Episodios

  • Recovery Week Reflections
    Sep 19 2025

    This episode engages the topic of abuse, particularly sexual abuse. Listener discretion is advised.

    Dr. Dan Allender and Linda Royster, LCMHC—two of the leaders of our Recovery Week experiences—come together to reflect on the heart and history of this sacred work.

    Dan shares about the origins of Recovery Week in 1988, a gathering that began with a bold hope: that healing is possible for those carrying the wounds of childhood sexual abuse. Linda offers her own story of first encountering The Wounded Heart and the ways it opened her to the possibility of transformation.

    Together, they invite us into a deeper understanding of what it means to hold both the personal and the collective—acknowledging that no one suffers in isolation, but always within systems and contexts that shape our stories. Linda speaks to the profound intersections of racial trauma and sexual abuse, and the complex layers of shame that can silence and fragment survivors.

    Recovery Weeks create a space to move toward those particularities of the harm you’ve experienced—where you may want to freeze, minimize, or look away—and to take the courageous step of naming what is true. The goal is not to erase or resolve shame, but to walk through it, opening the way for transformation.

    This conversation is an honoring of the decades of work poured into Recovery Weeks, and a heartfelt invitation: to those who come, your presence is already a profound act of courage. Our hope is that you might encounter a deeper healing that makes way for new life.

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    47 m
  • The Cost and Gift of Creativity in Relationships with John and Sue Cunningham
    Sep 12 2025

    We are made in the image of a wildly creative God—and that means creativity lives in each of us. Yet, while it flows freely in childhood, many of us lose touch with it as adults, buried under busyness and productivity. What would it look like to recover creativity—not just for ourselves, but within our closest relationships?

    This week, Dan and Becky Allender sit down with longtime friends John and Sue Cunningham, who are both creative in their own right. John is a potter, Sue is a poet, and together they’ve discovered both the beauty and the challenges of nurturing creativity in their marriage.

    Their conversation explores:

    • The vulnerable (and sometimes costly) work of encouraging creativity in one another

    • How creativity can be both communal and connecting, and also deeply individual and isolating

    • The patience, generosity, and curiosity that can support your partner’s creative passions

    • Practical ways to offer meaningful feedback and engagement without shutting each other down

    Whether you write, paint, play music, garden, or simply long to bring more beauty into your life, this episode will encourage you to see creativity not only as a personal practice—but as a vital part of your relationship.

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    47 m
  • Bickering, Kindness, and the Deep Roots of Love
    Sep 5 2025

    Marriage isn’t only shaped by the big events and ruptures—it’s also shaped by the little things. The small arguments that seem to surface again and again, the shifts in family roles as children grow up and move out, and even the physical changes that come with aging can quietly wear away at a relationship if left unspoken.

    In this episode of the Allender Center Podcast, Dr. Dan and Becky Allender are joined by Dr. Steve and Lisa Call to revisit the topic of marriage following the release earlier this year of their book, The Deep-Rooted Marriage.

    Together, they name the everyday tensions—like bickering over household tasks or navigating the emotional weight of an empty nest—that can strain a relationship.

    More importantly, they share how couples can stay “buoyed together” through kindness, curiosity, and honest conversation. From asking simple questions like “What’s going on for you?” to practicing story work that helps us understand the deeper histories beneath our conflicts, this conversation offers hope and guidance for cultivating resilience and intimacy in marriage.

    Whether you’re facing small resentments, major life transitions, or simply longing for more connection, this episode invites you to consider how kindness, curiosity, and story work can deepen your relationship.

    Please Note: This episode contains some mature language; listener discretion is advised.

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    46 m
  • Blog Title “Enneagram and Marriage” with Christa Hardin
    Aug 29 2025

    What does it take to thrive in our relationships—not just survive—and how can the Enneagram help us along the way?

    In this episode of The Allender Center Podcast, Rachael Clinton Chen sits down with Christa Hardin, founder of Enneagram + Marriage and author of “The Enneagram in Marriage: Your Guide to Thriving Together in Your Unique Pairing.” Christa brings years of wisdom from her own relationship, plus her expertise as a marriage coach and therapist, to offer a hopeful, honest perspective on why personality awareness matters—but why it’s never the whole story.

    Together, Rachael and Christa explore:

    ✔ Why joyful feelings (and even celebration) can feel harder than conflict—and what that reveals about us.

    ✔ Christa’s concept of the Glow Stages in relationships—what they are, why we can’t live on the mountaintop forever, and how to navigate the necessary valleys with grace.

    ✔ How the Enneagram helps us honor our gifts, name our shadows, and stay curious about ourselves and each other—whether in marriage, parenting, dating, or our spiritual lives.

    ✔ Why love, when nurtured well, not only transforms a marriage but becomes a force for calling, courage, and blessing in the world.

    Whether you’re single, newly married, in the trenches of parenting, or decades into a partnership, you’ll find wisdom here for becoming more wholehearted—and more deeply connected. We invite you to listen to discover how your story, your marriage, and your love can grow through every stage.

    Get the completely FREE extra chapter of “The Enneagram and Marriage: Your Guide to Thriving Together in Your Unique Pairing” here: https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/hiddenchapter

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    52 m
  • Moving from Broken to Beloved with Brian Lee
    Aug 22 2025

    Spiritual abuse can shatter trust—not only in people and institutions, but sometimes even in God. It can leave survivors wondering if healing or belonging is possible on the other side of betrayal.

    In this conversation, Rachael Clinton Chen is joined by Brian Lee, founder of Broken to Beloved. Brian shares his story of growing up as a pastor’s kid, becoming a pastor himself, and eventually facing the reality of spiritual abuse in his own life. Out of that painful journey, he has learned the daily work of reminding himself—and others—that no matter what has been taken, we are still beloved.

    This work doesn’t happen in isolation. Brian and Rachael name the importance of the wider movement—survivors, advocates, pastors, and therapists—who are rising up to expose abuse and create spaces of honesty, care, and repair. Together they remind us that while spiritual abuse is devastating, it does not have the final word.

    You can learn more about Broken to Beloved at brokentobeloved.org.

    Plus, this fall, we hope you’ll join Brian, Rachael, and a host of other speakers at the Broken to Beloved Gathering in Richmond, VA, this October 10-11, 2025. Tickets are available at: https://www.brokentobeloved.org/gatheringinterest

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    57 m
  • Being a Faithful Witness in Harrowing Times with Rev. Marcos Canales & Rev. Dr. Robert Chao Romero
    Aug 15 2025

    What does it look like to stand with a community through fire—both literal and systemic?

    In this conversation, Rev. Marcos Canales and Rev. Dr. Robert Chao Romero join Rachael Clinton Chen to share their experiences leading and loving the Latino community in the Los Angeles area, especially during recent times of crisis. From homes lost and families displaced by devastating wildfires this year to the crushing weight of recent unjust immigration policies that threaten daily survival, these realities are urgent and relentless.

    Amid these challenges, they share how they create space for lament, fierce hope, and necessary rest in their lives as leaders. They show what it means to bear witness with empathy, stand in true solidarity, and nurture resilience when the world feels like it’s falling apart. Beyond politics, agendas, and policies, their witness points to a deeper hope in Jesus—one that sustains, heals, and empowers communities to keep moving forward.

    We invite you to listen, learn, and be moved by their wisdom—shaped by personal and communal healing.

    You can learn more about La Fuente Ministries and how you can support their work: https://www.lfmpasadena.org/

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    58 m
  • “Raising Securely Attached Kids” with Eli Harwood
    Aug 8 2025

    What if the secret to more connected parenting isn’t about getting everything right — but about showing up enough to make things right when you don’t?

    In this week’s episode, Rachael Clinton Chen talks with Eli Harwood, aka @attachmentnerd — licensed therapist, award-winning author, and one of Instagram’s most trusted voices on attachment and parenting.

    They dive into how our own attachment stories shape the way we relate to our kids, why being “good enough” really is enough, and how creating space for repair and consistency beats striving for perfection every time.

    With a blend of science, personal stories, and down-to-earth advice, Eli reminds us that secure attachment isn’t about flawless parenting — it’s about presence, patience, and showing up again and again.

    Whether you’re navigating the younger years, parenting teens, or unpacking your own childhood experiences, this conversation offers hope, grounding, and a fresh perspective.

    Visit her at AttachmentNerd.com where you can listen into her podcast, join the Nerd Herd, or even book an attachment coach. You can also follow her on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook @attachmentnerd. And don’t forget to check out her books: Securely Attached: Transform Your Attachment Patterns into Loving, Lasting Romantic Relationships and Raising Securely Attached Kids: Using Connection-Focused Parenting to Create Confidence, Empathy & Resilience.

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    50 m
  • Trauma, Grief, and Disrupting Death-Dealing Systems with Dr. Jamie Eaddy
    Aug 1 2025

    If you’ve ever struggled to make space for your own grief—or wondered why so many people around you seem to push through pain without tending to it—this episode offers a compelling and liberating invitation.

    Host Rachael Clinton Chen and guest co-host Wendell Moss sit down with Dr. Jamie Eaddy. Dr. Jamie is a thanatologist, which is a professional who studies and provides support related to death, dying, bereavement, and grief. She is also a grief and death doula, a healer, and the founder of The Ratchet Grief Project®. Jamie’s work centers especially on the Black community and other marginalized groups whose grief is often overlooked or dismissed. She invites us to see grief not as a private burden or spiritual failing, but as a sacred, communal, and even political process.

    Together, they name the systems that make it hard for us to grieve—particularly in communities shaped by Christian triumphalism, generational survival strategies, systemic racism, and the pressure to “keep going” at all costs.

    Dr. Jamie challenges death-dealing theologies that shame us for being human and normalize suffering as something deserved or redemptive. Instead, she offers a vision of a God who grows with us, who is expansive, and who longs for us to be fully alive.

    This episode is a call to reclaim grief as part of what it means to be human—and to reimagine our faith, our communities, and our systems to reflect that truth. If you’re longing for permission to pause, to feel, and to be held in the midst of loss, we hope this conversation will meet you right where you are.

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    53 m