggers”

• How self-abandonment chips away at confidence—and how to repair it

⏱️ Episode Timestamps

• 00:00 Introduction

• 02:17 Big T vs. Little T Trauma

• 04:56 Personal Experiences and EMDR

• 08:25 Self-Listening and Safety

• 17:32 Small Steps to Reprogramming

• 23:14 Overcoming Despair & Finding Wins

• 31:44 Tools for Emotional Regulation

• 32:13 Breathing Techniques for Calmness

• 36:16 EFT Tapping & Muscle Relaxation

• 40:47 Building a Supportive Community

• • 44:05 Final Thoughts & Encouragement

  
  

  🌟 Resources & Links

  The Club: Your Divorce Healing Community
  A supportive space to get clear, grounded, and moving forward—whether you’re still married and uncertain or taking your first steps through divorce.
  👉 Join here: thecrazyexwivesclub.com/theclub

  
  

  Connect with Loni Markman

  • Website: lonimarkman.com

  • Instagram: @powerhouse_by_loni

  • Facebook: Loni Markman

  • Facebook Group: Powerhouse Healing Community

  
  

  Connect with Erica / The Crazy Ex-Wives Club

  • Instagram: @thecrazyexwivesclub

  • Facebook: The Crazy Ex-Wives Club

  • Website: thecrazyexwivesclub.com

  
  

Starting over after divorce isn’t just about signing papers, it’s about surviving the emotional whiplash, reclaiming your identity, and eventually thriving in your new normal. In this season finale of The Crazy Ex-Wives Club, I break down the 3 phases of divorce and why the process makes even the strongest women feel like they’re “going crazy.”

From the heartbreaking “Do I stay or go?” stage, to rediscovering who you are outside of marriage, to finally thriving in your new normal, I walk you through what each phase looks like, and how to navigate them without losing yourself. I also share the raw truth about emotional overload, identity collapse, and why triggers like being called “crazy” can cut so deep.

Whether you’re still in the decision phase, knee-deep in separation, or figuring out co-parenting, this episode is packed with insights, encouragement, and a reminder that you’re not alone in this journey.

🔑 Key Themes & Takeaways:

• The 3 phases of divorce: Stay/Go, Rebuilding, Thriving

• Why divorce makes you feel “crazy” (emotional whiplash explained)

• How to know when you’re really ready to move on

• Identity collapse and rediscovering who you are

• Coping strategies to protect your energy, boundaries, and sanity

We talk about:

• 00:00 Introduction

• 01:29 The Emotional Rollercoaster of Divorce

• 03:34 The Three Phases of Divorce

• 26:45 Setting Boundaries Before Dating

• 29:09 Deciding to Stay or Go

• 30:06 Finding Your Way Forward Quiz

• 31:12 Why Divorce Feels Crazy

• 35:30 Emotional Whiplash and Identity Collapse

• 38:16 Gaslighting and Self-Doubt

• 41:06 Cognitive Overload and Isolation

• 48:20 Rebuilding and Moving Forward

The Club: A Divorce Community to Help you Get Clear, Get Grounded and Move Forward.

There is a new online space for you to get the support and guidance you need on your divorce journey. The Club is your space to heal, grow and get clear on what you want - whether you are unhappily married or taking those first steps through divorce.

Grab your spot NOW: https://www.thecrazyexwivesclub.com/theclub

Other Links 🔗

• 🔗Website: https://thecrazyexwivesclub.com

  🔗 Pussy: A Reclamation by Regina Thomashauer https://amzn.to/3V7Cva7

  🔗 Quiz: https://www.thecrazyexwivesclub.com/quiz-what-phase-are-you

  
  

  #DivorceRecovery #DivorceHealing #LifeAfterDivorce #DivorceJourney #ThrivingAfterDivorce #DivorceTips #DivorceSupport #StartingOverAfterDivorce #CoParentingTips #RebuildingLifeAfterDivorce #DivorceCommunity #DivorceEmpowerment

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