** If you found this podcast helpful, please share it with a friend! I'll be super grateful and your friend will be happy that you thought of them too 🤗 **

In today’s podcast episode we’re talking specifically about cross-cultural introverts.

What’s a cross-cultural introvert? A cross-cultural introvert is an introvert who navigates multiple cultural. They’re people who move between cultures whether you’re working abroad or you’re bringing your multicultural perspective to your work or professional role.

What’s unique for cross-cultural introverts is that you need to balance your natural introverted character with the demands of navigating multiple cultural contexts.

When you’re “in between” cultures like that, it’s normal to feel a little out of place.

A lot of introverts I know have a similar experience when it comes to being an introvert. You feel slightly out of place because, let’s face it, the world is still geared mostly towards extraverts, especially in Western cultures. A lot of introvert are told that they need to change themselves in order to be accepted, appreciated or successful.

I've learned that actually the opposite it true.

In this podcast episode you'll learn why and discover what actually works to manage your energy well and feel confident as an introvert, no matter how circumstances change.

You’ll also learn about the taster sessions Habit Building Basics for cross-cultural introverts. 5 days, 5 topics, 15 minutes a day to help you rethink your habits and figure out what actually works.

Sign up for Habit Building Basics here: http://go.thefrankermessage.com/welcometobacktobasics

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00:00 the Exploring Introvert monthly update

00:44 what's a cross-cultural introvert

02:23 when you’re not really a local (anymore)

03:37 feeling out of place (in between cultures and as an introvert)

04:08 what does this have to do with energy management?

05:09 why most traditional advice doesn't work

08:23 why you need personal pillar habits

10:04 What I've been up to this month

10:59 Habit Building Basics: 5-day taster for cross-cultural introverts

12:05 what exactly is a taster?

13:27 get a personal focus session worth €150,- for free

13:59 Habit Building Basics: 5 days, 5 topics, 15 minutes a day

15:26 recap of the main take aways

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Sign up for Habit Building Basics: http://go.thefrankermessage.com/welcometobacktobasics

Related episodes:

🎦 010 Are you a "low energy person”?

🎦 054 Introverts lack discipline and have no energy...?

⭐ Follow the podcast: Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD

⭐ Contact me: contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠⁠

⭐ Visit my website: ⁠⁠thefrankermessage.com

Breaking a Bad Habit: An Introvert's Journey from Social Media Exhaustion to Mindful Language Learning

Ever found yourself doom scrolling through social media when you're exhausted, only to feel more drained afterward? As an introvert and certified habit coach, I discovered one day that I was spent 6 hours on Instagram reels.

It was a wake up call!

What started as a way to "relax" turned into a vicious cycle of exhaustion and procrastination.

In this video, I'll share my personal experience and the science behind breaking a bad habit.

You'll learn:

• Why the 21-day habit building rule is actually a myth (but can still be useful!)
• How to use the science of habit loops to transform your habits
• A practical example of how I replaced social media doom scrolling with more productive activities
• Why consistency matters less than you might think

If you're an introvert struggling with energy management and finding yourself caught in unhealthy habits, this video will show you how you can start to change that.

Plus, discover how I went from 6 hours of reels to learning Spanish, getting better sleep, and feeling more accomplished at the end of each day. This isn't just about breaking a bad habit - it's about creating sustainable changes that work with your energy needs as an introvert.

Subscribe for more insights on habit building, energy management, and productivity strategies specifically designed for introverts.

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00:00 This month I dove into habit formation and breaking a bad habit

00:43 My experiment to stop doom scrolling on IG reels

01:41 When relaxation turns into a bad habit

02:53 Truths and myths: How long before a habit become automatic and how important is consistency really?

03:15 Three elements of habit building: CUE - BEHAVIOR - REWARD

04:30 What’s the 21-day rul?

07:30 You don't need to repeat a habit every day for it to be effective

07:49 Even though it's a myth, the 21-day rule can still be useful

09:07 How important is it to be consistent?

10:47 breaking a bad habit: replacing doom scrolling with language learning

14:03 What can you learn about habit building from this?

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🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert Letters: https://go.thefrankermessage.com/subscribe

📍 Visit my website: ⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/

⁠🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

Too busy or too tired? Here are 4 habits to stay sane.Here’s a question that I get all the time: what habits do you focus on when things are really hectic and you have no time?This month has been just that, so I thought I’d take you on a walk today and we can talk about it. What has made this month so hectic is that I’ve taken on a project that I knew from the start was going to be a difficult project. It involves a lot of different people and there’s a lot of emotions and even some conflicts. I decided to take it on because I know that I’m the right person to help right now. But it’s a difficult situation and I knew really early on that this project was going to take a lot out of me. Now, if you’re working in a team or organization, you may not always be able to pick your projects. So maybe you’ve been in a similar situation where you have a project where you immediately know that it’s going to be hard. What can you do to still do a good job and keep your sanity at the same time?Come with me on my walk today and we’ll talk about 4 habits to keep your sanity in hectic times.00:00 Habits for hectic times00:49 Tricky project this month01:34 4 habits to keep your sanity with a difficult project02:19 Accepting that it's going to cost more energy03:18 Habit #1: how to set boundaries05:05 Habit #2 & #3: process and recharge07:07 Habit #4 Peace of mind habits09:17 Focus on what's most meaningful---🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠📍 Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

January was a hectic month for 3 reasons: 1) My partner moved his gym to a new location, 2) We started the year off with a very sick little boy, 3) I worked on aligning The Exploring Introvert.

Despite needing to clear my schedule for part of the month to care for our kid and to manage logistics at home with the gym move, I made good progress.

The new home page of my website is out (have a look here)

And you can now find The Exploring Introvert on all my social channels.

Although I’m only active on LinkedIn at the moment, I aligned all my socials to make them consistent. Of course, I’ll still be tweaking things here and there (I love to tweak things) the ‘red thread’ is there and I love seeing it all come together!

Despite making good progress under the circumstances, my inner critic did flare up.

Criticizing everything from my parenting choices to my work attitude.

“Shouldn’t you take your kid to the hospital? Why are you even working? You should be here 100% for your child. You’re such a bad mother.”

“Why didn’t you get more done for work this week? Yes, your child is sick but you’re a business owner and you should be getting after it.”

“Look at that post, that person is doing so much better than you. I knew it, you’re never going to make this business work.”

Have you noticed that when you’re especially tired, the inner critic becomes louder?

The inner critic can get downright nasty. Comparing you to others and pointing out all the tiny mistakes that you’re making. Like a bully blasting an annoying song on repeat.

The critic can hold on to old patterns (one of mine is to forgo rest and to give everything that I have, only to run on empty). The critic can suck up the little energy that you have left. It will try to push you to do things that make sense on paper but that typically take you farther away from what you really need. Proper mental rest.

That’s why I believe that knowing how to pace yourself is an undervalued skill, especially for introverts. Learn more in this month’s update.

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00:00 My biggest lesson this month: knowing how to pace yourself is an undervalued skill

01:18 Moving my partner's gym

03:01 Combining family and career

05:42 Further aligning 🧭 The Exploring Introvert

07:38 Building a support network as an entrepreneur

08:54 Learning to pace myself

11:04 “If you only have 40% and you gave 40%, then you gave 100%” - Jim Kwik

11:40 If you’re an introvert with a strong inner critic

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🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠

📍 Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

---

Between the busy-ness of the Christmas Holidays, my partner getting injured and a big (first time) project for my business, this one is full of ups and downs.

In this podcast, I tell you about what has been happening behind the scenes in my business, why I was absent from the podcast for 3 months and the lessons I’ve learned.

You’ll also learn how you can get exclusive behind the scenes access to how I organize things in my daily life as a work-from home mom, business owner and fellow introvert.

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00:00 This month’s update

00:17 Christmas busy-ness

01:37 A business that runs without me

03:37 Setting up The Exploring Introvert

04:03 World Introvert Day

05:15 Behind the scenes

08:12 Community

08:56 This month's lessons

10:15 Get exclusive insider access

11:10 What to keep and what to let go

---

✨ Sign up for the exclusive insider series: go.thefrankermessage.com/insider

🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠

📍 Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

---

I choose the resources below out of my own interest and I share them with you to give you context. I’m not affiliated with anyone mentioned in this podcast episode.

📖 https://www.introvert.day/

I’ve been a bit absent from the podcast but a lot has been happening behind the scenes. A short chapter today to update you on what’s been going on and what’s coming for the podcast. We’re talking about one word that ties this community of introverts together and the NEW NAME OF THE PODCAST!

We’re also taking on a new format for the podcast: fewer but more regular updates once a month. New monthly updates will be released now every first Thursday of the month. We’ll look back at the past month and what I’m currently researching, experimenting with, and what I’ve learned.

If you want a little bit more or prefer written summaries, sign up for my newsletter 🧭 THE EXPLORING INTROVERT for my best eye-opening and empowering lessons for introverts in your inbox twice a month: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠

I’m excited - and a little bit nervous - about these changes. I’m working hard to improve the podcast and I’ll do my very best to make it worth while your attention.

Thank you for hanging out with me today, have a great Christmas, and I’ll see you again on January 2nd 👋

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00:00 Update and what’s been happening behind the scenes

00:28 The Exploring Introvert (new podcast name!!)

01:26 Tying it together

02:19 What’s going to happen?

03:37 New chapters once a month

04:49 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter

05:40 See you again on Jan 2nd!

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Sign up for 🧭 The Exploring Introvert newsletter: ⁠thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠ Visit my website: thefrankermessage.com

Follow me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/

Taking longer periods of time off from work has been a long standing dream of mine. I never thought it would be possible for me and I was always happy to get the rare 2 weeks off per year. Usually, I barely felt refreshed after 2 weeks off and the cycle would start again.

When I started my coaching business, I realized that I had the opportunity to make this dream a reality. I decided that if I really wanted to take a couple of months off per year, that I would start practicing.

I’ve taken 2 months off work during the summer holidays for the third year now, reducing my workload to 1-2 hours a day and spending the rest of the time with my family and traveling.

You could say that, at the moment, this is my version of Bill Gates’ famous think week: a week with no distractions that Bill Gates spends in a cabin in the woods to think about his professional and personal decisions.

In today’s chapter, I’m sharing with you why a “think week” is an invaluable way to check your compass and to step away from the busy-ness of every day life so that you can do re-focus on the things that are meaningful to you.

My “think week” didn’t exactly go to plan and initially I was frustrated. But, even when things don’t go according to plan, they can still be valuable. I’ll tell you about how I was able to change my mindset around my failed plan and the valuable lessons I learned from this years think week.

00:00 Here we are again! (Off to a nervous start)

00:21 When you prefer to be behind the scenes but you host a video podcast

01:11 taking 2 months off work every year had been a dream of mine

02:25 My version of Bill Gates' famous think week

03:17 Reducing my workload to 1-2 hours a day

04:18 When you get caught up in the busy-ness of everyday work

06:02 Things that don't go according to plan can still be valuable

08:51 From frustrated to focused

10:41 When excitement meets fear

11:58 Life is more than just your work

Go here:

➡️ To read my blog about my experiments with taking 2 months off work each year: https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog/2-months-off

⭐ To follow the podcast: ⁠⁠Follow the podcast⁠⁠

⭐ To contact me: ⁠⁠contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠⁠

⭐ To visit my website: ⁠⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

After a 2 months break, we are kicking off season 4!

This podcast chapter takes a look back. I'm sharing clips from the two most popular chapters from last season.

These chapters are all about energy and energy management for introverts.

From a personal perspective, struggles with an energy rollercoaster for a long time led me to believe that I was just "sickly" and "couldn't handle" as much as other people could.

I kept telling myself (and others) that I was a low energy person and it became a barrier for me to go out and to do things I wanted to do.

I tell you more about low energy in the first clip.

Introvert hangover was one of the reasons for my energy rollercoaster, although I didn't know that at the time.

Introvert hangover (or getting peopled out, overstimulation, social drain) is when introverts become extremely tired or even ill after a really busy time or from too much social interaction.

I tell you more about some of the science behind the introvert hangover in the second clip.

If you found this podcast helpful, please share it with a friend!

Go here for:

The full podcast chapters

➡️ ⁠Are you a low energy person?⁠

➡️ ⁠Everything you need to know about introvert hangover⁠

Other resources mentioned in this podcast chapter

➡️ ⁠12 signs you have an introvert hangover on Introvert, Dear⁠

➡️ ⁠Is dopamine really "the happy hormone"?⁠

⭐ To follow the podcast: ⁠Follow the podcast⁠

⭐ To contact me: ⁠contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠

⭐ To visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠