Episodios

  • How to Set the Right Goals in Life

    How to Set the Right Goals in Life
    Jan 19 2026
    Most of us know that we should set goals, but there is a lot of confusion about why they matter and how to choose them well.In this episode of Office Hours, I reflect on the difference between meaning and purpose, and on how the goals we pursue quietly shape the direction of our lives. I talk about why some goals leave us feeling empty even when we achieve them, and what it means to aim our lives toward something that truly matters.My hope is that this episode invites you to pause, think about your goals in life, and consider whether the path you are on is leading you where you want to go.—Brought to you by:• ⁠David Protein⁠—The most effective portable protein on the planet ⁠http://www.davidprotein.com/arthur⁠ —Where to find Arthur Brooks: • Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ • X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠officehours@arthurbrooks.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Timestamps:(00:00) Intro(05:00) The three components of meaning(08:14) Big goals, and why most of us are not Mother Teresa(09:55) Proxy goals, and how they can lead us to feel more purpose(13:16) Jung’s philosophy on good goals (14:42) An extrinsic motivation (17:20) Intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation(19:14) Goals based in avoidance (21:34) Positional goals (24:33) Focus on love, not things(28:15) Listen to the small voice (31:40) Enjoy the happy journey(34:08) Stay flexible(37:09) Q&A: Fasting vs. a heavy protein breakfast (38:17) Q&A: How to teach your children to be happier (39:44) Q&A: Navigating a big transition—Referenced: • The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness: https://www.amazon.com/Meaning-Your-Life-Finding-Emptiness/dp/0593545427• The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale • The Three Macronutrients of Happiness, and How to Measure Yours: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/podcast/the-three-macronutrients-of-happiness-and-how-to-measure-yours • The why to bear any how: Goal self-concordance, meaning, and depressive and anxious symptomatology: https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2024-69173-001 • Intrinsic and extrinsic motivation from a self-determination theory perspective: Definitions, theory, practices, and future directions: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0361476X20300254• Effects of externally mediated rewards on intrinsic motivation: https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1971-22190-001 • Evaluation of the Happiness Through Goal-Setting Training: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35084260 • Compared to whom? Inequality, social comparison, and happiness in the United States: https://research.manchester.ac.uk/en/publications/compared-to-whom-inequality-social-comparison-and-happiness-in-th • The Confessions of St. Augustine: https://www.gutenberg.org/files/3296/3296-h/3296-h.htm • Monkey see, monkey do: Model behavior in early childhood: https://www.canr.msu.edu/news/monkey_see_monkey_do_model_behavior_in_early_childhood • ...References continued at: ⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠—Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
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    42 m
  • The 9 Signs You’re Dating a Dark Triad (and How to Spot Them Early)

    The 9 Signs You’re Dating a Dark Triad (and How to Spot Them Early)
    Jan 17 2026

    Most people don’t get hurt in relationships because they’re weak. They get hurt because they’re kind, trusting, and fall too quickly for the wrong kind of person.In this clip, I explain the Dark Triad personality traits: Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and Psychopathy, and why they’re so destructive in romantic relationships.If you’ve ever wondered why you ignored the red flags, or how to spot them next time, this is for you.If you're curious about your Dark Triad traits and tendencies, I've created a new, free Dark Triad test that asks 27 questions that test your levels of Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and Psychopathy. Take it here: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/quiz/darktriadYou’ll learn:• The 9 early warning signs of a dark triad personality.• Why some people seem incredibly charming at first — and how they weaponize empathy.• How the brain chemistry of “falling in love” makes you vulnerable to manipulation.• A psychological defense plan to recognize and protect yourself from emotional predators.Connect and Subscribe:Website: https://arthurbrooks.com/Newsletter: https://arthurbrooks.com/newsletterX (Twitter): https://x.com/arthurbrooksInstagram: https://instagram.com/arthurcbrooksFacebook: https://facebook.com/arthurbrooksYouTube: @drarthurbrooksLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/Email: officehours@arthurbrooks.comReferenced/Further Reading: • The Dark Triad of Personality: Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and Psychopathy: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886911003477 • Dark Triad Traits and Relationship Dissolution: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886917303720 • Scott Barry Kaufman – The Light Triad and Humanism: https://scottbarrykaufman.com/
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    14 m
  • How to Control Your Emotions (According to Neuroscience)

    How to Control Your Emotions (According to Neuroscience)
    Jan 15 2026

    Most people think emotions happen to them. In reality, emotions are signals—and you can learn to manage them.

    In this clip, I break down how emotions move from the limbic system, where they’re generated, to the prefrontal cortex, where you can interpret, direct, and act on them wisely. This is the difference between being controlled by your emotions and learning to control them. You’ll learn why “counting to ten” actually works (and why 30 seconds is even better), how metacognition gives your thinking brain time to catch up with your feeling brain, and how simple practices like journaling, contemplation, and emotional documentation physically change how your brain processes stress, fear, and anger. We also explore how modern life keeps your amygdala constantly activated, turning natural episodic fear into chronic anxiety, and how to reverse that by turning vague anxiety back into clear, manageable fear using structured writing techniques.


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    17 m
  • How to Stop Caring What Others Think

    How to Stop Caring What Others Think
    Jan 12 2026
    Why do we care so much about what other people think of us?In this episode of Office Hours, I explain the science behind why concern about others’ opinions is so powerful in the first place. I talk about the two reasons we are wired to care what people think, how our brains treat social judgment as a real threat, and why this fear can quietly shape our choices, our behavior, and even our sense of self.Once we understand what is happening in our minds and bodies, we can start to loosen its grip. I share three ways to break out of this pattern and begin caring less about other people’s opinions, not by ignoring them entirely, but by relating to them more wisely. My hope is that these ideas help you move with more freedom, show up more authentically, and live with less unnecessary fear of being judged.—Where to find Arthur Brooks: • Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ • X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠officehours@arthurbrooks.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Timestamps:(00:00) Intro(03:20) The two reasons you care what others think about you(13:53) BIS and BAS: why fear of judgment can keep you stuck(19:00) The role of shame and when it turns destructive (23:46) Way #1: No one cares(27:05) Way #2: Rebel against your shame(30:42) Way #3: Don’t judge, and you will not be judged(34:01) Recap of the 3 ways to stop caring so much about what others think of you(35:06) Q&A: Helping someone regulate emotions during conflict(38:53) Q&A: Adapting the morning protocol for late or irregular schedules(40:06) Q&A: What we know about cold therapy and depression—Referenced: • The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness: https://www.amazon.com/Meaning-Your-Life-Finding-Emptiness/dp/0593545427• The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale • The sociopaths among us: How to spot (and avoid) a Dark Triad: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/podcast/the-sociopaths-among-us-how-to-spot-and-avoid-a-dark-triad • Meditations by Marcus Aurelius: https://vreeman.com/meditations • Intellectual Trust in Oneself and Others: https://www.amazon.com/Intellectual-Oneself-Cambridge-Studies-Philosophy/dp/0521793• ...References continued at: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours—Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
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    43 m
  • The 8 Life Lessons that Hoda Kotb Follows

    The 8 Life Lessons that Hoda Kotb Follows
    Jan 5 2026
    In this episode of Office Hours, I sit down with my friend Hoda Kotb and talk about how we meet change when it shows up uninvited. Hoda has lived through transitions that resist simple narratives. Early rejection in her career. Public reinvention. Serious illness. Grief. Becoming a parent later in life. Each chapter forced a decision about how to move forward when there were no clear answers.Hoda is known to millions as the longtime co-anchor of NBC’s Today Show and as the host of Making Space. In our conversation, those titles matter less than the life behind them. What connects us to Hoda’s story is not her achievements, but the ordinary human moments that shaped her values and continue to guide her choices. I hope this conversation leaves you not only inspired by Hoda’s life but also more willing to meet your own with honesty, courage, and care.—Brought to you by:• David Protein—The most effective portable protein on the planet http://www.davidprotein.com/arthur ⁠—Where to find Hoda Kotb:• X: https://x.com/hodakotb • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hodakotb • Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HodaKotb• Website: https://www.hodakotb.com • Podcast: https://www.today.com/podcasts/making-space Where to find Arthur Brooks: • Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ • X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠officehours@arthurbrooks.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Timestamps:(00:00) Intro(03:22) Introducing Hoda Kotb(06:03) Hoda’s origin story as a first-generation American(07:27) The inspiration Hoda gets from her mother (08:48) Hoda’s mother’s journey with grief and what it teaches her(11:23) Lesson #1: Reframe tragedy as opportunity(16:25) Lesson #2: Turn constraints into decisions(27:25) Lesson #3: Persistence creates destiny(31:44) Lesson #4: Keep learning(32:40) Hoda’s breast cancer journey(37:55) Lesson #5: Your suffering is your strength(40:39) How Hoda became a parent at 52(46:42) Lesson #6: Choose love(52:20) Lesson #7: Choose a new tree(58:50) Lesson #8: You’re in charge(59:05) A quick recap of the eight lessons—Referenced: • Jump and Find Joy: Embracing Change in Every Season of Life: https://www.amazon.com/Jump-Find-Joy-Embracing-Change/dp/B0DZ5BVKH8 • Joy 101: https://www.joy101.com • Joy 101 2026 retreat: https://www.joy101.com/spring-retreat-2026⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
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    1 h y 3 m
  • 3 Ways to Set Smarter New Year’s Resolutions

    3 Ways to Set Smarter New Year’s Resolutions
    Dec 29 2025
    Every New Year, we set ambitious goals. Unfortunately, most of our resolutions fade faster than we would like to admit.In this episode of Office Hours, I explain why New Year’s resolutions so often fail. This isn’t a question of discipline per se. Instead, our failure occurs because of the way we frame our goals (and how we sometimes set the wrong goals in the first place). I explain how these forces leave us feeling discouraged and stuck.The good news: there’s a better way to set and achieve your New Year’s resolutions. I walk through how to design your goals in the right way, so that progress depends less on force of will and more on positive incentives. I break this into simple steps grounded in what we know about how people actually change.If you are thinking about resolutions this year, this episode will help you choose goals that truly support your well-being.—Where to find Arthur Brooks: • Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ • X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠officehours@arthurbrooks.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction(02:36) Where New Year’s resolutions come from(04:38) Why New Year’s resolutions often fail(06:50) What the data says about resolution success(08:35) Why positive goals work better than negative goals(11:44) The forces outside you that sabotage your goals(14:50) Step#1: Make your goals positive (19:12) Step #2: Tiny goals(21:34) Step #3: The right way to have negative goals(29:11) Why forgiveness is a powerful happiness goal(31:51) Q&A: Keeping peace without ignoring others’ pain(33:09) Q&A: Letting go of grievances—Referenced: • The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale • How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/• The Happiness Files: Insights on Work and Life: https://www.amazon.com/Happiness-Files-Insights-Arthur-Brooks/dp/B0F4MFQ6VN• The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness: https://www.amazon.com/Meaning-Your-Life-Finding-Emptiness/dp/0593545427• The History of New Year’s Resolutions: https://www.history.com/articles/the-history-of-new-years-resolutions • New Year, new you: https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2013/12/31/new-year-new-you • Auld lang syne: success predictors, change processes, and self-reported outcomes of New Year's resolvers and nonresolvers: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11920693 • One in five Americans has stuck to their 2018 New Year’s Resolution: https://today.yougov.com/society/articles/21098-2018-new-years-resolutions-update • ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
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    35 m
  • My 4-Step Method for Making the Holidays Better

    My 4-Step Method for Making the Holidays Better
    Dec 22 2025
    Does Christmas never live up to the version you remember from childhood? Or does it bring up painful memories that keep you stuck in the past? Or maybe you’re like I once was, feeling more like a curmudgeon than a bundle of holiday cheer.In this episode of Office Hours, I explain why the holidays so often surface disappointment, sadness, and annoyance, and what research on memory reveals about why this happens. I share ways to reframe difficult memories, and my Christmas protocol, designed to help quiet the noise, focus on what truly matters, and move through the season with more gratitude and peace.—Where to find Arthur Brooks: • Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ • X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠officehours@arthurbrooks.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Timestamps:(00:00) Intro(03:13) Three common holiday mood problems(04:10) Problem #1: Disappointment (13:12) Problem #2: Sadness(18:20) Problem #3: Annoyance (21:36) Christmas protocol step #1: Start before dawn(25:00) Christmas protocol step #2: Go for a walk (26:00) Christmas protocol step #3: Write a gratitude letter(26:39) Christmas protocol step #4: Give back (28:32) Q&A: How a sleep schedule affects happiness(30:21) Q&A: Dealing with burnout as a spiral career type (31:55) Q&A: How to make close friends later in life —Referenced: • The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale • How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/• Remembering the past to imagine the future: the prospective brain: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17700624/ • Is Nostalgia a Past or Future-Oriented Experience? Affective, Behavioral, Social Cognitive, and Neuroscientific Evidence: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7326063 • Perspectives on episodic-like and episodic memory: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23616754 • Episodic memory: from mind to brain: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11752477 • Not all emotions are created equal: The negativity bias in social-emotional development: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3652533 • Attributions, deception, and event-related potentials: an investigation of the self-serving bias: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/18282197• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
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    35 m
  • 3 Ways to Want Less and Be Happier

    3 Ways to Want Less and Be Happier
    Dec 15 2025
    Satisfaction is one of the three macronutrients of happiness, yet it has a way of slipping through our fingers. We reach a long-awaited goal, feel a brief lift, and then find ourselves wanting something more. In this episode of Office Hours, I explore why this happens and how our ancient impulses keep pulling us back toward craving and comparison. I talk about the tendencies that erode our sense of fulfillment and why relying on achievement or recognition for lasting joy never works. I share three practical ways to train your brain to want less. As always, my hope is that you practice this in your life and share it with others, so together we can loosen the grip of constant wanting and make more room for love and happiness.If you’re interested in finding out if you have a satisfaction deficiency, take the Happiness Scale here. —Where to find Arthur Brooks: • Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ • X: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://x.com/arthurbrooks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGuyFRjJQFGCKzfHTBvWM6A⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• LinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/arthur-c-brooks/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠• Email: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠officehours@arthurbrooks.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Timestamps:00:00) Intro(02:28) A quick review of the components of happiness(04:45) What satisfaction really is (05:31) Why satisfaction is so hard to hold onto(10:06) The value of struggle(14:33) Why satisfaction fades quickly and renews our wanting(25:41) Why you need to stand up to your animal impulses(37:04) Step #1: Turn the prince into the sage(41:02) Step #2: Make a reverse bucket list (44:28) Step #3: Get smaller (50:33) Q&A: How to help kids find joy outside of screen time (53:00) Q&A: How to cope with chronic pain —Referenced: • How to Build a Life: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/• The Rolling Stones - (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction (Official Lyric Video): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrIPxlFzDi0 • Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence: https://www.amazon.com/Dopamine-Nation-Finding-Balance-Indulgence/dp/152474672X • Never Enough: The Neuroscience and Experience of Addiction: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Enough-Neuroscience-Experience-Addiction/dp/0385542844 • Hedonic Relativism and Planning the Good Society: https://findingaids.library.northwestern.edu/repositories/6/archival_objects/473411 • Prospect Theory: An Analysis of Decision under Risk: https://doi.org/10.2307/1914185• Why Do We Overindulge?: https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2024/05/why-do-we-overindulge • ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—Production and marketing by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://penname.co/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.
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    58 m